User talk:Splaka/Archive3

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Contents 1 Rangeblock 2 List of phrases 3 Sweden 4 Gossip 5 American culture 6 Paris, Texas 7 Boobies 8 MediaWiki 1.5-age 9 I'm bored <3 10 Levin 11 I think 1996: is ready for primetime 12 Judenmouse 13 Kakun's family 14 Robert Morris (talk) 15 Shitte and Shiriuchi 16 I finally got to be a hero! 17 Add "zh-hant.uncyclopedia.org", not moving "zh:" to "babel:zh/", pls! 18 hi 19 @poop 20 Muck 21 I award you 22 Hiya... 23 NRV Tagging 24 Whopper 1 25 Holy crap... 26 Reality Check 27 Apology and hopefully a new beginning 28 More CSS magic 29 Cookie 30 Pretty Please, with Sugar on it? 31 Chess board captions? 32 Riaan Cruywagen 33 Oracle 34 Deleted Article 35 Hwat do you mean "Not notable"??? 36 Main Page 37 Help me, bitch 38 Nihilism 39 Appologies 40 Bass Offender Checklist 41 Telescum New Zealand 42 Where's Abbie Hoffman? I don't know, I don't know 43 VFH 44 Slap me some skin 45 Sig picture 46 Mate? 47 Jebany Menel 48 Multi-ban 49 VFP fix 50 Speling on Euphemism 51 Midnight Cowmouse Question 52 Think, don't suck. 53 Smoke da' Bong! 54 Uncyc Hackers? 55 Blockage 56 Easy on the trigger finger 57 Jesii 58 69.37.95.51 59 Template:Shithead 60 Patrick Amba-Skibow 61 Ban Patrol 62 NRV on Raffles Institution 63 Custom JS for Do_NOT_click_any_links!/click32 64 Protect page, pls 65 An idea I'm wondering about 66 DYK submission 67 Uncyclopedia.org 68 502 Proxy Error 69 Ban patrol message 70 Tokei-Tai Link 71 Image 72 KUN 73 My article!!! 74 I officially have a problem with you. 75 Does this mean... 76 Now the template is screwed up. 77 Yahoo! 78 Most linked to! 79 wii(!) 80 Stankee Candle Photos 81 A Template 82 ED SUCKS BIG, FAT HORSE... 83 Duel Masters 84 Ask Hal 9000 85 Vigilantism 86 Polar bears 87 Whoa! Sirius Issues! 88 Goddamnit Splarka! 89 Burninator 90 Ewing 91 Shadowmarth & Namster teh Hamster 92 Keeping the Vandals at Bay 93 Thanks for the help with my signature and the new user project 94 The new Template:VFH... 95 Crack Vandal 96 About JaffaScript and the Uncyclopedia:Departure of Fun 97 ffs 98 Deletion 99 FFS 100 Remember MasterNinja5261? 101 Restoration 102 Pagemoving 103 Advanced formatting question 104 Read my talkpage 105 Language 106 Game? 107 Award 108 Cheap whore 109 Messed up userpage 110 VFD

Rangeblock

I've blocked the User:58.165.0.0/16 range temporarily to stop a ridiclous flow of Robert Morris spam (though I may remove it because it seems to have spread to other blocks entirely) which is 65000 or so IPs. Keitei told me to! We need to do something, this has been going on for awhile now. --Sir Volte KUN Talk (+S NS CM Bur. VFP VFH) 15:01, 3 February 2006 (UTC)

Actually this seems to have curbed it (for now). --Sir Volte KUN Talk (+S NS CM Bur. VFP VFH) 15:15, 3 February 2006 (UTC)

List of phrases

• Splaka,

I just noticed List of phrases was just deleted recently. Would it be possible to convert it into one of the Worst 100 series or do you think that's been fairly overdone already ? Also I've found when I sign on my User name now, I'm often blocked from editing (which I often find on Wikipedia as well). I thought that wasn't an issue since I've created an account or is that due to the dynamic IP ? Anyway hope you had a Merry Christmas. :) MadMax 17:37, 13 Jan 2006 (UTC)

