Talk:Michael Jackson
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LOL I LOVE MICHAEL JACKSON BUT THIS ARTICLE IS FUNNY.....I SUGGEST U PUT THAT mICHAEL WAS THE OFFSPRING OF EMINEM AND MADONNA. Of course it's not true!
Funny? Not really... Ok we get the point, Michael's been accused of lewd acts with children twice. The jokes have gotten old, and I think this article would be more affective if we poked fun at the real artist, not what the media made him out to be. There should be more jokes about songs, and performance style and what not.
69.158.21.209 04:09, 14 December 2007 (UTC)PW
MICHAEL JACKSON IS AWESOME!!
YES, VERY TRUE! I AM OFFENDED BY PAST OF PAGE MANY LIES!
[edit] You'll grow out of it.
1. Let me say Past of Page can't help it. He's a pathological liar.
2. Once you get to be 14, little boy, and experience a real man's dick in your ass, Michael Jackson won't seem so "awesome" by comparison! (NOT MINE! I'm straight. I prefer adult women - I swear to God!)
rofl
- im taking out a repeated joke in the trivia section. Originality is wanted.
WTF YOU ARE SICK!!
but yea it kinda is the truth lol
R u sure you'l grow out of it?? you may never!
Meow!!!!!!!!! MMMMMM.........MMMMM Duccies.. Bownchickawowow!!!! lol
MILK THE COW!
Don't Let Him Touch His PeePee or He wiill Explode....
[edit] Here's a good joke for the article...
I mean, it's another molestation joke, but I'm just to lazy to do all of this.
Jackson recently died because of food poisoning - he eat twelve year old nuts.
Now come on. That's a little funny (I guess) and a way to end off the article.
[edit] This article crosses the line
Don't get me wrong. I really enjoy this site. I know this is uncyclopedia and I know people are meant to make fun of things here, but this article goes too far. Molestation joke after molestation joke after molestation joke. There are other ways to parody Michael Jackson's image than to magnify crimes he was falsely accused of, tried and acquitted for. These idiots need to grow up and get a better sense of humour.
- Err, there's no way of knowing whether or not he was falsely accused. Just because he was acquitted of the charges doesn't mean he didn't commit the crimes.--Mister Nosey 07:07, 19 August 2006 (UTC)
True, but the actual educated guess says he didn't. 86.41.160.187
Regardless weather it crosses the line or not, this article fails. --Han 08:55, 15 October 2006 (UTC)
Does this article cross the line? Maybe. Did Michael Jackson molest little boys? Yes. --Rice80 03:01, 22 November 2006 (UTC)
- Oh, well he MUST then, because you said so, as opposed to the courts, who said he didn't. Right. I forgot idiots like you thought they were above the better judgment of our justice system. --An Actual Professor of Factual History
- Does this article cross the line? Yes. Did Michael Jackson molest little boys? NO! Are you seriously telling me 12 citizens of this country took and oath in the name of Justice, and for no reason whatsoever broke it? That will require a lot of explaining -- and I want to hear it! This nonsense is like the McMartin Witch Hunt; those people were railroaded and prosecuted on the basis of a case made up of infamous falsehoods and distortions - infamous falsehoods and distortions on a scale so huge that I never imagined until that day that our nation's system of justice was capable of ugliness! I have served on a jury, I know something of what it's about, I've taken the oath. And I tell you there is no way any jury in their right mind would have not rendered a verdic of NOT GUILY unless he actually was just that! (or are you about to tell me those 12 people were all mentally incompetent?) The evidence in the case was presented, and to say that the jury found it somewhat lacking would be an understatement. In a fair trial, a citizen is PRESUMED INNOCENT and is entitled to confront the evidence against them and present evidence to refute that evidence. Jackson's defense team showed the Prosecutions case for what it was -- a conglomeration of infamous falsehoods and distortions! And if you are about to say otherwise, then you can explain to me why 12 citizens didn't rule otherwise. You tell me why 12 citezens of this country deliberately let a child molester go free. That's something no decent American would ever do -- our people hate molesters, and you know it. --The Odious Wasp 20:30, 12 May 2007 (UTC)
- I'll touch your penis.--The4sword 18:13, 22 August 2007 (UTC)
