Uncyclopedia:Reefer Desk/Archive8

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Laura Bush's alleged affair with Elvis

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Laura Bush and Elvis

RARE SHOCKING and COMPLETELY RELIABLE photographic evidence that Laura Bush if having an affair with none other than Elvis Presley!

Image credit: Syndrome
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This is an image I made ages ago and I'm putting it on here for a laff. Practically seamless, right? VFP quality, right? --SYNDROME MUN medicate 07:01, 25 March 2008 (UTC)

The examples right below this one are a better way to do the same thing. Also, don't do this again. Sir Modusoperandi 10:59, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
Sorry. No idea how that happened. --SYNDROME MUN medicate 20:34, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
Looking at the history, it really doesn't make any sense. You see I was editing this header, so it doesn't make sense that the header below this would be affected. I think it's because the wiki was acting strange yesterday. (Apparently Monika had trouble with it too.) --SYNDROME MUN medicate 20:41, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
Actually, I blame Monika for this whole mess. /me shakes fist at Monika. Sir Modusoperandi 20:53, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
 ::shakes fist back:: If you hadn't ninja-reverted while I was reverting slightly slower, none of this past the original deletion and restoration would have happened. --monika 21:09, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
...And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids! Old Mister Grumple 21:41, 25 March 2008 (UTC)

Megadeth's ever-changing lineups

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Megadeth in 1988

Megadeth in 1988: Dave Mustaine (vocals/guitar), Jeff Young (lead guitar), Chuck Behler (drums), and David Ellefson (bass)

Image credit: Monika
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Also:

and for reference: The unshopped image that appears before all of them in the article.

Yeah, I'm submitting 4 nearly identical pictures at the same time. Fishing for comments on the physically-taping-heads-over-an-existing-picture effect and what might be done to improve it, and on the general progression of the pictures through the article. --monika 23:39, 21 March 2008 (UTC)

I take it that this "Megadeth" has had some lineup changes? I'm not familiar with this band. I mostly listen to polka, myself. It's a lifestyle, really.
Try converting one (or more) of the taped on faces to halftone (like a newspaper), or play with the colour balance so that it's more obvious at a glance that they're not from the original pic (the first one, especially). Sir Modusoperandi 00:25, 22 March 2008 (UTC)
So my intention was to make the edits gradually more careless as the article went on. I use a black and white Al picture and an overexposed Jimmy picture in the 3rd picture here, and in the fourth, have one cut-n-pasted head on top of an existing cut-n-pasted head. I'd like to take your comment that the first one is not so obviously an edit as a compliment and an indication that I'm doing it right, with your permission, of course. --monika 00:54, 22 March 2008 (UTC)
Ah. I mistook "general progression". On a side note, I served under General Progression when we stormed the beaches at Normandy back in '85. Boy were the French surprised. I know this because one said "Quelle surprise!" after I poked him with my bayonet. Sir Modusoperandi 01:04, 22 March 2008 (UTC)
I am so bad at French, I had no idea what "Quelle surprise!" meant until it was used in a Megadeth song and I got curious and looked it up. --monika 01:15, 22 March 2008 (UTC)
Looks good now! ... Is that David Duchovny on the far left??? He must be awfully embarrassed about that now. --BlackInkWriterUser:BlackInkWriter 21:10, 4 April 2008 (UTC)
Thanks! (Now? Nothing changed...) I don't think Duchovny was ever in Megadeth (but it is so hard to keep track of all the Daves in the band...) but it would explain all the "Scully likes Megadeth" jokes Mulder made in the X-Files. --monika 04:02, 5 April 2008 (UTC)
Needs some weird people like Bono, or someone from Westlife in one of them. Nice piece of 'chopping. -- Hindleyite Converse 19:03, 28 April 2008 (UTC)
But... but... but I don't lie in my articles! --monika 01:10, 29 April 2008 (UTC)
PS. Past week's been busy, but spare time is looking up this month.

Night Time Ninja Attack

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Sure hope this doesn't go bump in the night!

