Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/April 11
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April 11: National Backwards Helmet Day International 'I Drink Your Milkshake' Day
- 2 - Chuck Norris is born to Marry and Joseph, but the J-Man came around and zaped his cowboy ass to the 20th century.
- 48 - Holy Belly Button Lint discovered in ditch near Golgotha.
- 641 - Sliced bread invented.
- 642 - Toast invented.
- 643 - First slice of buttered toast dropped on floor.
- 644 - Inventor of Toast and Sliced Bread is burned at the stake for Heresy and Witchcraft.
- 1492 - First slice of jelly bread thrown into someone's face.
- 1493 - First execution for accidentally throwing a slice of jelly bread into the face of the King
- 1667 - The blind, impoverished John Milton sells the copyright of Paradise Lost for £10 and buys a Milkshake.
- 1667 - On his way home John Milton is robbed; while lying devastated on the ground he heard the robber shouting victoriously "I Drink Your Milkshake!" while running away.
- 1775 - Germany runs out of people to accuse of witchcraft and execute, and begins brainstorming on who to meaninglessly kill next.
- 1904 - Albert Einstein discovers that he's related to his sister
- 1905 - Einstein publishes a book about his relation and relationship with his sister and subsequently wins the Nobel prize.
- 1965 - Sharon Stone turns 60.
- 1969 - Satan invents Disco
- 1984 - Mr. Rogers flips out and assassinates the Thomas the Tank Engine.
- 1999 - Rain of Tears memorial, mass suicides after first showing of Gigli
- 2004 - Jesus Christ reborn in Nigeria, attempts to reach out to acquaintances throughout the world by email, disastrously mistranslates himself as "King of Nigeria".
- 2005 - sdrawkcaB is invented to make the celebration of the holiday possible.
- 2008 - Bill Gates is trying to copyright the horn of a telephone, to annoy Apple's PhonePod.
- Long Time Ago, In a Galaxy Far, Far Away - Death Star is destroyed in a Terrorist Attack. Emperor Palpatine III has sworn to eliminate the terrorist threat one by one.
- 2009 - Somebody who actually cares for this holiday puts his helmet on backwards. His bike is immediately stolen because he can't see.
