UnNews:Archive/November 2007
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[edit] November 1
- Heather Mills in bloody rampage through TV studio
- Meatloaf forced to cancel gig for "doing that"
- Met police ticketed for "disrupting traffic" in Menezes killing
[edit] November 2
- Astronomic mass case baffles Chile
- Ireland expectedly lowers drinking age to 4
- Lindsay Lohan in "lip transplant" controversy
- Monkey replaces George W. Bush as president; Americans notice improvement
- Saying Crisis is Imminent, Penmanship Instructors Make Case to Congress
[edit] November 3
- Hillary Drops Presidental Bid
- My son makes the play of the game
- Turkeys press rice into gorillas in bizarre tribal custom
[edit] November 4
- Bush declares "Mission Accomplished" in War on E. coli
- Hurricane Noel goes missing in Bermuda Triangle
- Single guy gets a tax cut, says he'll spend it on porn
- State of Emergency declared in Pakistan, all political assassinations to be suspended
[edit] November 5
- "So brave" Community Support Officers hide behind a tree and "take notes" as man is butchered to death
- Snickers launches new advertising campaign
- Writer's Strike means no new TV shows
[edit] November 6
- Candy Meth is the new Pespi
- Engineers experimenting with Kool-Aid as a source of fuel for rockets
- Lost Dog Saved by Bacon Roll
- Militant atheist violence continues
- Uncyclopedia writers go on strike
- Woof! Looking at big bouncing boobs "make you brainy"
[edit] November 7
- Bush had Sex and Didn't Realize it
- Chile Caught Smuggling Chili Powder
- New movie sequel announced: Snakes on a Bus
- Wikipedia Names Man of the Year
- Zordon announces candidacy for President
[edit] November 8
- I Can't Believe It's Not Communism! is recalled for containing Communism
- Labor's new campaign: A new line of shirts
- Ravers run toystores for Aqua Dots
- Uncyclomedia finially reaches goal!
[edit] November 9
- Cheney gets attacked by Quails
- In response to Chinese construction of world's largest ferris wheel, United States commissions construction of world's largest strip pole
- Price of Cocaine Feeling Effects of Higher Gas Prices
- U.S. Dollar falls below WoW Gold
[edit] November 10
- Astronomers discover most Earth-like planet yet
- Europe invades the iPhone
- Ick, broccoli for dinner, AGAIN!
- Local guitarist uncovers hidden music in Da Vinci's 'Last Supper'
[edit] November 11
[edit] November 12
[edit] November 13
- Bird Flu found in UK man
- NSA bored with your conversations
- New blow for Britney as she 'fails' spelling test
- Schwarzenegger aims to end Uncyclopedia strike "with my Uzi 9mm"
[edit] November 14
- Massacre of 14 Iraqi civilians was result of harmless 'high jinks', says FBI
- NY plays on halt due to Strike
- Police apologize for random shooting, blame it on "too much Grand Theft Auto"
- Spain suspended after row between powers
- Terrorist plans to cause building evacuations and flight delays are working
[edit] November 15
[edit] November 16
- Congressman Defends Legalized Assault Rifles States "Traffic has never been better!".
- Surfer dude stuns physicists with theory of everything
[edit] November 17
[edit] November 18
- Amy Winehouse turns up to concert sober, fans disappointed
- Iraqi attacks down 55%; Bush wants $200bn to celebrate
- Kid's DS is Stolen
- Ohio family looks forward to celebrating WASP Thanksgiving
- Romania's horse and cart crackdown
- Uncyclopedia is finished
[edit] November 19
- 2,000 "obese" people to be culled in move to cut benefit costs
- Guy Gets Crazy
- TV's Mr. Whipple dies of ass cancer
- Writers' strike expands to the interweb
[edit] November 20
- Mr. Whipple squeezes Charmin, dies at 91
- Non-disabled Americans fight for equal rights, parking privileges
- Pope divides disputed Moon between China and Japan
[edit] November 21
- Against all odds Conservapedia celebrates its first birthday
- Bighorn sheep collared
- Courier who lost UK population data: "it honest mistake yes?"
- Great Maple Tree Dies
- Millions 'accidentally' put on Mafia Hitlist by incompetent UK government officials
[edit] November 22
- Darling rubbishes English economy crash
- Man charged with worst littering crime in history
- Man has sex with bicycle, escapes prosecution
- Manhattan teen on suicide watch
- McLeish Keen On England Position
- Media rekindles Natalee Holloway investigation
- Mr. Agdwgdwgwango found responsible of stealing two disks with the bank details of 25 million people.
- New poll shows that UFOs are boring
[edit] November 23
- Bush breaks tradition, doesn't pardon Thanksgiving turkey
- Living May Be Dangerous To Your Health, Say Experts
- Ohio family completes celebration of WASP Thanksgiving
[edit] November 24
- Final Frontier medicine takes a Sicilian turn
- Math broken, Universe in chaos
- Mosque comments taken out of context
- Sesame Street rated X
- Six more discs 'are missing'
- Study: Dial-up better than Broadband, DSL
- White shoppers turned away from Black Friday deals
[edit] November 25
- Italian loser buys Texas town, seller is amused
- Pope makes Irish primate new cardinal
- Rock Singer placed on Injured Reserve
- Selma Hayek: "My breasts are God's gifts to men"
- UnNews Sunday Magazine November 25, 2007
[edit] November 26
- Being "blonde" may be catching
- High court rules:It's still rape even if you shout surprise
- Kasparov jailed for beating Putin at chess
- Man accuses media of overhyping everything; accusation may lead to World War III
- Outrage as GMTV uses hard core live pornographic show to 'model' thermal socks
[edit] November 27
- Greyhound racing 'needs change'
- Israel makes a big "Fuck you" to Nazis by making large Israeli flag
- Latest 'matyr' of bicycle hardxcore sex cult jailed for life following nationwide manhunt
- Seagull in court on robbery and terrorism charges
- Sudan holds British teacher for "having fun" with her pupils
- Zara reveals that it is sypathetitic to Nazisim
[edit] November 28
- Community Support Officer in "courageous" stand against unruly carol singers
- Dead Quiet Riot members announce partial reunion
- Microsoft buys Switzerland
- Russian man blows self up after train inspectors notice porn magazines
[edit] November 29
- 57% increase in crass articles on Uncyclopedia after announcement of annual Aristocrat's Turkey Day Ball
- Fears film may spark fresh wave of deicides
- Gran Turismo 5 to include carbon-offset option
- Iraq detainees suffering from 'excessive boredom'
- NASA unveils detailed map of Antarctica, lost city "suspiciously obscured by clouds"
- US police file "false beard" ban lawsuit
