User:Tails Prower
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Miles "Tails" Prower is the gay lover of Sonic the Hedgehog. He was born in Petoria, Queens, the gayest town in Queens, which is the gayest county in New York, which is also gay. He has been convicted of statutory rape 46 times and Rough Gay Wolf...Er...Fox Sex 7 times.
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[edit] History
[edit] Early life
Tails was born in Petoria, Queens. At the age of 4 his parents left Queens and went to Mobius. Tails lived the rest of his life on Mobius with his father Vageena, and little sister, Yoko Ono. He also hung out a lot with his uncle Бора́т Сагди́ев, who taught him the fine art of taking it in the ass, a skill that would serve young Tails well for years to come. Despite the plethora of incestual sex that his family gave him, Tails always felt unsatisfied at home and dreamed of one day traveling away. At roughly the age of 8, Tails finally set out on his own in search of bigger cocks to suck and be sodomized with.
[edit] Sonic
For a few years, Tails found work at a male strip club. Before he met Sonic, Tails was frequently anal-raped by other animals because of his sexyness. One day, Tails was walking in a forest when he fell into a swamp. When Sonic came by, he saw a penis peering from the swamp, the rest of Tails's body completely submerged. Sonic pulled him out and showed Tails his huge cock, upon which Tails immediately began slobbing his knob like no other. After this erotic first encounter, the two quickly became butt buddies.
[edit] Slavery
However, the good times did not last long. Soon, the whole of Mobius was attacked and conquered by fat dominatrix Dr. Eggman. He systematically rounded up and enslaved all of the Mobians in concentration camps. After being processed, Sonic and Tails were split from each other. Tails was then forced to work as a prostitute in a brothel.
[edit] Rebellion
Sonic and Tails, though, eventually were able to escape from the camps and re-unite in their passionate love. They joined the Master Emerald rebel group, formed by the radical stripper leader Knuckles the Echidna. With the combined leadership of Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles, the Mobians soon threw a successful revolution that toppled Eggman's reign of terror. He was captured and subjected accordingly to public anal humiliation, sex with chavs, and other punishments. The night after the revolution, the three heroes engaged in a great homosexual orgy in celebration.
[edit] Skills
Tails is well-known for being able to store an incredibly large volume of semen in his rectum. Only Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer have been able to surpass him in this. Tails is also an expert submissive slave in BDSM activities, which led to him becoming the spokesperson and best customer of the Torture Tech Inc. sex toy company.
In the past, various world leaders have tried to capture and arrest Tails due to his sexual promiscuity. However, in the case The United Nations v. Miles "Tails" Prower, the prosecution was unable to prove that Tails had slept with the president of Peru due to lack of evidence. Kim Jong-il, when asked to testify, stated, "Jesus Christ, look at him. He's a hot little two-tailed fox. If any world leader had fucked him, it would've been me!" Although photography was forbidden in the courtroom, one artist managed to make a sketch showing Tails allegedly bribing the judges with free blowjobs and lap dances.
[edit] Trivia
- It is occasionally rumored that Tails is heterosexual. This is not true as he is currently married to Shadow the Hedgehog, the closest thing on Mobius to Sephiroth.
- Tails loooooooooves a-to-m.
- Tails keeps over 3000 dirty gay porn magazines under his bed. He masturbates furiously to them every night.
- The only woman Tails would ever have sex with is his second cousin, Jennifer Aniston. However, she killed him in the second-to-last episode of Friends.
- Tails is good friends with fellow gay stripper and porn star Drew Pickles.
- Tails holds the record of having sucked the most amount of cocks in one minute, 1337.
- TAILS IS A FAGGOT BUT SONIC DOESN'T MIND!!! (Proof [1])
- Sonic shits in Tails' mouth every night before he goes to sleep. (Proof [2])
- Tails' homosexuality is extremely controversial and often looked down upon by the conservative, homophobic media such as Fox News, CNN, and Wikipedia [3].