• By the way, there doesn't seem to be any entries in the Special pages (Orphans, Deadends, Uncategorized, etc.). Is there a system problem or did someone finally get there ahead of me ? ;-)

Ok, I've restored it and moved it to User:MadMax/Sandbox for you to fiddle with. Signing on when blocked is still blocked, but we can identify you and unblock you this way (if possible). I've unblocked aol again. Cheers. P.S.: Yes, the server is running in miser mode. Those can't be live anymore (*sniffle*), but the wikicities admin are working on a way to make them updated daily or hourly or something. Meh! Although we should get Special:Shortpages back live. --Splaka 00:02, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

• Thanks Splaka. I'll see what I can do with the list. If your having trouble with AOL, I can always wait until using a library computer. MadMax 23:43, 17 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Sweden

Please kill someone. --Suresh 00:22, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Hang on, seems to be a DB problem. --Splaka 00:27, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

DB? Dung Beetle? Or Data Base? --Suresh 00:29, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Fixed. --Splaka 00:42, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Gossip

I just totally new that. It is soo like you - you just don't get it, duh --Suresh 01:14, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Duh? Duh!? Those in mental institutions should throw duhs around. What you don't get is the minimum standard of quality we strive for around here. That "article" has no formatting and almost no links. It reads like a livejournal post. Go pick on another admin for a while. Geez. --Splaka 01:17, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Well that was the intension - so at least it infringed.:) --Suresh 01:28, 14 Jan 2006 (UTC)

American culture

you fucking lifeless admins don't seem to get it. that's okay, delete the damn page. Agree to it that American culture actually exists. But you should at least talk to a few people before making these senseless decisions, you right-wing fat fuck.

I'm now expect some smart-ass comments which will be in an attempt to make you sound smart. C'mon man, show us the culture! You guys should be so proud. Jarkis 02:27, 15 Jan 2006 (UTC)

You need to calm down. I suggest you read BGBU to gain a greater understanding of how this site works rather than rashly shoot your mouth off at an admin... "you fat fuck." --Sir Flammable KUN (Na Naaaaa...) 02:32, 15 Jan 2006 (UTC)

1. You don't get it, we require new articles to have a minimum level of quality and humor, yours does not meet that.
2. NRV tagging is actually giving the article a chance. We delete most new submissions because they are, literally, one line of crap. Take the NRV as a compliment you lifeless poster-of-semi-crap, and work on your article to make it worthy of Uncyclopedia.
3. Grow a brain, NRV is not a political commentary tag, it is a quality (that is, lack of) commentary tag. You are allowed to make fun of any notable thing (or lack of a thing) you want, but making brash assumptions about us just makes you the idiot. The 'lifeless' admin here include many Canadian and British citizens. They hate Americans as much as you, but you're probably too stupid to realize that. Or indeed, even look at one single other page besides the one you created and think of as comedy gold (hah).
4. Don't insult us, kthxbie.

--Splaka 02:43, 15 Jan 2006 (UTC)

I looked at this article and it just looks like a lower-quality version of the fake error 404 page. The "(whatever) cannot be found Internet error? That's been done to death. You may want to rewrite it to say something other than just "...not found". After all, American culture (although it is foreign to me) does exist - it's used in Wisconsin in the manufacture of cheese. :) --Carlb 03:14, 15 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Paris, Texas

Oh wise and powerful admin, I hearby appeal to you to reconsider the imminent nuking of Paris, Texas. I believed you tagged it before the associated article was finished, and I have reworded it to make the attempted "joke" more obvious. Grovel grovel, -- Droopy 16:00, 15 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Ok. If it is still under construction use {{construction}} (I inserted it for you). Using a stub tag is indicitive of "I am too lazy to finish this, someone else do it", which is ripe for NRV tagging ^_^. --Splaka 03:17, 16 Jan 2006 (UTC)

Boobies

Splarka....why you no play on IRC anymore. IRC without Splarka is like a day without Boobies. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Boobies are over-rated anyhow! --Splaka 01:06, 18 Jan 2006 (UTC)

May you sleep for ever in HER immortal Cleavage..... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

MediaWiki 1.5-age

Hiya Splarka. how's it going? I have a question for you concerning the update. Well, it's not really about the update itself, but about its capabilities. I'm sure you'll remember the screw-up I managed last year with the if-template and stuff like that. Well, I was wondering: is there anyway I can test the if (and maybe even the equal) template on the new wiki-software without causing anybody major stress or dismay? I won't touch the VoteReminder template, but it would be nice to know if those things work now.

