Uncyclopedia:DYK submissions

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

This is where you can submit Did You Know entries. List your submission(s) below, and if the admins decide it's worthwhile, it will be added to the main page template. You can sign your submissions if you want.

Q: Why is DYK now locked?
A: Because when it was freely editable, the admins felt it was repetitive, unfunny, got way too huge, and was too time-consuming for the admins to manage.

Q: When will my submission appear?
A: When an admin decides that it's good enough for the front page. A warning: DYK is low priority for most admins. It may not be updated with new submissions frequently, and many entries will be deleted without making it to the main template. Here's how to maximize your chances:

Search the current DYKs and make sure yours isn't a repeat. No, "...that 74.6% of statistics are made up" won't cut it, sorry. You can press Ctrl+F to search some keywords.
Link to good pages in your DYK.
Sequence DYKs (i.e. using two or three or four indented entries for one DYK) are allowed, but don't go overboard.
DO SOMETHING ORIGINAL. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF SOPHIA, BE ORIGINAL.

Q: What is the template format?
A: All the DYKs are thrown into a random blender using the <choose> tags. That means only one (or a few) DYK will appear on the front page each time you load the page. So no, your DYK will not automagically appear after it's accepted.

Q: What about "Do You Care"?
A: Do You Care entries are mainly for highlighting great past articles.

[edit] A list of really, really intelligent DYKs that you really, really should submit

Admins are cute, cuddly, sexy, helpful,good looking, can purr, kind to new users.
Russian Reversals.
American Reversals
Celebrity facts.
The complete lyrics of the song "Still Alive" with "...that" inserted at the beginning of each line.
The incomplete lyrics to any song, ever.
The word "Slayer" spelled with more than 6 letters.
......that coryn Maccuallagh is an emo fag

"...that Santa Claus is real?"

...You can easily hide you're children in the trunk of the new, Renault McCann?
"...this?"
"...that I have no idea what i'm talking about? ...What?
"...that?"
"...well did you?"
"...the Muffin Man?"
"...that you are ugly and I am smart? Idiot!"
"...that the cake is a lie?"
"...that the proof is in the pudding?"
"...that your mom?"
"...that you can, in fact, touch this?"
"...that I am your father?"
"...that there are 10 kinds of people in the world? Those that know binary and those that don't."
"...I'll be back"
"...that 87% of statistics are made up?"
"...that you just lost The Game?"
"...that Carole King's smash hit "The Locomotion" is about her love of giving hand-jobs. The original words were "...cum on , baby, do the lotion motion!"
"... that short bus jokes aren't actually funny, and when people use them in public, they're really saying "Please ignore me because I am unfunny and lame"? "
"... that I know that you know that I still know about that time you said you knew, when actually, I knew, and everyone thought you knew and I didn't? Yeah? I still do. Drive home safely."
... that pudding is actually 10% potato skin, and the other 90% is that wierd shit you get on the inside of your cheeks when you eat old spaghetti?"
"...that a generic amount of people do a generic group activity every day?"
"...that only you can prevent forest fires?"
"...that one chick, Debbie? Yeah, we went out to a movie last night, good one actually, it was that one, uhhh, I think it was called, "The Dog Dies at the End." But anyway, during the movie I tried to put my moves on her and well, it didn't work so well. Man, you should have been there, I could have used a wingman."
"...that dislexia can skrite at yan mite?"
"... that the did you know section was created to teach you how to recycle."

[edit] Were You Aware Of It?

...that traffic wardens need love?
...that with a series of simple reasonings you can actually use Occam's Razor as a disposable shaver?
...that reading uncyclopedia its considered a crime in most Asian countries?
...that whenever you misspell something, a puppy dies? Better watch out.
...that Chuck Norris once decided to put his urine in cans and sell it as an energy drink? Its now known as Red Bull
...that Chuck Norris is the only one who can slam a revolving door?
...that there is no endangered species list, only a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live?
...that Chuck Norris once went back in time and roundhouse kicked Albert Einstein in the face? He's is now known as Stephen Hawking.
...that death has a new name ... and that name is Chuck Norris?
...that roughly 100% of teenagers are aged 13 to 19?
...that for every three immigrants that enter the United States, ten enter?

¿ɐuıɥƆ ɯoɹɟ sıɥʇ ƃuıdʎʇ ɯ,I ʇɐɥʇ˙˙˙.

