Tom and Jerry
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Tom (2000 B.C.-2006 A.D.) Jerry (1999 B.C.-2006 A.D.)
Tom and Jerry were known as the greatest duo of all time. They were the first entertainment duo ever since Moses and Aaron.
Their official start was in Egypt after The Great Plague. Tom was entertaining Pharaoh while Jerry was eating fruit. Tom nearly broke his tail and starting chasing Jerry around the Palace. Since Egyptians were cat-worshipers, they loved Tom and they wanted Jerry to be part of the duo.
1000 years later, when Greece came and poured grease all over Egypt, they took Tom and Jerry over to Greece so that they could become love-slaves to Venus. But Tom broker her arms and Tom went to Hades for 7 years. After Alexander conquered Greece for himself, he brought back Tom out of Hades and Tom and Jerry were reunited.
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[edit] Catholic Ages
Tom and Jerry had a great fame until the Fall of The Roman Empire. The new leader burned Tom because he was a Witch. So for revenge, Jerry ate contaminated mushrooms and brought The Black Plague on Europe.
[edit] Renaissance
In 1300's Dante walked into Hell and brought Tom back from the dead. Tom coughed up a big Hairball and The Black Plague ended. But it wasn't until 1517 when Martin Luther made Tom a conqueror of the Thirty Years War.
In 1620, Tom and Jerry took their show to America. Along with them were The poet, the farmer, the magician, the scientist, the physician, and the so-called other Gods.
In 1629, Tom was fined for chasing mice on Sundays. And the Pilgrims called him a witch. They Crucified Tom for his crime and went back to hell.
[edit] 4th Life
In 1776, George Washington declared war against Britain and Tom came back as a Redcoat by air. Paul Revere killed Tom with his horse. And Tom returned to Hell again.
[edit] 5th Life
In 1865, Jerry lived in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania with Abraham Lincoln. Tom attempted to kill Lincoln at Henry Ford's Theater when Lincoln was watching the play Cars. It was there when John Wilkes Booth killed Tom, thinking that he was the President.
[edit] 6th Life
In 1881, there was a quarrel between Tom and James Garfield. Jerry killed Tom and badly wounded Garfield who died two years later.
[edit] 7th Life
In 1901 at the Shriners Convention in Buffalo, where a Polish Guy wounded McKinnley. But it was when Tom and Jerry did a Minstrel Show that Kanye West shot Tom and William McKinnley. McKinnley was recovered, but Tom didn't.
[edit] 8th Life
In 1963, the day before The Beatles came to America, John F. Kennedy was in Dallas. This time, it was Tom who was the killer. He shot JFK and Martin Luther King at the same time. The next day, he was in Soviet Union giving the Egg Salad recipe to Boris and Natasha. That was when Hitler shot Tom for being a Communist.
[edit] Final Life
In 2006, Tom and Jerry got busted in London for smoking opium in front of the children. Mammy saw all this and called the police to arrest them for encouraging children to smoke especially on Television.
On December 2006, Tom and Jerry were killed in a smoking room. Their legacy of their cartoons are now banned from the airwaves because of their racist remarks, usage of smoking, drinking, using drugs, painting graffiti and sex.
Tom got ressurrected by a voodoo master along with Saddam and was last seen shaking his furry butt at a male strip club.
Jerry got cloned by Aisan scientists and he stole one of their rocketships and went to venus.
[edit] Nowday
Tom is in work for Saddam Hussein in New York City so they can take over the paradise with chemical weapon. Jerry is living on venus, because he heard Venus is "Hot" (many hot chicks) but in fact it is "hot" (very very warm). he have no money anymore, and have not even afford to move to Ganymedes.
In 2008, Iran has threatened Tom and Jerry because it made Jews look good. But Mel Brooks said that Iran never looked better in Hollywood.
