Tom Osborne

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Him

whoever writes this shit is a retard.....

whoever takes the time to edit a page that they are never going to visit again to announce that they think that whoever it is who writes the quotes is a retard, is an even bigger retard.

Tom "The Shit" Osborne was born in 1937 in (Hastings). Scholars have never heard of this place, many believe that this holy site was created by God for his second son Tom Osborne. Much like the Garden of Eden it doesn't not exist anymore, and cannot be found because it is a corn field in nebraska. Tom Osborne quickly gained power in the state. Through out his 1973-1997 career at the University of Nebraska, Tom had a 255-49-3 record. Tom was so great that his shrine, Memorial Stadium, has 81,000 worshippers.

Tom, however tried to enter a new realm that he had never entered before. Politics. Tom was the representative for the 3rd Congressional District in Nebraska, he won by a land slide, stealing all 17 votes. Tom however pushed his luck to far and ran for Governor, losing to fellow republican Dave Heineman. It is unclear as to why the people would not vote their god into office, however everyone knows how trustworthy electronic voting machines are.

1 Tom's Wrath
2 Tom's Successor
3 Bo Pelini
4 Tom's Disciples
5 Additional Information

[edit] Tom's Wrath

Many believe that God spoke to Tom and told him to kick the ass of all who are evil. With God's army at his side the '95 Huskers or more commonly know as "God's Gift to Football", he destroyed four of the top ten teams and won by an average of 31 points per game. Tommie Frazier stepped on top of the Gators in the National Championship. Tom won his way to three national championships (1994, 1995, 1997), and 13 conference championships.

Tom however was cheated out of the national titles in 1981, 1983, 1984, and 1993.
In the 1983 championship, Tom tied the game with a touchdown instead of kicking the extra point, Tom went for two and didn't get it because his player dropped the pass. Some may call this a mistake going for the win, but his decision took balls, huge balls.

[edit] Tom's Successor

The Devil

Tom's Successor, hand-chosen by Tom, was Frank Solich. However, much like Judas, Frank Solich betrayed Tom, and was out to distroy his legacy. Although Frank Solich was a good leader, he was unable to bring new players to his team. We soon found out the Frank was not the Second coming of Tom, but rather Satan, out to destroy his work. Frank was described as an odd mix of Helen Keller and Hitler. He was out to kill all of Tom's program and players and didn't care how he did it, and was blind and deaf to the fact that he could be fired from his position. Soon all Nebraska fans called for his firing and Steve Peterson, stripped Frank of his position.

Frank was stopped, and was replaced by a questionable, Bill Callahan, who told of a strange future known as "West Coast" offense. Bill is able to draw recruits to the god-like Husker army like none other. Bill however tried to pull a 180 on the tradition, changing the tunnel walk and isolating former players. He too was stopped when Tom Osborne came in a the Athletic Director. Now Bo Pelini will take over the Husker Nation.

[edit] Bo Pelini

Bo "Manly Man" Pelini

After Tom returned to his throne, he lead a successful coup d'etat to overthrow Bill "pussy-fuck" Callahan, and he was replaced by the NCAA-Record holder for "Highest Percentage of Wins" as a head coach at 100%. Bo made the wise decision to leave LSU and come to Nebraska and he will try and re-build God's Gift to Football, but it may be a challenge because "Pussy-Fuck", and "Hitler-Keller" have brought the program to its knees and left its mouth wide open. Bo Pelini may look funny but he is a man, and that is what Nebraska needs most, a manly man.