The kooks

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The Kooks are are a brilliant indie-pop band, achieving major chart success in the mid-2000's thanks to the singers inability to correctly pronounce the bulk of the words in the English language.

“How did anyone ever get me confused for The Kooks anyway?”

~ Jack Johnson on The Kooks

“It was better when this page was about Jack Johnson, really.”

~ Luke Kook on This page

[edit] A Brief History

The Kooks emerged from the new wave of multi-untalented British indie bands, sacrificing musical talent for, well, not a lot really. Apart from bad hair. Bad hair is the one thing that's definitely come up trumps, the lead singer sporting a barnet that only Amy Winehouse can compete with in terms of it's buttock-clenching awfulness. His terrible fashion sense must spring from some major kind of inadequacy, there couldn't be any other justifiable reason for dressing like a model for clothes that even the 80's rejected as "tasteless".

[edit] Musical Influences and style

To their credit, there is at least some attempt at melody. This is quickly forgotten though, because you'll be too busy trying to cut your ears out after hearing the singer go, "Hi nu, She nuus, Hii'm not fund uf uskin." Eh? This of course is taken from their hit "Nuaive". Other hits from their first album include "She moves in hur own way", a bizarre take on an alternative version of Ben Hur, where the lead character was a cross-dresser who couldn't pronounce the letter "e" properly, and a host of other gargantuan efforts, including "Ooh La", a clear nod to their idol and greatest influence Coolio (remember him)?

[edit] Wonk

To the delight of the world and particularly radical Islamic cleric Abu Hamza, The Kooks released their second album in 2008, called "Wonk". The first single was the eponymous "Always where I need to be", a self deprecating reference to the amount of time the lead singer spends at home without bothering the rest of us with his terrible hair and clothes. A definite departure from their earlier work, Wonk takes on a much more spiritual dimension, including a reworking of the old Christian classic, "Shine, Jesus, Shine" (retitled as "Shine on" to avoid being labelled as "too Christian"). The album will no doubt supply us with an endless amount of instant classics, in much the same way that several polaroid photographs of flaccid penises do.

[edit] Singles

You dont fuck me (the way that i fuck you)

Stop being so fucking Naive (bitch)

She moves, talks, sings, dances, shags, craps, kicks, hits, pises and laugh's in her own way

ooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh la!

Seaside (a song inspired by the bands trip to Weston Super Mare, the sunniest place in the world)

Always were i need to be (when my ex-wife is angry)

Shine on (a song based around Britney Spears)

[edit] Conclusion

It is important to note that they aren't affiliated with Jack Johnson, though they wish they were. At least they're better than Mark Ronson.