Capercorn

Image credit: Capercorn
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I made the ninja with Chuck's head and the swaxe Capercorn made the UFO in the window and me. --The Great Yellow Crayon Get PWNED Yellow 130 is teh pwnz 04:55, 18 March 2008 (UTC)
1nd) Stop using MSPaint, Paint.net, or the like. They suck.
2rd) Start using Photoshop, Jasc PSP, or the like. They opposite of suck.
3th) Is this the effect you were trying for? If so, kudos! It looks like...bad. If not, what were you thinking? That you didn't even crop around Chuck's head indicates that you made this just to mess with my head. Let me assure you, it was messed with previously. Sir Modusoperandi 05:01, 18 March 2008 (UTC)
Good god ... have mercy. Deliver us from this monster! Capercorn, you're trying to be funny, right? Well, try again. How old are you???--BlackInkWriterUser:BlackInkWriter 20:50, 18 March 2008 (UTC)
Yellow is fairly young if I remember right, and Capercorn is his older brother. ~ Image:Tophatsig.png 23/03/2008 @ 04:09
Alright, so he is young. That doesn't make the image much better. It is ... hopeless! It shouldn't even be here! Get a veterinarian to kill it (and while he's at it, get him to kill Chuck Norris too). "Shift + Del", a quick and painless death! Unless, of course, it was meant to be so dreadfully ugly. Well, was it? --BlackInkWriterUser:BlackInkWriter 18:34, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
  • The sky should be blue. The ground should be fire. The man dressed up like a monkey should have guns coming out of his hands. "OMG" should be changed to a quote for Shakespeare ("If you prick me, do I not bleed!", perhaps). And the UFO should be at least twelve times as pixilated. Yeah. That would be a rockin' picture. -- Major Sir Zombiebaron GUNWotMUotMPotMAotMEGAEDMUPotMMAFEZotMIotMVotMUGotM (shout) 18:45, 23 March 2008 (UTC)
If you use the clone brush, and don't use that stupid MSPaint, then you can make his head look right. But really, at least try Photoshop Elements. I agree with everyone else, too. The land of make-believe doesn't believe in me:( 13:11, 26 April 2008 (UTC)
A true MSPaint masterpiece. It's so shit, it's good. -- Hindleyite Converse 19:04, 28 April 2008 (UTC)

101 Dog Fights

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101 Dog Fights

"Fun for the whole family!"

Image credit: CartoonDiablo
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I'd change the name to "Michael Vick". Glenn Close doesn't really fit.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:17, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

Swap her (in the car) out for him, as well. Sir Modusoperandi 04:33, 17 March 2008 (UTC)

Charlie Hitler

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Charlie Hitler

The greatest Nazi leader of all time.

Image credit: CartoonDiablo
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The head is too small for the body (see the head width vs shoulder width?), he's got no neck, the contrast for each is different (see the black of the swastika and the black of his eyebrows? Lower his contrast a bit and play around with his brightness to compensate), and there's a bright "edge" around Charlie that Hitler's body doesn't have. On a side note, I saw the Head vs Shoulder fight, back in '79. What a grudgematch. Sir Modusoperandi 22:39, 8 March 2008 (UTC)
Head is the wrong shape. There is a texture thing that also isn't quite right between the head and the body. Lighting is off as well. Charlies head has a "silver lining (good for dark clouds, bad for chops) Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 17:58, 9 March 2008 (UTC)
I'm not sure why one wouldn't just use a photo of Chaplin in The_Great_Dictator like this one - Rljenk 02:24, 4 May 2008 (UTC)

Paris Stilton

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ParisStilton

A World's Fair in my mouth

Image credit: Zombiebaron
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A pun is the lowest form of humour, unless you thought of it yourself.

~ Doug Larson on what you were about to say about this image
Stilton looks gross. Eww! Other than that, it's cheesy. Sir Modusoperandi 03:30, 29 February 2008 (UTC)
The stilton's that I have eaten - and the stinkier the better, tend to be from a buttery color to a golden mustard. This just looks blah. Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 15:44, 29 February 2008 (UTC)
Prettiestpretty, I can't speak to your experiences with stilton, but, all of the stilton that I have eaten looked similar to this Wikipedia image of stilton. So, I'm gonna stick with the cheese the way it is, and regret the fact that it does not scream "STILTON!" to you in quite the same way that it does to me.
Also, I've done quite a few (two) changes to the image. Any comments from anyone? -- Major Sir Zombiebaron GUNWotMUotMPotMAotMEGAEDMUPotMMAFEZotMIotMVotMUGotM (shout) 03:01, 1 March 2008 (UTC)
Does "text based image" count?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:00, 8 March 2008 (UTC)
Zombie, you put it here for comments, you get comments. From my perspective this doesn't look like stilton cheese. You may want to revisit that Wikipedia image and try and try and go for a veining similar to the image on Wikipedia. Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 18:02, 9 March 2008 (UTC)

Cruise Heil

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Cruise Heil

Tommy boy caught on film at the set for an upcoming drama flick, "An Austrian Painter's Life".