...that Jimmy Patterson is coming to get you?
...that Chuck Norris got bored of the dinosaurs, he roundhouse kicked the world, disguising it as an asteroid?
...that Chuck Norris is always on top, because Chuck Norris never fucks up?
...that cats are known to set up us the bomb and are therefore very dangerous pets?
...that,you can read.
...that, despite the substantial monetary gain, robbing a bank is totally not cool?
...that Admins are really, cute, sexy, helpful, can purr, love new users.
...that Oedipus is a mother fucker?
...that OF COURSE I wouldn't jump off a bridge even if Tim did it? I may be impressionable, but I'm not stupid.
...that this is a DIY-DYK? Write your own funny quip and/or 'fact' in the space provided.
...that I have, in fact, had the time of my life?
...that I have never felt this way before?
...that I swear, it's true?
...that I owe it all to you?

__________________________________________________________________

...that eating Chalk isn't Just for Breakfast, anymore?
...that there has been a recent discovery of Another 'Show, Like Show Business'. This adds to the list.
...that a train of eternal length never stops arriving in the station, but also never stops leaving?
...that middle school "health" classes have been proved to be complete bullshit?
...that ritual murder is looked down upon in modern society? I sure didn't.
...that it's YMCA night tonight, so I gotta go take a dump?
...that submission for DYK these days are nothing but pure bollocks?
...that if you try to take a cat apart to see how it works, the first thing you have on your hands is a nonworking cat?
...that the capital of China is C.
...that wearing a raincoat is flying around in a plane made of a raincoat?
...that messing around in a library is easy and fun, and that you should do it?
...that the constant steam of anonymous users editing all over Uncyclopedia makes me fuckingsick!?!!??
...that I'm not angry, just disgusted
- ...so was I when I met your mum
  - (All)...Oooh!
...that replacing the word 'work' with the word 'wank' leads to some interesting consequences?
...that I'm not your buddy, friend?
- ...and I'm not your friend, guy?
...that, well it isn't really that funny...
- - ...and I'm not your guy, buddy?
    - ...That I'm not Gay, boyfriend?
...That cliche jokes Joking about DYK Facts really isn't a joke anymore?
...that Chuck Norris is behind you?
...that "sharpies" are not, in fact, sharp?
...that it's better the devil you know?
...that if 'X' is true 'X is true' is also true?
- ...that if 'X is true' is true 'X is true is true' is also true?
  - ...that the above can be repeated ad infinitum?
    - ... that if 'X' is false, 'X is false' is true?
...That blatant advertising for Not So Awesome Land is okay?
...That the dreams are premonitions and the men in the coat knows what you thought?
...that if wishes were kisses we'd all have mono?
...that FDR didn't have polio, Eleanor had a wheelchair fetish.
...that SEHS can strike at any ti...
...that snow contains trace amounts of the elements hydrogen and oxygen?
...that Jesus is regarded by many as a Christ-like messianic figure?
...that even if you cut off your opponent's finger, he will still use scissors?
... that Zyklon B is the final solution to all your problems?
...that jawbreakers taste best when frozen?
...that if you pee out of a spaceship window at exactly 200.12km above the ground, your urine will enter Earth's orbit?
...that if every fat person in the world jumped on the spot five times simultaneously they might lose some weight?
...that messing around in a library is simple and fun?
...that the Discovery Channel still hasn't discovered how to make fire?
...that there are approximately 395 words in the American Heritage Toddler's Dictionary, and that George Bush used all but three in his state of the union address?
...even though half of numbers are odd, they still aren't considered normal?
...that in Canada, milk comes from cows?
... that the 'Garment Fetishism' article on wikipedia is marked with the template: This article is too much like a fansite?
... that a sailor went to sea sea sea, to see what he could see see see, but his torch ran out and his was eaten by a grue?
... that the Afghan Mujahideen were frequently confused with pirates? Even by American President Ronald Rambo.
... that pushing the big red shiny candy-like button will not really give you any satisfaction?
... that bees communicate through dancing, but that DOESN'T MAKE THEM GAY!
... that instead of cutting trees down, we should shave off the outer layers of wood. Then, we would have our wood for making furniture, and for the trees it would be like a facelift.
...that, hypothetically, anything could happen in the next five minutes?
...I' firteenf century Inglin' Dragons an' clichés roamed th' lan', smi'in' all those 'oo put on ba' accents?.
...that Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles had never seen each other?
...that the official government investigation into the assassination of JFK ultimately concluded he died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head?
...that capitalism is in fact a prank between English economists that blew out of proportion?
...that anarchy is not just for the UK?
...that 80% of the population prefers to get on the high horse than taking the high road?
...that Argentina is in fact a fictional country created by Jorge Luis Borges?
...that cannibalism is maliciously delicious?
...that cannibisalism only leaves you laughing, red-eyed and hungry for more human?
...that in Latin America gringo bueno, es gringo muerto?
...that you are the Chosen One to whom I will bestow my last Rolo?
...that Bristol, UK, is actually an island inhabited solely by students? The population of which would be nonupled if fruit flies were included in the census?
...that, in speech and writing, subject-verb agreement are very important?
...that clapping your hands is the proper conduct for expressing that you are happy and you know it?

