Uncyclopedia:Anniversaries/June 4
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June 4: International Deserved Child Abuse Victim Day and the Day of the Tank Man
- 1452 - Christopher Columbus outvoted on naming the Santa Maria, "The Shitbag."
- 1776 - Thomas Jefferson asks for first two-week extension on Declaration of Independence.
- 1863 - Rain causes International Celebrate Yesterday day to be put off until next day, mass confusion results.
- 1900 - John Jefferson of Oak Ridge, PA awakes from forty-year sleep. Dies of asphyxiation inside coffin.
- 1920 - The King of Hungary is split into five pieces and slow roasted at the BBQ of Trianon in Paris.
- 1942 - The Battle of Midway begins with a surprise attack on Konami.
- 1958 - Centerville very briefly experiences an alien invasion, which lasts for five minutes. The aliens are scared off by the towns' boring reputation.
- 1976 - Americans celebrate bicentennial of Thomas Jefferson asking for his first two-week extension on the declaration of Independence.
- 1980 - Every child abuse offender was released in Texas due to prison-overcrowding.
- 1989 - The Tiananmen Square Massacre (Editors note: China is trying dead hard to deny this but we at Uncyclopedia and nearly all western sapients and dinosaurs know dead easily that once it's happened, it's happened... Same goes for the Orangutans.)
- 2002 - God made an official apology for the creation of PETA and the birth of George Bush, but we forgive him because he created JFK.
- 2004 - Earth's second moon discovered. Scientists name it "Moon 2.0" in a flash of creative inspiration.
- 2007 - God made an official apology for the creation of controversial DRM system SecuROM, but this time we didn't forgive him because it at the time many thought doing so wouldn't solve anything.