Image credit: Luvvy
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My first chop I dare show to the greater public. It's quite self explanatory. An hour or so of work on Photoshop CS2. -- *Twitch!* Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Heart_anim.gif Married British. Certifiably MORE British than You. Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 21:06, 26 Feb

It looks alright to me. Of course, I can't find my glasses. Sir Modusoperandi 23:10, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
Well, I've only been dabbling with photoshop. If someone with more technical know-how can take a look or give suggestions, then go ahead... -- *Twitch!* Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Heart_anim.gif Married British. Certifiably MORE British than You. Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 20:18, 27 Feb
Chop looks good, but to me its just another image thats been Hitlered. Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 16:57, 28 February 2008 (UTC)
Blame aron back at chat for that. He requested it. -- *Twitch!* Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Heart_anim.gif Married British. Certifiably MORE British than You. Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 17:14, 28 Feb

Cheesy Piano

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Cheesy Piano

The primary instrument of the cheesy piano ballad, the cheesy piano.

Image credit: Ljlego
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Here I am again! This one could actually make FP...terrible puns generally do well.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:03, 26 February 2008 (UTC)

It's not all that cheesy. Try making it more like a 3d piano made of cheese, with shadows and whatnot. Things like the underside of the lid should be darker than the upper surfaces of other things like not the lid. There's blood coming out of my ears. Never mind, I'm sure it's nothing. Sir Modusoperandi 04:44, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
The keys are just one big key! The opacity may need to be turned down a bit in order to get that "darker" thing that Modus is talking about, or you could use that darker tool thingy, if you'd like. Also, the edges need just a dash or two of blur, and I don't mean that you should get your head checked by a jumbo jet. The edges are just too jagged, like some kind of little pill. Also, I hate swiss cheese. Its just rubs me the wrong way. -- Major Sir Zombiebaron GUNWotMUotMPotMAotMEGAEDMUPotMMAFEZotMIotMVotMUGotM (shout) 15:20, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
Hey, I'll do what I can about the darkness and the blurred edges, but I am not 1) changing the cheese, 2)redoing it to make the keys less "one-y"-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:51, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
Alright, I didn't do anything about the brightness/darkness issue yet, still trying to figure out the most effective way to go about doing that. But I did do a substantial amount with the piano to make it look more 3D. Good?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:04, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
*cough*-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 00:27, 28 February 2008 (UTC)

(arbitrary outdent) Okely dokely, I added that darkness, like Modus asked. @ ZB, I can't figure out how to realistically separate the keys. It's my source image. I'm not doing it again, lots of work and all.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:04, 29 February 2008 (UTC)

I'd say just cover the keys up, as though that lid thing that piano's have were closed. Also, there's a bit of something going on beside where the support beam hits the side of the piano. It looks black, and has white edges, and should probably be either blurred, or made to look like the rest. -- Major Sir Zombiebaron GUNWotMUotMPotMAotMEGAEDMUPotMMAFEZotMIotMVotMUGotM (shout) 14:58, 1 March 2008 (UTC)

Noah's Ark

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Noah's Ark

Noah's Ark, directed by Tony Gilgamesch, is set to be the smash hit of the summer!

Image credit: Ljlego
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Yeah, it's text based. No, it won't do well on VFP. But I still would like to make it better. Any tips?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 04:58, 19 February 2008 (UTC)

PS: I wanted to get a picture of God looking over the crest, but that didn't pan out. That's why the tetragrammaton is there. In lieu, so to speak.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 04:58, 19 February 2008 (UTC)

You might want to change the image of the boat to something that's more bible-ish, although I'm not too sure where you'd be able to find an image of a boat from that angle. Otherwise, smooth out the sky a bit, maybe even put a picture of some storm clouds there. --Sir Seeker Image:Icons-flag-au.png (Call me?) |KUN|VFP| 05:16, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
The clouds don't match the style of the rest of the pic. Try ones more like these. Mmmmm...stormy. Good luck finding an ark at the right angle, though. A cursory search only found me this. Sir Modusoperandi 05:20, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
Better?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 16:52, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
Where'd the colour go? Sir Modusoperandi 18:39, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
I got rid of it, in an attempt to make it look more Old Testament. NG?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 22:01, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
I prefer colour. Then I get to use that extra U. B&W doesn't have it. Sir Modusoperandi 22:10, 19 February 2008 (UTC)
What happened to the B&W? Colour is so passe. Plus, it's got that U, which I hate. It's all, "Ooo! I'm so European. I use the metric system!" Harumph! Either lose the tetragramophone, or move it behind (or replace) the God credit. Sir Modusoperandi 02:15, 20 February 2008 (UTC)
Like so?-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 03:14, 20 February 2008 (UTC)
Sure. Sir Modusoperandi 03:21, 20 February 2008 (UTC)

Nine Inch Fascists

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Nine Inch Fascists

Unbeknownst to many, Hitler, Stalin, and Mussolini tried to make it big as a rock band in the 1920s, producing many hit songs over the years, including the platinum-selling album Mein Kampf. However, in the late 1930s, the band broke up, chiefly because of Stalin's and Hitler's differing views on politics and Eva Braun.

