Turd on a tractor
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Turd on a tractor is one of the most well known poo related phrases with over four-hundred trillion people knowing and using it frequently just in Europe. It is most commonly used in the place of 'Shit' when the speaker is inflicted with any kind of pain, usually involving a dog or a football to the groin. Some celebrities have been reported to have said this phrase, including billy the farmer, spearman jim (he's roman) and the big dog out of beethoven, not to be confused with the famous female sumo wrestle Gavin Beethoven. Although the phrase is not widely used in America, it is used by many canadians and brazilians who of most are either elderly or own a dog.
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[edit] History
The Turd on the Tractor phrase and merchandising chain was patented in 222AD, by Harolf the Ganger who was brought to fame recently as being the oldest man to have ever lived, at around 1800 years of age and by having the longest pubes and saggiest breasts in British history and closely losing out in the Worlds strongest Man competition. The company made millions with the famous phrase 'If it aint on a tractor, its not a real turd' and the huge media advertising campain. He later relased the famous song called 'Love me' and 'Whiningmotherfuckerpussyassbitches', both can be downloaded from itunes at 79p each. In 1823 the 'Ganger', at the lively age of 1603 changed the company name to WALMART after complaints from the education secretary who said:
' Your company has a terrific name '
Harsh but fair.
WALMART made 40000000 stores in Uzbekistan alone and sold high quality food at competetive prices.
[edit] Other Phrases
Some phrases that have become almost as funny as this one are:
- Poo on a motherfucking platapus' face
- Diarraea on Dry balls ( also a song )
- Shit on a stick ( very popular for a while, but people quickly lost interest )
- ...and the highly contraversial Turd on a toothbrush, of which every sayer through the 1600's was hanged as the old patent stated no four word phrase containing the words 'Turd on a' shall be spoken.
[edit] Thank You
So, if you own a tractor (or a turd), try and use this phrase whenever you can, impress all the other farmers before calling them 'Welsh Sheep Fuckers' of which i will make an article on soon.
I think i have pretty much summed up this phrase and i just wanted to say how sorry i am for not doing it sooner and would personally like to apologise to the whole of Uncyclopedia for not bringing them one of the most popular phrases ever known to man.
