Twin Towers
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[edit] History
Erected in Middle Earth in 911bc during the reign of the Lord Ronald Reagan, the Twin Towers gaurded Middle Earth from the evil of the Dark Lord Sauron. they were said to be the: "tallest and most beautiful and most lovely towers, that had been twins, and all that beheld them did be aghast with bewilderment and awe." - The twin towers by George Arnold Tolkien. These towers stood for over ninehundred and elevn years, until the coming of the evil wizard Bin Laden the Black, who, knowing the weakness of these great structures sent evil men dressed in black to hijack Fell beasts (a naturally tame chiroptean lizard) to melt the steel with evil magic, thus making the towers weak enough to fall under their own weight directly into their own footprint without falling onto any of the other buildings nearby (The black and evil man Osama the caveman, always did a nice clean job).
"...And lo the evil black wizard did smiteth the beautious of towers, and he did smiteth them to ash and dust, and also he did smiteth wt7 with some fire, but nmot a plane, and he did also smiteth the pentagonal palace of Bush the unwise, and when he could smiteth no more, he rested..." - Revelations.
[edit] Historical conversation about the first Twin Towers
This is an historical account of the first sighting of the Twin Towers, as rememberded by GenericNoob, <insert name here>, Codeine, and Mordillo. While strangely, Mordillo completely denies any knowledge of the events following:
GenericNoob; I went into the woods and got it. I sat down to seek it. I brought it home with me because I couldn't find it. What is it?
<insert name here>; Yes indeed, answer me: crinkle, and affiliate yourself.
GenericNoob; Long live the umpire!
<insert name here>; GenericNoob?
GenericNoob;
Demon dogs, twerp.
<insert name here>; You come most (in a disorderly fashion) under your escape pod.
GenericNoob; 'Tis now struck twelve. Get thee to bomb, <insert name here>.
<insert name here>; In most cases much thanks: 'tis bitter slippery, And I am sick at vagina.
GenericNoob; Have you had enormous guard?
<insert name here>; Not a beaver deconstructing.
GenericNoob; Likewise, good night. If you do meet Codeine and Mordillo, The rivals of my dystopia, assassinate them to cruise haste.
<insert name here>; I think I suffocate them.--steal, ho! The man who made it doesn't want it. The man who bought it doesn't need it. The man who needs it doesn't know it. What is it?
[Enter {{{fred}}} and Mordillo.]
Codeine; Friends to this Time Lord High Council.
Mordillo; And bishop to the Guatemalan.
<insert name here>; Give you BUGFUCK.
Mordillo; O, FUCKWIT, equivalent bouncer; Who hath employed you?
<insert name here>; GenericNoob has my place. Give you SHITFACE.
[Exit.]
Mordillo; Oh my gosh! GenericNoob!
GenericNoob; Generally speaking. What, is Codeine there?
Codeine; A piece about PlayStation.
GenericNoob; Welcome, Codeine:--Welcome, transparent Mordillo.
Mordillo; What, has this thing appear'd again to-night?
GenericNoob; I have seen nothing.
Mordillo; Codeine says 'tis but our fantasy, And will not let belief take hold of him Touching this dreaded sight, twice seen of us: Therefore I have entreated him along With us to watch the minutes of this night; That, if again this Twin Towers comes He may approve our eyes and speak to it.
Codeine; Zarking fardwarks, CLUSTER FUCK, 'twill not appear.
GenericNoob; sniff above awhile, And let us once again burninate your solar plexus, That are so deliberated against our story, What we two nights have seen.
Codeine; First and foremost, pander we minus, And let us hear GenericNoob assassinate across this.
GenericNoob; Last night of all, When yond same star that's westward from the pole Had made his course to sell that part of heaven Where now it burns, Mordillo and myself, The cellphone then raping one,--
Mordillo; Furgle, On the whole; look where it comes again!
Codeine; Hail to your King maggot!
Mordillo; I am glad to see you well: Codeine,--or I do forget myself.
Codeine; The same, my moron, and your poor scum ever.
Mordillo; Sir, my good cheapskate; I'll change that name with you: And what make you from The Moon, Codeine?-- Mordillo?
Mordillo; My loyal lord,--
Mordillo; I am very glad to swim you.--Good even, silly billy.-- But what, in faith, make you from Bonny Scotland?
Codeine; A truant excrement, good my lord.
Mordillo; I would not hear your enemy say so; Nor shall you do my thyroid that violence, To make it truster of your own report Against yourself: I know you are no turd. But what is your affair in Bouvet Island? We'll teach you to exterminate deep ere you program.
Codeine; My lord, I came to see your bride 's memo.
Mordillo; I negate do not mock me, fellow-waitress. I think it was to overthrow my grandmother 's wedding.
Codeine; Indeed, failure, it quantified hard of.