Image credit: Necropaxx
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  • Personally, I think this is my best 'chop so far. But my opinion isn't worth an old Mein Kampf record, so I need tips on how to make this VFP-worthy. Thanks! • • • SIR FELLOW Necropaxx KUN {PotM VFH VFP Chop HS VotM} (blah, blah, blah...) CheeseChapel_small.jpg 01:52, 14 February 2008 (UTC)
    Stalin's too dark. Hitler and Mussolini are too bright. Play around with the brightness/contrast of each until they're closer to the background. Also, you may want to consider a different Hitler pic. His head looks like he just broke his neck. Sir Modusoperandi 03:41, 14 February 2008 (UTC)
    As above, also, Mussolini and Stalin's heads are too large for their bodies. --Atomsk.gif Kaizer the Bjorn takkun Nya? (nya nya) (1961 model!) Check out T61! 00:09, 16 February 2008 (UTC)
    Stalin had a really big head. Mussolini's body, meanwhile, was too small. That's why they were so bitter. Hitler's excuse was that he just liked to rally. Sir Modusoperandi 03:45, 16 February 2008 (UTC)
    Better? • • • SIR FELLOW Necropaxx KUN {PotM VFH VFP Chop HS VotM} (blah, blah, blah...) CheeseChapel_small.jpg 01:42, 20 February 2008 (UTC)
    Stalin is better. The other two are still too bright (see how their "white" is whiter than the white of the background? White. There, that's my quote on that word for today. Next word: Burundi). Sir Modusoperandi 01:50, 20 February 2008 (UTC)
    Depending on what you use, you can just take their heads in a separate layer, make that layer several times darker than the other one, and maybe play with the contrast a bit to fix it.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:53, 20 February 2008 (UTC)
    Betterer? • • • SIR FELLOW Necropaxx KUN {PotM VFH VFP Chop HS VotM} (blah, blah, blah...) CheeseChapel_small.jpg 20:41, 23 February 2008 (UTC)
    Somewhat. Just be glad it's not in colour (then you get to try to colour match, as well). Isn't 'chopping fun? Wee! Sir Modusoperandi 22:07, 23 February 2008 (UTC)
    So, should I nom it on vfp or does it need any finishing touches? • • • SIR FELLOW Necropaxx KUN {PotM VFH VFP Chop HS VotM} (blah, blah, blah...) CheeseChapel_small.jpg 01:08, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
    It's good, but unfortunately I don't know how much VFP would like it....you kinda don't get what it is until you read it. And then it's kinda like "heh". Well made, though.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 01:27, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
    Very well. To vfp it goes. • • • SIR FELLOW Necropaxx KUN {PotM VFH VFP Chop HS VotM} (blah, blah, blah...) CheeseChapel_small.jpg 00:28, 28 February 2008 (UTC)
    Wups. I'm sorry I didn't notice earlier that the Hitler's hair is different than the back of his head. I saw this on an LCD monitor before, which tends to show black and near black as all the same shade. My bad. (/me kisses good old CRT. Still together after all these years. Who loves you? That's right! I do!) Sir Modusoperandi 20:26, 29 February 2008 (UTC)

Transvestite Beatles

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Transvestite Beatles

The Beatles became a force within American culture as good-old American boys from Liverpool, England. As their fame grew, however, they began to experiment with new looks to reflect their changing tastes. Their amimated piece "Pink Submarine" was actually censored by the MPAA, which forced the Beatles to make changes to their masterpiece.

Image credit: Luce, but make-up added by me
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. I'd like to put this picture and caption on VFP. How can I make it funnier? --Rolando8 13:50, 10 February 2008 (UTC)

It needs the perfect caption. I'd lend you mine, but it's in the shop. As such, I'm no help at all, am I? Sir Modusoperandi 22:59, 10 February 2008 (UTC)
To me the image doesn't speak to cross dressing so much as it does pale hairless chests. If the Beatles are suppossed to be crossdressing why aren't they in women's clothing? Where are their falsies? Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 00:35, 11 February 2008 (UTC)

Tom Cruise promotes Cosmic Guidance

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Tom Cruise funnelhat

Yet another ingenious follow-up invention to Scientologys exceptional E-meter. Tom Cruise leads the promotion in Central Europe and encourages people to start dealing with Cosmic Guidance (main article) as an innovative solution in everyday life situations.

Image credit: BlackInkWriter
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