Unknown

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

“I wouldn't know.”

~ Oscar Wilde on Unknown

“Wait! Why am I on this page?! I'm sombody! People know me!”

~ Joe Lieberman on being told that he is unknown

Unknown is the state of being unknown. Therefore, if someone says that something is "unknown", they mean that it is known to be unknown.

1 Etymology
2 Entymology
3 Scholarly Opinion
4 Scientific Opinion
5 Unknown, the artist
6 Other Known Unknowns
7 Unknown unknowns
8 Unknown Knowns
9 Known Knowns
10 See Also

[edit] Etymology

The word unknown comes from the Latin word unknownus, which roughly translates to "okonkwo" in English. The origin of the Latin word is itself known.

[edit] Entymology

There are several species of insect which are unknown. Schrodinger's weather-chaos butterflies are one example. No one knows whether they are causing tornados in Texas or not, because they are trapped in a box with a single atom of unknownium. When this atom decays it will roll a ball down a gutter and knock a little diving man into a bucket which will trap the little plastic mice. When exactly this will happen, or why the experiment was ever set up at all are completely unknown.

[edit] Scholarly Opinion

Most scholars refrain from making decisions about unknown, saying that the circumstances surrounding unknown are unknown. Their reason for doing this, however, is as of yet unknown.

[edit] Scientific Opinion

Scientists love the unknown. It allows room for lies, otherwise know as theories. The unknown area around the area of an unknown star is known to the highly scientific members of society to be: " The general area of uncertainty pertaining to an unknown object of an unspecified location." (you can call it TGA-OUP-TAU-OO-AUL for short (everyone else does(I swear(Seriously)))

Unknowium is the basic constituent of all that is unknown. One atom of unknownium weighs an unknown amount and has an unknown charge and spin. It is an unknown colour and taste. Some people claim that unknowium is blue and tastes of strawberries. But these people are obviously mental.

[edit] Unknown, the artist

Unknown's Latest Single

Unknown, the famed and prolific artist, is also the son of Anonymous, the most famous author of our time, however little is known of Unknown except that his unsigned works of art are everywhere.

Some scholars are flirting with the idea that trees could be one of his famous, possibly water color art works, but scientist still aren't sure. Water colors are lame, in a Marilyn Manson way, but so far tests have been inconclusive.

As well as being a prolific Artist in the writing and drawing sense, Unknown is also involved in the music industry and his well known single "Untitled" and album "Untitled" have become smash hit singles in many countries although how this is known is unknown.

He is also a fucking sweet arcade gamer, second only to AAA.

[edit] Other Known Unknowns

"Unknown" may also refer to the erasure of memory or existence by a person. To do so, a person must go to the menu bar of the human brain, click Edit, and then click Unknown (it is found just above Reknown). Many figures in the American culture have been affected by the use of the Unknown, such as Alanis Morissette, the other dude in the band Wham!, and the villains in the Carebears movies.

There is also a place known as "Unknown". As in, "You are now entering the unknown." This magical place is located between Over There and The Twilight Zone. It will not appear on any map, but you will know when you are entering it, because there is a huge sign made out of Pokémon, chanting their names incessantly. The exact population of Unknown is, you guessed it, unknown. However, its founders will let it be known that as soon as the Unknown Newfound Census Leaders of Everywhere Beyond Everywhere Near (UNCLE BEN) is created, we will be able to find the population (and a good place to find spicy pork and rice).

[edit] Unknown unknowns

(We can not provide a list of unknown unknowns because then they would be known, Aye?)

[edit] Unknown Knowns

There are many things that are known, yet some of them are unknown. What you know but don't is different from what Donald Rumsfeld knows but doesn't. Again, the reason behind this is currently unknown, though, it in fact may be simply an unknown known.

[edit] Known Knowns

These do not belong in this section, of course, unless you didn't know it was known. If you thought it was unknown, go to the head of the class, though the rest of the students will simply call you a brown-noser.

Remember, do not confuse unknown with unklown, which is the process of removing funny hair, noses, and feet from those foolish enough to wear them. And if they used the wrong kind of glue, it will hurt.

My favorite unknown was actually my BFF's maternal brother, Don. Fortunately, his baby sister couldn't pronounce Don and called him Nown, an epithet he was stuck with forever. But Unk Nown, as he was known, was a friendly sort who always bought us 11 year olds plenty of cigarettes and Thunderbirds. Man, the parties we had back then. You just don't see the like any more, you ungrateful wretched poof.