From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Grand Cross of the Order

“I've been diagnosed with pythagorian schizophrenia. The voices in my head tell me that all the angles are dead.”

~ Modusoperandi on mental illness

[edit] Ego, Vanity and Whatnot

Occasionally I get up off my ass (or more correctly, sit down on it) and make a page of my own, to which no one ever goes.

I also make pictures that people don't like and, having discovered UnNews, sometimes write fake news stories (rather than the fake regular stories that I normally make).

My future plans include the making up, followed by the playing, of bagpipe music.

This user is a Master in the Potatochoppers' Guild, and has earned the respect and admiration of all for outstanding work. Ask this user about joining!

This user is hereby nominated an HONORARY JEW, and is entitled for all honors and persecutions as such.

[edit] Things that are currently in places

Jerry Falwell on Top 10 of April

Nazi Windmill on VFP

[edit] Pages and pages of pages

[edit] My very own pages

(A) indicates that I did the audio too. I'm sorry.

(S) indicates satire. While there are some funny satirical pages listed here without this warning, this symbol is for the ones that aren't funny. I'm not sorry.

(FA) and (QFA) are featured and quasi-featured articles, respectively.

Bold pages are personal favourites, for reasons that I can't remember at the moment.

[edit] Modern Period School of Rock (A) New 5rd Poo Lit Surprise entries: Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face Best Alternate Namespace Article & (FA) Segue: a monologue Best Illustrated Article The Baker's Dozen (2th Place) Best Article & (QFA) Jerry Falwell (FA) UnScripts: Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden Magic Pantheism (A) Mah Nà Mah Nà Illegal aliens from outer space! (FA) Stephen Hawking ran over my cat‎ (FA), Best of (May) & #5 in Best of 2007 Irreducible complexity Rewrite & festival of collaboration madness with Weri long wang Future ☭f tomorrow, today! (A) (FA) HowTo:Deliver a Baby, A Concise and Easy-to-follow Guide Developed, Tested, and Approved by the AMA (No, Not that AMA. The Other One) and Reprinted with the Permission of the JAMA (Also a Different One) (FA) HowTo:Be at one with the universe (A) (FA) UnBooks:Pulp Novel, the case of the dashing dame (FA) Dune Rewrite (QFA) Sunni days and Arabian Nights UnBooks:Diary of a Caveman (FA) & Best of (May) Where's Her Majesty's Secret Service? The Bureaucracy Channel (FA) The Andy Griffith Show Rewrite Little Orphan Annie Rewrite (FA) Solid Gold (S) (QFA) UnScripts:HMS Potatore (QFA) & festival of collaboration madness with Shandon Walt Whitman Admins Das Love Boot Left Behind (S) Rewrite 2st Poo Lit Surprise entries: Suburban homeboy PLS Honorable Mention & (FA) Midlife Crisis Line Curmudgeon Canadians (A) (QFA)...well, at least up to this version American Fundie Magazine (S) (FA) UnCon (FA) & 1nd Poo Lit Surprise entry Freedom of speech [edit] UnTunes UnTunes:The Christmas Song (A) UnTunes:Supremes Commander (A)