Thanks. --⇔ Sir Mon€¥$ign^STFU F@H|CM|+S 07:32, 18 January 2006 (UTC)

I'm bored <3

Dear Splaka,

You are a slutwhore and I hate you. Please stop sucking at life.

Sincerely,

Me

I love you too. --Splaka 07:10, 23 January 2006 (UTC)

Levin

• What do you mean non-notable? I was editing it as you deleted it, then I saved it, and there was only the recent text. I don't get why there's not an article about Levin allowed on here;
  • 1. It's in jest
  • 2. The bastard needs some humour in life :-(
  • 3. He's way too serious. --Kashzone 06:52, 23 January 2006 (UTC)

Three things:

1. He is non-notable. This issue was discussed on Wikipedia at Wikipedia:Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Rob_Levin. We usually match Wikipedia criteria for notability, since we are a parody of them. Having articles about non-notable people is basically slandanity, which we and they don't appreciate. Livejournal is a better place for that ^_^.
2. The title wasn't even the proper location, but fixing this wouldn't have saved it, just prevented insta-insta-deletion.
3. "It is in jest" and "he is way too serious" and "he needs to lighten up" are no excuses for writing trash about someone non-notable.

Given the above, it matched our guidelines for insta-deletion put down in stone by our overly uptight policy on vanity/slander/slandanity/non notability. --Splaka 07:03, 23 January 2006 (UTC)

• What do you mean non-notable? Everyone knows me. I'm more popular than Moses. I don't get why my vanity article isn't allowed here.
  • 1. The part about my kid being retarded was really funny. Erm, maybe not.
  • 2. Kashzone has been beatified for his role in adding much appreciated humor into my life. I understand he's being considered for sainthood. ;)
  • 3. I'm way too serious about needing to have an article in Unicyclopedia.
  • 4. Wait, this isn't about unicycles?

I think 1996: is ready for primetime

Have a looksee. Can it be a reskin? - Nonymous 03:43, 28 January 2006 (UTC)

Oh god my eyes! What did you do to my eyes! Arrr! I'll consult the skinners. --Splaka 03:49, 28 January 2006 (UTC)

Judenmouse

Expanded. Anything else you want me to add? Or is it long enough?

PS: Why does Uncyc love to delete more often than Wikipedia?

PS2: Do you use Wikipedia? (I forgot to ask this: -->) What is your screenname on that site? Are you also an admin there? --Chomu 05:16, 30 January 2006 (UTC)

I'll remove the nrv, but someone else may add it.

Because we get so much junk in a day, 2/3 to 3/4 isn't even worth putting on the VFD. Seriously. People assume satire = nonesense/cruft.

Yes, no. --Splaka 05:19, 30 January 2006 (UTC)

Kakun's family

I expect you to apologize for calling my family whores and also to unban me. It's your fault I said what I said. I thought it was Dawg who made that comment. -- VFP Eincyc (talk) 07:44, 30 January 2006 (UTC)

Robert Morris (talk)

Hey, sorry 'bout that. I noticed you deleted the talk page as I was editing it. I guess I accidentally re-created it. Again, sorry to put you through the trouble again.

--His Royal Majesty, Simulacrum Caputosis the Great 07:26, 2 February 2006 (UTC)

No prob, I'll leave the talk page there for now. You can remove the vfd if you want, or leave it incase it comes back. Rar! --Splaka 07:33, 2 February 2006 (UTC)

Shitte and Shiriuchi

Both of them are actually real places ... and the translation of the names is almost correct. 222.158.163.225 10:42, 2 February 2006 (UTC)

Ok, I had no concern about them being made up. But one line articles are usually deleted after a week. You are welcome to expand them! Pretty please? ^_^ --Splaka 10:44, 2 February 2006 (UTC) PS Alternately you can put them in Undictionary.

