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[edit] The Moose himself

A majestic creature, he was roaming along, and going on magical adventures when all of a sudden he got captured by Pennsylvanian Nationals, and then was sentenced to death because of hunting season. He was beheaded, and then baked into a pie, since they believe that eating the brain makes yous smarter because they are retards. Somehow he escaped because of a magical spell placed upon him by the Pennsylvanian elder, because he impregnated his goats, and provided him with a fruitful harvest of moosegoats, which mad hime a very rich man.

He must now live the remainder of his life as a half moose/half pie, until he can find a cure, which isn't likely, because he is now immortal, MORE COWBELL!!. Plus he likes pie...a lot. Now he spends his life pursuing the unknown, and making witty references to songs that were popular 20 years ago. He lives the remander of his life living in the unknown, not to be bothered, because of his status as a freak of nature. Plus, I heard that MoosePie is one of the most delicious pies you could ever eat, and it gives you power of Spoon Throwing.