The Shredder

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A master Shredder, taking it there
A master Shredder, taking it there

Ow! DEAR GOD HEEEEELLLLLPPPP!

~ Paper on being shredded by Shredder

Contents

[edit] The Shredder

Born in Sweeeet home Ala-BAM-uh!,Japan to Tom Clancy and somebody..we're not really quite sure....actually we now absoulutely nuttin'(what war is good fo!). The Shredder was one of the leaders of Shredding and spends his time shredding paper,and shredding on his guitar.He enjoys wearing fuzzy slippers and taking long walks on the beach.


[edit] The Oroku Saki Expierence

Later in his life,Shredder formed a band with hip-hop sensation MC Krang and his two idiots Bebop and Rocksteady.The band was most radical and also tubular to the extreme,but it later became funkadelic because the band warped from the 80's all the way back to the 60's. The band was killed in bowling alley shoot-out,but got back up and kicked the crap outta the shooters cause THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT!NO! THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT! THEY'RE NOT GONNA TAKE IT.....ANYMORE! The band still performs. Here is a short list of their best songs ever:

I'm Gonna Crap On Your Shoes

What's Your Problem?

I'll Shred Yer Frickin' Eyes Out

The Dimension X Blues

I'm Dreaming Of A Red(with blood) Christmas

Pimp My Evil Fortress

I'm Gonna Crap On Your Shoes Part II(I've Done It Once And I'll Do It Again!)

Crap Factory

Illegal Puppy-Kicking

Why I Think Leonard Nimoy's Cool

[edit] The Technodrome

The Technodrome is the bands roaming house which has feet on the side that'll kick you in the nuts. It Kills stuff and is awesome. It also kills stuff. Besides that it kills things. It kills bears too. It kills dogs. Did I mention it kills stuff?

[edit] Shredding Up The Literature World

The Shredder is also an accomplished novelist and writer of how-to books. Critics absolutely love his work and eat from his toilet for the sake of poetic irony. Many call the books "good","decent,"swell",some would even go as far as to call them "mediocre" Here is a short list of some of his Shredtastic books:

The Shred Of The Krangs

Shredding For Dummies

Shredragon

Shreddy Pothead and The Sorcerer's Stash

Shreddy Pothead and The Chamber Of Pot

Shreddy Pothead was a Prisioner In Askaban

Shreddy Pothead and The Joint On Fire

Shreddy Pothead and The Order Of The Pot

Shreddy Pothead and The Half-Baked Prince

The Hitchhiker's Guide To Shredding

War and Shred

The Shred

[edit] Film Career

The Shredder has wrote,directed,and starred in only one movie,known as "The Shredder Shreds Back!". It is the best movie ever! The plot revolved around how Shredder shredded and had high-action,unrealistic Kung Fu battles with government operatives that were born with the inability to shred(called the Un-Shreds). The movie provides a very true and realistic view of Shredder's life. The movie was so awesome that Mr.T gave it an award,saying,"I Pity myself for not bein' able to Shred like that guy!"

The Shredder also has shown an interest in being Bad-Ass:The Movie 2:The One That Comes After The First,as well as the destruction of various trailer parks that just piss him off.

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