- Does this article cross the line? Yes. Did Michael Jackson molest little boys? NO! Are you seriously telling me 12 citizens of this country took and oath in the name of Justice, and for no reason whatsoever broke it? That will require a lot of explaining -- and I want to hear it! This nonsense is like the McMartin Witch Hunt; those people were railroaded and prosecuted on the basis of a case made up of infamous falsehoods and distortions - infamous falsehoods and distortions on a scale so huge that I never imagined until that day that our nation's system of justice was capable of ugliness! I have served on a jury, I know something of what it's about, I've taken the oath. And I tell you there is no way any jury in their right mind would have not rendered a verdic of NOT GUILY unless he actually was just that! (or are you about to tell me those 12 people were all mentally incompetent?) The evidence in the case was presented, and to say that the jury found it somewhat lacking would be an understatement. In a fair trial, a citizen is PRESUMED INNOCENT and is entitled to confront the evidence against them and present evidence to refute that evidence. Jackson's defense team showed the Prosecutions case for what it was -- a conglomeration of infamous falsehoods and distortions! And if you are about to say otherwise, then you can explain to me why 12 citizens didn't rule otherwise. You tell me why 12 citezens of this country deliberately let a child molester go free. That's something no decent American would ever do -- our people hate molesters, and you know it. --The Odious Wasp 20:30, 12 May 2007 (UTC)
The only line on Uncyclopedia is the funny/unfunny line, and this article is firmly in the funny. --Bheid 10:24, 11 December 2007 (UTC)\: Thank-you. --The Odious Wasp 16:53, 23 February 2008 (UTC)
- Thank-you. --The Odious Wasp 16:55, 23 February 2008 (UTC)
[edit] Not funny, Just stupid
The "How To Stay Safe" section is just sad, and I don't feel like doing anything about it.
- Ok, then let's get rid of it. --The Odious Wasp 10:10, 24 May 2007 (UTC)
Hey sorry for enterrupting your laugh but this is just not right You people have no right to make fun over someone : how can you sleep at night ? And cause a person tells the truth is kicked out?? what a fuck is this site anyway? is it for psychos?? hahahah I FORGOT TO LAUGH
[edit] an idea
Try rewriting this article so that it says things like "children" and "touching" and "sleep" wothout ever even mentioning the molestation cases. CchristianTehWazzit
You are all gay. This is a crack up. Michael Jackson is a gay peadafile rapist, and you all know it. Ifray06
[edit] OMG TEH FUNNY
OMG! Yes, ITS ALL SO TRUE that you guys have dicks instead of heads ;)))
[edit] This Page Sucks!!!
No realy who likes him? That's right Me
As far as this guy, I think there's something deeper to his love of MJ.
Whoever added me to the list of people he's better than is a toal n00b. I think that's what his profile is even tagged as.
P.S. MJ was killed via beheadery by David as instructed by Leanne.
[edit] Who the fuck labeled Jacko as a terrible music artist?
I wanna be sedadet
[edit] Disappointed at lack of information
Why has no one made reference to Jacko's obvious vampiric tendencies?
- Not vampire; wolfman and zombie.--The Odious Wasp 10:37, 10 May 2007 (UTC)
[edit] Yawn
Think of something to joke about other than 'he did a 12-year-old kid'. It's funny the first time. Maybe the second. Even the third for some poeple. But after that it's just repetetive and unfunny. Give the guy a break!
- True, this article is so full of tautological shit it's just.. boring. --BiT 23:37, 2 April 2007 (UTC)
Mooooo...Mmmmm COW!.....Quack Quack i'm a dog!!! what the fuck !
I LOVE MJ!!!!....up the um...*looks away* fuck you
[edit] Did you hear?
The only thing Mcdonalds and Micheal Jackson have in common is they both like to stick their meat between 8 year old buns.
Micheal Jackson used to be the worst pop star of Galienia 4...but soon his genetic remains soon came to earth, then we saw weird masturbator, child rapist and baby dangler... On Galienia 4 he caught many sexual diseases from the infected prostitutes, he is said that he practiced his raping on pillows and on baby stuffed animals.
If you see him you are expected to do one of the following:
- Run like hell
- Act like an adult willing to call the police if you are a 8 year old kid he is after, seriously, he can't tell the difference
- Run like hell
- Stand up as high as you can on your girly gay high heels and go "RAWR!"
- Get a sex change so he will go after someone else
- Have him get drunk on his own "Jesus Juice"
- Just don't play gay
If you read this, Then you are GAY, If you decided to delete this, You did not do the right thing
Our final statement is
Micheal Jackson is a nut groping, child fondling molester, undeserving gaylord, and a dick sucking motherfucker.