...that Angelina Jolie Digs You

Angelina Jolie, the most attractive goddess in the history of mankind, has proclaimed that you are awesome and that if you were an African child, she'd adopt you. If you belonged to Jennifer Aniston she would steal you. You are now considered cooler than Brad Pitt and will be inducted into the People Who Angelina Jolie Digs Club.

...that using the value matrix[3] may result in a segfault because the first movie was matrix[0]?
...that Uncyclopedia is the only wiki that goes up to 11?
...that is 8th grade math?
...that the populations of many endangered species can be increased with a simple Wikipedia edit?
...that putting #REDIRECT [[Hey, what's this?]] at the top of pages blocks the "noob cookie" assigned to all new users and their pages?
...that walruses have 5 times the suction power of a dyson, and suck the brains out of seal pups through their nostrils?

...that this is actually true?

...that Lewis Hamilton went to school with Bernie Ecclestone's wife?
...that "L-M-N-O-P" is the most mispronounced part of the Alphabet Song?
...that the Proceedings of the Second International Workshop on Nude Mice of the Year 1978 proved to be inconclusive?
...that the new Wikipedian philosophical concept of Redundostupidity proved to be both stupid and redundant?
...that JFK and JR, partners in the Dallas mob, actually had a murder-suicide pact which was carried out in 1963, but JR didn't die until the '80s?

...that the above isn't true. JFK actually had nothing to do with JR; what REALLY happened was that JFK faked his own death, but there was a bullet in the rifle, kinda like what happened to Bruce Lee's son, so half of JFK's skull was blown out, but Aristotle Onassis shipped him to Lesbos to recover surrounded by beautiful lesbians, marrying Jackie as a cover, but it all failed when Lyndon Johnson's henchmen eliminated JFK in 1972, so the Warren Commission really is bullshit?

...that Oliver Stone has the right to use the above plot for a cheap political thriller in future?

... Scientology Catholicism and most religions make sense if you suspend logical thought?
...that there is always some Asian somewhere that can do whatever you are doing at any given moment better then you can.

...that he will be in the Times Educational Supplement when A-level results come out?

...that he will study medicine?