[edit] UnNews UnColumns: Dinesh D'souza - The real problem with Newtonism UnNews:Pope gets new hat UnNews:Writers' strike expands to the interweb (A) UnNews:NSA bored with your conversations UnNews:Militant atheist violence continues UnNews:GOP to host 'Wholesome Christian Conservative Republican Values' gala UnNews:Unclaimed fart leads to elevator acrimony UnNews:Sputnik is launch! (A) UnNews:Kids getting dumber UnNews:Vacationer regrets choice of destination UnNews:Suspect sought in meatball misadventure UnNews:Road trip continues after father reneges on promise UnNews:New thing called wheel make move mud less hard (FA) UnNews:Amateur magician fails to enthral crowd UnNews:"WWJD?" leads to unfortunate end for local layabout UnNews:Mothra looking forward to retirement UnNews:You've got a little something on your face UnNews:Poor planning ruins Rapture (A) (FA) UnNews:Prophet strikes, Heaven grinds to halt UnNews:Spaceman from beyond the future visits UN UnNews:Famous person does something (S) (A) UnNews:Nerds take to the skies UnNews:Dunkirk debacle may extend war UnNews:Boy found at home, alone (QFA) UnNews:New discovery by authour of 'Versuch über ein neues Prinzip zur Auffindung der Heilkräfte der Arzneisubstanzen, nebst einigen Blicken auf die bisherigen' expected to supplant petroleum (S) UnNews:Persistent Protestants protest punishment (S) UnNews:New laws doubleplus good for consumers UnNews:National Day of Prayer ruined by godless protestors (S) UnNews:Limbo closes, millions homeless (S) UnNews:Kids still fucking (S) (FA) & Best of (November) UnNews:Recent Simpsons episode actually pretty funny UnNews:Security officer looking forward to posting UnNews:Holiday season finally winds down for Johnson family UnNews:Stop dressing like whores, you whores! (S) UnNews:DEAR LEADER is great (A) UnNews:Joshua leads Israelite Defense Force to victory (S) UnNews:Johnson family disappointed by new baby UnNews:Hypofaceitosis claims another victim UnNews:Justice League rocked by sexless scandal UnNews:Beethoven isn't deaf, he's just ignoring his girlfriend UnNews:Coarse conduct confounds construction (S) UnNews:Haggard still "fabulous!" (S) UnNews:Study topples pyramid, gives USDA black eye UnNews:Vatican decries "Miracle Bra" (S) UnNews:Supreme Court decision nail in coffin for Gargamel UnNews:Al-Qaeda operative spills the beans (S) (A) (FA) UnNews:Baroness heads M.A.R.S. after boardroom shakeup UnNews:Local Waitress doesn't think your kid is so cute UnNews:Terrorist takedown in Maine saves Christmas (S) UnNews:Santa snagged in counterfeit crackdown (S) UnNews:Chancellor committed to preemptive war (S) (FA) UnNews:Haggard feels "fabulous!" (S) UnNews:Fanboy disappointed by PS3 UnNews:Rumsfeld blames fiasco on faulty simulations UnNews:Flash and the Furious Five split UnNews:Papal proclamation to procure profit for prophet (S) UnNews:Police seek prophet in attempted herbicide(S)

[edit] L'enfant Terrible Period

As some of my earliest original pages these range from good but dry to, well, blah.

• Canada/History
• Sack Religion Warning: Some text written in "biblicaleze". Also it's really long and kind of weird. You have been warned.
• Pointless Rants:
  • Pointless Inventions
  • Pointless Hollywood

[edit] Pages that I didn't start, but have improved (hopefully)

• Conservapedia
• Nitrous
• Yakov Smirnoff
• Canada

[edit] Just the Audio

• Forum:Uncyclopedia Store: A referendum
• UnNews:Gandhi posthumously accused of mass genocide
• UnBooks:Dane Cook: An Unauthorized Autobiography, 2nd Edition (New Pictures)
• UnTunes:Be Gay
• UnNews:Dodgeball tragedy: 16 people 'out'

[edit] My Very Own Pointless...

• Gallery
• Pointless, Just Pointless Musings

[edit] Awards..

Potatochopper of the Month October 2006 UnBooks Author of the Month December 2006 Writer of the Month January 2007 Uncyclopedian of the Month April 2007

Foolitzer Prize Winner May 2007 Article Narrator of the Month July 2007 Potatochopper of the Year 2007

[edit] Featured Pages Featured Article: Suburban homeboy This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: American Fundie Magazine This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: The Bureaucracy Channel This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnBooks:Pulp Novel, the case of the dashing dame This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: Little Orphan Annie This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnNews:Al-Qaeda operative spills the beans This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: HowTo:Deliver a Baby, A Concise and Easy-to-follow Guide Developed, Tested, and Approved by the AMA (No, Not that AMA. The Other One) and Reprinted with the Permission of the JAMA (Also a Different One) This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: Future ☭f tomorrow, today! This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: HowTo:Be at one with the universe This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: Stephen Hawking ran over my cat This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnBooks:Diary of a Caveman This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: Illegal aliens from outer space! This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnNews:Poor planning ruins Rapture This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnNews:New thing called wheel make move mud less hard This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnNews:Chancellor committed to preemptive war This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnNews:Kids still fucking This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: UnCon This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Poet Lowrate This person is the winner of the Poo Lit Surprise, which they won for their article: Segue: a monologue Poet Lowrate This person is the winner of the Poo Lit Surprise, which they won for their article: Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face Featured Article: Why?:Get a tattoo of a tarantula on your face This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Featured Article: Jerry Falwell This person created an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia.

[edit] Featured Pictures Featured Image: Helloapocalypse.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Vaderguild.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Davidsketch.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Backofhead.png This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Osamabingrinchen1.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Pigletmugshot.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Kafkametamorphosis.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Benjaminfranklinoldschool.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Honestfortune-cookie.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Featured Image: Truthfulvendingmachine2.jpg This person created an image which became one of the Featured Images on Uncyclopedia. Aristocrat en Regalia This person is the winner of the Aristocrat's Ball, which they won for their article: Image:Allahuakbear.jpg

• Even More Awards and Honours