Thank you all for not listening to any of his pleads in court
- For you to know and be so certain of these facts, you must have been there your self. The only way you cold know these things is you were there and participated. Shame on you! Of course, such a person would never really confess to such atrocities, so you are really making such outlandish accusations whithout a shred of evidence to back them up. I know that Uncyclopedia is a mockumentary site, but doesn't it have policies against libel? And you are so brave too -- so brave, that you won't even sign your message. --The Odious Wasp 20:45, 12 May 2007 (UTC)
- Regardless, Wasp - he's a FUCKING FREAK!!! Jesus, can't you see it?? He's bleached his skin sheet-white (and don't hand me that 'skin disease' crap - I've seen vitiligo first hand and it spots CERTAIN AREAS of the skin a few shades lighter. It does NOT effect the whole damn complexion. He's had so many nose jobs all he's got left is a hole!! He's NUTS! He's fifty goddam years old and he hangs with pre-pubuscent boys. I don't care if he didn't have a childhood that's just freaking CREAPY!! His brothers didn't have much of childhood either and they're not out play-dating with little boys, are they?? Huh??? Are they??? As for your 'twelve good jurors' crap, need I remind you of O.J. Simpson?? GUILTY AS SIN but acquitted by a jury of twelve STAR STRUCK AMERICAN IDIOTS... 65.69.81.2 18:06, 15 May 2007 (UTC)
- His appearance was not the subject. Since you've brought it up -- ugh! When I saw the latest pictures of him, I almost threw up. I've never liked his looks ever since he first had himself caucasianized. Now, he's freaking ugly. There was a song by him I remember that went something like "It don't matter if you're black or white;" he should have been singing "I don't know if I'm black or white." As for O.J. Simpson, I believe he is not guilty and repeat what I said before: I tell you there is no way any jury in their right mind would have not rendered a verdict of NOT GUILTY unless he actually was just that! . Are you seriously telling me 12 citizens of this country took the oath in the name of Justice, and for no reason whatsoever broke it? That will require a lot of explaining -- and I want to hear it! --The Odious Wasp 08:37, 21 May 2007 (UTC)
- Nothing to say? --The Odious Wasp 11:44, 25 May 2007 (UTC)
- Well, you see, I have a life that doesn't revolve around arguing with some idiot that: A) Doesn't think Michael Jackson is a complete and utter freak and.. B) Thinks O.J. is innocent (I'm STILL laughing my ass off over that one!). You are a prime example of what celebrity defense lawyers hope and pray for - a star-struck celebrity worshipper and why there are two sets of standards in the US judicial system: One for the celebrities and another one for the average joe's like you. I bet you signed the petition to "Set Paris Free" too, didn't you? By the way, are you planning on buying O.J.'s latest venture into the literary world entitled "IF I Did It"? Thank God for the Goldman family and that wrongful death suit (which they WON, by the way). I'm sure you'll have a really snappy come back for this as soon as you get back from the McDonald's drive through so I can hardly wait. Let the hilarity ensue!! 65.69.81.2 21:22, 21 June 2007 (UTC)
- What part of "I've never liked his looks ever since he first had himself caucasianized. Now, he's freaking ugly." didn't you understand? I never said that "[I DON'T] think Michael Jackson is a complete and utter freak" and I would appreciate you not putting words in my mouth. And I have not signed any pettitions -- least of all a pettition to set the city of Paris free. Free from what? Paris was freed from Nazi occupation back in 1944. I am not star-stuck. I take the oath of the jurist very seriously -- though you evidently don't. You are a prime example of why our nation has a guarrantee of the right to trial by jury. Like the judge who presided over the first trial of Dr. Sam Sheppard, you think that the procedure of a trial is only a formality! I am aware of the Goldman lawsuiit results; I considered it a mockery of justice. And you did not answer my question: Are you seriously telling me 12 citizens of this country took the oath in the name of Justice, and for no reason whatsoever broke it? Why on earth would they do such a thing? Are seriously telling me a group of 12 competent citizens are completly brainless? Why do you speak of star stuck? What does that have to do with anything? A jury makes their decisions based on facts and evidence -- that is all! The jury deliberated the case for 10 whole days before handing down their verdict; how can you say that after all that effort, they rendered an unjust verdict? --The Odious Wasp 14:17, 24 June 2007 (UTC)
If pigment is lost in the skin, we're not talking shades, we're talking complete loss of colour. He's admitted to covering up leftover spots on his face with make-up. Regarding the case, you need to look at the accuser as well as the accused. That boy's mum had sued security guards before for assault even though it was completely false, and she also sued her husband for battery though he was innocent too. Her testimony was a drama audition and the boy's was jumbled and incohorent. The entire thing was clearly an attempt to take advantage of the man's image and score some big bucks. THAT, my friend, is the way it went down. 83.71.80.151 22:31, 20 May 2007 (UTC)
[edit] Um....some new jokes
Hi. Um I'm new here, and although I think the page is hilarious (that joke comparing mj to acne is funny), can we come up with some new jokes to replace the 50,000 molestor jokes? (Yeah, I happen to be a mj fan 2) IE: the disappointing sales of Invincible, him coming to the Grammyss with Emmanuel Lewis, his marriage to Lisa Marie......and keep like maybe 25 to 30 molesting jokes? Make sure they're original tho....seriously, the whole mj molestor thing is SO 2003. Majic 05:24, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
[edit] Pfff
SA-MI BAG PULA-N SITEU VOSTRU LUA-MI-ATI COAIELE LA SUPT! TRANSLATION : YOUR SITE IS GREAT!
