The Yardbirds

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Yardbirds

Biographical information
Homeworld	Crawdaddy, Queenland, USA
Physical description
Species	Too Cool for Art School
Gender	Male
Height	1965
Hair color	Mixed
Chronological and political information
Era(s)	1960s
Affiliation	Mickey Most, Simon Raper Bell, Georgio Golmolski, Peter Grant, Tim Leary, Ho Chi Minh, Gen. Giap, Ms. J. Edgar Hoover, Slim Harpo, Chuck Berry, and Illuminati

[Source]

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about The Yardbirds.

“You're FIRED!”

~ Yardbirds to Jeff Beck

“I QUIT!!”

~ Jeff Beck to Yardbirds

“Cause he's FREE!”

~ Alfredo "Don" Corlione explaining why he chose Jeff Beck over Pete Townsend to smash his guitar in the cult stinker "Blowjob"

The Yardbirds were a musical group of ex-convicts (hence the name) from the USA State of Queenland (Species: TooCool4ArtSchool-sapiens) who are mainly noted for launching the careers of the "Super Three" or the three greatest BASS players in history, viz., Paul S. Smith, Jimmi Page and Chris Dreja, aka "The Bass Gods". In spite of guitar interference the band managed to record some hits. Unfortunately the band was forced out of business when the guitar interference grew too sever. In an effort to save the band the members checked into the Mickie Most rehabilitation clinic, but Most deemed them to be Rockula and pounded a commercial nail through their hearts. They are credited with starting hippie music by accident. But, really, their primary contribution was giving birth to GOD (also see Eric Clapton). The Yardbirds are the only band ever founded who are considered eternal founders of Yardbirdism which transmutated into "Psychedelic Music." It is a scientific FACT that God likes "Shapes of Things" by the Yardbirds (while mere mortals prefer "Happenings").

[edit] Trivia:

Singer Keith Relf was not electrocuted playing guitar in a bath tub, it was a harmonica.
Like, Jeff Beck invented the lead guitar solo. Dude!
According to the Yardbirds feedback and distortion are GOOD.
Keith Relf was the first person to sing "I'm A Man" like a women.
The band appeared in the movie "Blowjob" featuring three bass players at once.
When a Yardbird's song is played backwards you can hear parts of the Dead Sea Scrolls recited by Cheech Marin in "Hip-speak".
Drummer Jim iMac has the numbers "999" (sign of God) tatooed on his left buttox.
The Yardbirds are non-different from Illuminati.
The existence of the music proves the Yardbird's are NOT a myth (Exhibit A: Music)
Scientologists and theocrats are uncertain how the Universe came into existence prior to the birth of God Aka "Snail-hand" Eric Clapton.
The Yardbirds are the only band in history to never earn even one full pound.
The Yardbirds are considered by many to be the "Best Band in, like, the history of the Solar System."

Mathematical History of The Yardbirds:

[edit] Famous Quotes

"I'll wear a bleedin' bird cage on me head with a parrot on a perch shoutin' 'fuck off!'"---Jeff Beck in 1967 describing his relationship with the fans at the next gig - to Misunderstood singer, Rick Brown.
"What do you bloody mean, 'No lead guitar' in For Your Luv?"---Eric Clapton (also see God)
"Thomas Edison MIGHT have discovered electricity, or gravity, or whatever; but I discovered feedback"---Jeff Beck
"Man who no dig Yardbirds is velly bad!"---Ho Chi Minh
"Good morning little school girl!"---Keith Relf
"You're FIRED!" Band to Jeff Beck
"I QUIT!" Jeff Beck to Band
"You don't need money! No, no, no!"---Band to the World
"You don't need money! No, no, no!"---Manager to the Band
"I did it my way!"---Eric Clapton to George Harrison
"I ran out of frets!"---Beck explaining why he devolved into noise at the end of I'm a Man.
"Why did I make you do that!?"---Jeff Beck to Keith Relf after smashing his harmonica.
"Cause he's FREE!"---Alfredo "Don" Corlione explaining why he chose Jeff Beck over Pete Townsend to smash his guitar in the cult stinker "Blowjob".
"We have a love-hate relationship. I love him, he hates me."---Jeff Beck on Rod Stewart
"Layla! You got me on my knees!"---Eric Clapton publicly proposing to George Harrison's wife, Patti Boyd.
"Someone said I should be proud tonight; and I bloody-well am! Because I kicked them out. Fuck me!"---Jeff Beck speaking at the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame induction of The Yardbirds
"It's the 11th Commandment!"---Chris Dreja explaining the religious significance of the song, "Mr. You're a Better Man Than I!" to Hustler Magazine.
"Shapes of Things! Of course!!"---God revealing His favorite all-time (eternal) lead-guitar solo, during an interview with Christian Science Monitor Magazine.