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| Humo(u)r:
| 5
| You do a good job of recursive humour, both with the "killing himself in the past/future" and "replica of the school in the main courtyard." Also I liked your meta-humour: the author thinks about using an essay format, but too late, the paragraph is over; and the author getting bored (I wouldn't add any more, though, this kind of humour has to be used sparingly to be effective). I also liked cheeses being mistaken for Jesus.
The main weakness is your use of random humour. That's where you string together unrelated ideas, such as: 126th God of the Earth assassinated by a 15-year-old who later became prime minister of Japan. Most new writers try to write humour this way, so it is way way too overused. Also overused is listing names of famous people. I wouldn't use either of these techniques. Likewise, rererences to killing, porn, sex - although it is possible to do these well, they are used so much they aren't really funny in themselves anymore.
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| Concept:
| 6
| The best thing about your idea is that you have sections on all aspects of the school - history, school traditions, campus, etc. Lots of potential.
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| Prose and Formatting:
| 7
| Properly formatted. I'd do away with the list of famous alumni at the end.
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| Images:
| 5
| I like the pictures you have, though the Crusaders one could be made bigger. Needs more photos.
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| Miscellaneous:
| 5
| You have some good ideas. Try to keep it as creative and original as you can.
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| Final Score:
| 28
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| Reviewer:
| Sir Roger 06:19, 21 June 2007 (UTC)
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