Who ever made this page is SICK And NEEDS SOME HELP!!!! If u dont like Mike, thats fine, WHO NEEDS YOU!!!! But YOU AINT GOT THE RIGHT 2 JUDGE!!! ONLY GOD DOES!!! SO SNAP OUT OF UR DREAM AND COME OUT TO THE REAL WORLD WHERE U SEEM 2 B MISRABLE!!! WOW, It takes makin An Anti-MJ page to make u feel better 'bout ur self???? HOW VERY SAD. Cuz' Ur actually giving attention 2 him when u say u dont like him!! SO that means I guess U REally really really like him and is VERY Jelous of him!!! INCREDBLE!!!!
[edit] interwiki
MUIE MULTA CUI A FACUT SIETU ASTA! SUNETI DE RAHAT IMPUTIT....YOU ONLY HAVE GUTS ON KEYBOARD BUT IN THE REAL LIFE I BET YOU SUCK BIG TIME...YOURE MORE GAY THAN ANYONE HERE AROUND..I BET YOULL SHINE MICHAEL'S SHOES WITH YOUR LIPS IF YOU'D SEE HIM FACE TO FACE whilted shit that u are! have a great pathetic life :)) while FANS DANCE SMILE LAUGH SING DANCE MOONWALKER STYLE!CHA'MONE!!
[edit] The Latest Version
Can some fix it up? the page is 85-90% pedofile jokes. I understand soome people think he did it (me honestly, I don't think he did) but most of em aren't even funny (like the introduction....especially that clown pic....wtf?) oh and ps. that username shit......U caught me with that. lol MaJic 03:13, 12 March 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you for your suggestion! When you feel an article needs fixin', please feel obligated to make whatever changes you feel are needed, (even though they'll probably be reverted 5 seconds later). Uncyclopedia is a wiki, so almost anyone can edit almost any article by almost simply following the edit link almost at the top. You don't even need to log in in most cases! (Although there are some reasons why you might like to...) The Uncyclopedia Cabal encourages you to be italic. Don't worry too much about making honest mistakes—they're likely to be found and corrected quickly, and your 6 month ban will fly by faster than you think. If you're not sure how editing works, check out proper wiki formatting, or use the sandbox to try out your vandalizing skills. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon
(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 03:16, Mar 12
[edit] From Pee
| Humo(u)r: | 5 | Didn't find it that funny. I heard all of those jokes trillions of times before. This artcle is really just like kicking a dead horse over and over and over and... |
| Concept: | 6 | Not really original. |
| Prose and Formatting: | 7 | Too many red links and some grammatical errors. Kind of long. |
| Images: | 8 | I liked most of the pictures. |
| Miscellaneous: | 6 | Whatever... |
| Final Score: | 32 | I really don't see why this was put on the Pee Review. This article is just average. I wouldn't put this on VFH if that was what you were thinking of doing. It wouldn't get featured. |
| Reviewer: | --Dexter111344 06:41, 31 May 2007 (UTC) | |
Michael Jackson is rather debatable. Homo, peado, bi or necrofile? Maybe all of them?
Michael Jackson = Pee. Fact.


