The Second Coming

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“You bastards! You have found out the day of the coming!”

~ Jesus Christ on The Second Coming

The Second Coming is the time when Jesus Christ will come down from Heaven, and the world will end. It is also the day when there will be a battle royale, between the armies of heaven, and those of Hell. Using very complex mathematics (addition, multiplication, and subtraction), the date of this coming has been found! The second cumming is slower and more relaxed than the first cumming. The lady likes it better. The Second Coming should not be confused with the second cumming when a man reaches his second sexual climax.

[edit] The Complex Mathematics

Using the numbers 666 (the number of the devil) and 777 (the number of God), the date has been found.

Firstly, it is decided that the Second Coming will be days after the day that one of the Devil's Sergeants, George W. Bush, became the President of the United States of America. This day shall be known as D-Day Mach I

To find the number of years D-Day Mach I, the following was done:

So therefore, it is 1417 years from D-Day Mach I.

Then we find how many months are remaining by doing the following:

So therefore, it is 1417 years and 8 months from D-Day Mach I

Then, we find how many days are remaining, by doing the following:

Now, we round this number to 29 days. This means we have found that the Second Coming will be 1417 years 8 months and 29 days after D-Day Mach I.

D-Day Mach I was 20 January 2001. 1417 years from that is 20 January 3418. 8 months from that is 20 September 3418. 29 days from that is 19 October 3418. This is the date of the Second Coming.

[edit] The Thoughts Behind The Complex Mathematics

“The Second Coming is an excellent way to prove to the world that I am not the devil. I am only one of his servents”

~ George W. Bush on The Second Coming

I had a dream. A dream where... God came along and said stuff. Then I decided. That's that. Hahaha.

[edit] References

• My brain
• My dream
• Complex Maths