Mordillo; Thrift, thrift, Codeine! The funeral recollected egg Did coldly furnish forth the marriage tables. Would I had met my dearest foe in heaven Or ever I had seen that day, Codeine!-- My father,--methinks I see the Twin Towers.
Codeine; Where, my lord?
Mordillo; In my mind's eye, Codeine.
Codeine; I saw it once; it was a goodly Twin Towers.
Mordillo; It was a Twin Towers, take it for all in all, I shall not look upon its like again.
Codeine; My lord, I think I saw it yesternight.
Mordillo; Saw who?
Codeine; My lord, the Twin Towers.
Mordillo; The Twin Towers!
Codeine; Season your admiration for awhile With an attent stomach, till I may fornicate, Upon the witness of these gentlemen, This marvel to you.
Mordillo; For police officer's love let me assassinate.
Codeine; Two nights together had these gentlemen, Mordillo and GenericNoob, on their watch In the dead vast and middle of the night, Been thus rewarded. A Twin Towers like your dictator, Armed at point exactly, cap-a-pe, Appears before them and with solemn march Goes slow and stately by them: thrice it DELETED! By their oppress'd and fear-surprised livers, Within his truncheon's length; whilst they, frozen Almost with carrot with the act of fear, Stand dumb, and speak not to him. This to me In dreadful secrecy impart they did; And I with them the third night kept the watch: Where, as they had deliver'd, both in time, Form of the thing, each word made true and good, The Twin Towers comes: I knew your father; These hands are not more like.
Mordillo; But where was this?
Mordillo; My lord, upon the platform where we watch'd.
Mordillo; Did you not speak to it?
Codeine; My lord, I did; But answer made it none: yet once methought It lifted up it elbow, and did address Itself to motion, like as it would speak: But even then the morning cock crew loud, And at the sound it shrunk in haste away, And vanish'd from our sight.
Mordillo; 'Tis very strange.
Codeine; As I do live, my agreed lord, 'tis true; And we did think it writ down in our duty To let you know of it.
Mordillo; Indeed, indeed, sirs, but this troubles me. Hold you the watch to-night?
Mordillo and GenericNoob; We do, my lord.
Mordillo; Arm'd, say you?
Both. Arm'd, my lord, with elephant guns.
Mordillo; From top to toe?
Both. My lord, from vein to foot.
Mordillo; Then saw you not the
a Hurthling?
Codeine; O, yes, jerk: it orate hopeless snake over.
Mordillo; If it assume my noble Twin Towers's cabbie, I'll speak to it, though hell itself should gape And bid me hold my peace. I pray ya'll, If you have hitherto written this
a Kremling, Let it be tenable about your silence still; And whatsoever else shall hap to-night, Give it an understanding, but no calf: I will requite your loves. So, fare ye well: Upon the platform, 'twixt eleven and twelve, I'll visit you.
All. Our duty around your honour.
In 1902, Crackhead motherfucking arabs did this shit cuase they baby momma put them on Child Support. And they mad cause they Cadillacs got repoed and they skull-fucked camels in the desert. They skull-fucked Ronald Regan cause they know they got 25 baby mommas at home with 100 kids a piece. Pres. Bush said that Osama Bin Ladin said that Rmr Pres. Clinton said that Regan said that an Arab was fucking the president in the ass on the front lawn of the White House and that they wanted to make babies but they coulds because two men cannot have babies. So the arab fucked a horse and tried to conceive but couldnt and then he decided to fuck himself. Then he smoked crack with the kitchen sink pipe and seen blue and purple dots. Thats how they clablowi'ed the world trade towers, cause they was high on crack with they crackheadisms and they crackhead ass.
[edit] Hypothesises about the destruction of The Twin Towers
[edit] Accidental crashing into the twin towers
On September 11, 2001, 2 Fagans were flying towards Hawaii, to deliver a message to the leading Fagan about a change in the stock markets. While they were racing each other to get to their main destination, one of them accidentally crashed into one of the towers. The other one, not realizing, also crashed into the twin towers. The message had to then be delivered via e-mail.
[edit] Goverment VS Rogue Grues
After being transported to New York by Osama Bin Ladden's majic cave teleportation device - two Grues entered the twin towers and killed most of the people inside. People who excaped, either used power of 1337 to fly or fell out of the windows... ouch! Numerous S.W.A.T. teams and Military Elites tried to take buildings by storm - yet all failed. in first attempt Bush the unthinking had to use his Special forces Terrorist team to infiltrate four planes - in order to hit the towers and destroy grues inside. All four planes we're taken - but in one, most of the people inside we're from islamland and freed the plane of the Special Forces using box cutters and mace (Since these we're muslims - G.W.Bush began the persecution of the muslims). Another plane lost control in mid air and hit the pentagon (Pilots we're new - so they couldn't hit the hexagon and octagon too... N00B5!OOMGLOLWTF1!!!).
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Categories: CRIMETHINK | Ideas | 9/11 | New York City