...that epistemic hermetic philosophy sucks, and really doesn't acheive anything?
...that I am the square root of -1, according to my spelling and grammar checker?
...that when you turn 60 you will immediately begin to emit the official 'old people smell', no matter how hard you scrub?
...that putting Vicks vapor rub on your eyes BURNS LIKE HELL?
...that putting salt on your skin and then putting an ice cube on that salt ALSO BURNS LIKE HELL?
...that spy sappin your sentry!
...that if you switched this website with Wikipedia no one would know the difference?
...That watching Lost makes you a looser in the same sense that watching Star Trek makes you a looser?
...that my Wooden Spoon was carved out of a bigger wooden spoon?
...that you already know this but you didn't know you knew it until you knew you knew it a minute ago?
...that every 30 seconds someone goes to the Dark Side?
...that Mother will beat you without mercy when she finds out what you did?
...that the Comedy Department in my brain is underfunded?
...that U2's lawyer works Pro Bono?
...that if you had half before, you can't have 3 times more now?
...that Bread was used as an explosive in Biblical times?
...that one, and one, Are Two. However One, being the Loneliest Number, is Probably closer related to Zero. Therefore, the math just Doesn't add up!
...You can lead a horse to water, but a Pencil is Always Lead?
...that "Hukt on Phonix", Wurks fer Mi.
...that I have a bag full of crabs that I am going to put them in my mouth and run around on market day?
...that I smoke two joints in the morning?
...I smoke two joints at night?
...I smoke two joints in the afternoon?
...It makes me feel alright?
...that if this isn't original, Sophia is going to beat the crud out of me?
...that Hugh Hefner is actually gay ?
...that the song about the man who was his own grandfather, Was Actually written by his Brother.
...that there are free discounts for women entering our breakaway mormon group in the next 20 days?
...roses are red, violets are blue, and Eric Clapton is God.
...that every time you wink, a 4 year old kid gets molested by a pedophile
...that Nerds are actually re-hydrated candy?
...that for every Drug Dealer taken off the streets, there are 30 hookers, Waiting to take his corner.
...that does who die by the hands of a serial killer never jump the queue?
...that multi-tasking is the biggest cause for unemployment?
...that reading the bible backwards reveals nothing?
...that reading the bible forwards actually is worse than reading it backwards?
...that a disproportionate amount of midgets commit suicide?
...that Rick Astley is Never Gonna Give You Up?
...that a 12 year old child is vandalizing Wikipedia articles right now?
...that there is actually a school of art called postpostmodernism?
- ...that, no, we aren't kidding?
  - ...that Wikipedia actually has an article on this stuff?
...that the truth will not set you free but will in fact, inprison you in you mind?
...that there are twice as many eyebrows in the world as there are people?
...that shaving your pubic hair will not rid you of a crab infestation?
...that I found Waldo
...that Oil has officially replaced Money, as the "root of all evil"?
...that Gravity, isn't just a good idea, its the Law?
...that Garfield wears a prosthetic leg (He lost the real one from diabetes.)?
...that the only reason Vicks Vapor Rub works is that the odor is so bad, it clears your nostrils?
...that there are two settings on an alarm clock: Rational, I can hear that plenty and I'm gonna lash out at everyone?
...that this sentence is a lie?
...That there are some websites that actually believe they can procure A rated written comedic material for Free?
..that this ellipsis actually has 2 dots, not 3?
...that the letter Z is awesome?
...that Snape kills Dumbledore?
- ...that the preceding quote is cliché?
...that you can have any brew you want, as long as it's Corona?
... That Military Recruitment commercials, and Beer commercials, have the Same end in the Long run: Your Death will possibly be emminent, in both cases.
...That wangfencing has become an official olympic sport?
...That wangfencing Isn't as much Fun as it sounds?
...that Carole King's smash hit "The Locomotion" is about her love of giving hand-jobs. The original words were "...cum on , baby, do the lotion motion!"
...No Matter how much money you throw at it,TV Will not change your life.
...that some celebrities think , and i quote " it takes LIKE a year for the SUN to go around the EARTH"... yep.. thats right..
...that there is nothing about these medications, advertised on TV, that aren't about; Anal Leakage.

*...that Anal Leakage; is Not funny.--baznoc 22:00, 26 April 2008 (UTC)

...that if an xbox 360 were thrown into space, the universe would orbit it and Bill Gates will laugh annoyingly?

...that in order to shoot a gun, you simply point, remove the safety, and pull the trig...Oh, shit. Oh, shit, I am so sorry. Seriously. I didn't realize it was loaded. Are you there? Hot damn, that's a lot of blood. Someone call a medic!
...that this isn't a red link?
Oh, wait. It is a red link. My bad.
that the original hackey-sack was emptied of the testicles first?
- that they actually forgot to remove the testicles from the second one?
  - The Hunchback of Notre Dame[[1]] tested the first un-successful 'hackie'(causing the hump, and poor posture)
that the price of gas continues to go up because the cost of transporting gas keeps going up.
that 12 is the new 18.
that ending a sentence in bitch makes it 92% more authoritative, bitch!
...That Vandalism is not Just a Great Cardio Workout?
...That there is No Medal for Stupidity?
...that junk, is an easier way to say the word,stuff?
...that Jesus doesn't want me for a sunbeam?
...that in a parallel dimension, you're wearing a cowboy hat?
...that "ain't" ain't a word?
...that FALCON PUNCH!

Retrieved from "http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Uncyclopedia:DYK_submissions"

Uncyclopedia:DYK submissions

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

[edit] A list of really, really intelligent DYKs that you really, really should submit

[edit] Were You Aware Of It?

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