The Shredder
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“Ow! DEAR GOD HEEEEELLLLLPPPP!”
~ Paper on being shredded by Shredder
Contents |
[edit] The Shredder
Born in Sweeeet home Ala-BAM-uh!,Japan to Tom Clancy and somebody..we're not really quite sure....actually we now absoulutely nuttin'(what war is good fo!). The Shredder was one of the leaders of Shredding and spends his time shredding paper,and shredding on his guitar.He enjoys wearing fuzzy slippers and taking long walks on the beach.
[edit] The Oroku Saki Expierence
Later in his life,Shredder formed a band with hip-hop sensation MC Krang and his two idiots Bebop and Rocksteady.The band was most radical and also tubular to the extreme,but it later became funkadelic because the band warped from the 80's all the way back to the 60's. The band was killed in bowling alley shoot-out,but got back up and kicked the crap outta the shooters cause THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT!NO! THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT! THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT.....ANYMORE! The band still performs. Here is a short list of their best songs ever:
I'm Gonna Crap On Your Shoes
What's Your Problem?
I'll Shred Yer Frickin' Eyes Out
The Dimension X Blues
I'm Dreaming Of A Red(with blood) Christmas
Pimp My Evil Fortress
I'm Gonna Crap On Your Shoes Part II(I've Done It Once And I'll Do It Again!)
Crap Factory
Illegal Puppy-Kicking
Why I Think Leonard Nimoy's Cool
[edit] The Technodrome
The Technodrome is the bands roaming house which has feet on the side that'll kick you in the nuts. It Kills stuff and is awesome. It also kills stuff. Besides that it kills things. It kills bears too. It kills dogs. Did I mention it kills stuff?
[edit] Shredding Up The Literature World
The Shredder is also an accomplished novelist and writer of how-to books. Critics absolutely love his work and eat from his toilet for the sake of poetic irony. Many call the books "good","decent,"swell",some would even go as far as to call them "mediocre" Here is a short list of some of his Shredtastic books:
The Shred Of The Krangs
Shredding For Dummies
Shredragon
Shreddy Pothead and The Sorcerer's Stash
Shreddy Pothead and The Chamber Of Pot
Shreddy Pothead was a Prisioner In Askaban
Shreddy Pothead and The Joint On Fire
Shreddy Pothead and The Order Of The Pot
Shreddy Pothead and The Half-Baked Prince
The Hitchhiker's Guide To Shredding
War and Shred
The Shred
[edit] Film Career
The Shredder has wrote,directed,and starred in only one movie,known as "The Shredder Shreds Back!". It is the best movie ever! The plot revolved around how Shredder shredded and had high-action,unrealistic Kung Fu battles with government operatives that were born with the inability to shred(called the Un-Shreds). The movie provides a very true and realistic view of Shredder's life. The movie was so awesome that Mr.T gave it an award,saying,"I Pity myself for not bein' able to Shred like that guy!"
The Shredder also has shown an interest in being Bad-Ass:The Movie 2:The One That Comes After The First,as well as the destruction of various trailer parks that just piss him off.
TMNT Originals
Raphael - Leonardo - Michelangelo - Donatello - George W. Bush - Osama Bin Laden - Towelie - T3h Turtle
Apprentices
Splinter - Roger Clemens - John Cena - Grandma - Yoshi - Shredder - Jack Sparrow - Grandpa - Kobe Bryant
Mousers - John Cena - Oscar Wilde - Your Mom - Adolf Hitler - Mussolini


