UnNews:Fox News declares war on Rap

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14 April 2007

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NEW YORK -- Fox News, suffering a steady decline of ratings, following it's live coverage of Don Imus in bed, has stated that Rap is to blame for World's problems. In a news conference, Fox News president, Bill O'Reilly released a statement:

"Rap, you have screwed with me for the last time," O'Reilly said. According to Bill O'Reilly's secretary, he thinks Rap is a person.

"He'll rant on and on about the day he will meet Mr. Rap. He doesn't know what to do. He really has me worried," O'Reilly's secretary said.

It's a nuclear bomb. Seriously, your looking at it. Right in front of you...yes, the picture.

According to UnNews insider, Alan Colmes, O'Reilly has ordered a declaration of war against Mr. Raps regime, CNN. Colmes has also uncovered a picture of a Nuclear bomb on O'Reilly's computer, along with instructions. According to the instructions, O'Reilly plans on sending the picture, via email, to the suspected "Mr. Rap," who actually turns out to be city of Atlanta mayor, Hillary Clinton. O'Reilly is hoping to detonate the picture within Clinton's computer. After the confirmation of O'Reilly's plan, President Bush has declared war on O'Reilly for possessing the supposed weapons of mass destruction.