There is absolutely nothing funny in either of the cities other than the name : ). Maybe I should make an article for Cities in Japan with the character for butt in the name, some with names resembling the word shit intead. 222.158.163.225 10:47, 2 February 2006 (UTC)

I finally got to be a hero!

Finally, I got to be the one to see a vandalization of an admin's page, revert it, and ban the luser responsible. w00t! I may have been a bit soft on the culprit with just a 2 week ban, but the IP addies belongs to a school, so anything longer for just the one IP would have been pretty pointless. If Pascack Valley High School, New Jersey (home of the Indians and possibly other oppressed indiginous peoples) decides to make Uncyclopedia their new vandalistic home, we can always put the kibosh on the whole /24. [insert authentic Native American war whoop here] -- Sir BobBobBob ! S ? [rox!|sux!] 15:47, 2 February 2006 (UTC)

EDIT: we all have the same ip here at this school, its annoying...1 guy vandalizes a wiki, we all get banned -.-

Add "zh-hant.uncyclopedia.org", not moving "zh:" to "babel:zh/", pls!

Add "zh-hant.uncyclopedia.org", not moving "zh:" to "babel:zh/", pls!

All languages are moving to Babel: namespace. We cannot currently add subdomains to uncyclopedia.org. See User_talk:Ryoske#New_Wiki if you want your own uncyclopedia spinoff. --Splaka 22:39, 3 February 2006 (UTC)

hi

help me out. as I'm sure you have noticed, I haven't been on this pedia much at all, and even less lately. what's the deal? what kind of things are allowed? schwp schwokka, aka: Poopface Steinbrenner 04:08, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Well, calling an admin (Volte) gay for removing a useless category from your page is frowned upon ^_^. Volte has been cleaning up Special:Categories of ones that have very few pages in them or no redeeming quality. I've fixed your talk page to appear to be in that category now. Enjoy --Splaka 04:12, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

what are you doing to my frikkin talk page , yo??

Sorry, felt ever so slightly guilty about reverting you, so I just added the category back as a fake category box. Enjoy. --Splaka 04:12, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

@poop

ok, it doesn't have to be wiki'd but "I am shitting"? what the lmnof is wrong w/ that? ThoughtControl ^{Ghost written confessions} 07:34, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Well, you put it in as a wikilink, and volte deleted the page it linked to. Also, it was just a stupid link. HTBFANJS. --Splaka 07:40, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

k, well I found it, anyway, so it's all butter so my bad so yay I'm still human. good. that was close one. I thought I was like a furry troll from willow. whew! ThoughtControl ^{Ghost written confessions} 07:50, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Muck

Why does my article have no redeeming value? There are other pages so short with just terms. You hate mine. Why? --PinkyToe 08:07, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

I am not even going to justify that with a response. Go look at some other gems on Category:Worthless_Articles. --Splaka 08:11, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

What about euoripods? That is like this but you don't no reedeeming value it. Mine even has a picture and euroipods didn't. --PinkyToe 08:21, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

NRV is a second chance. Be grateful. --KATIE!! 08:25, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Splarka had nothing to do with Euroipods. I exceeded the boundaries of both admin authority and good taste by featuring Euroipods, and since then it's gained a legacy far exceeding that which muck will ever have. --—rc (t) 08:27, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Might this not be undictionary-worthy? When I was a small n00b I wrote an article that was even shorter and Splaka MTU'd it. » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 08:53, 4 February 2006 (UTC)

Using Undictionary as a dumping ground for every small substub that wasn't quite bad enough to be killed off in Uncyclopedia:QuickVFD was initially my fault, and likely one of the more stupid moves I've made here. Undictionary is now about 40-50% utter rubbish and hundreds of these entries will need to be deleted, eventually, one by one by one. Sorry. :( --Carlb 03:50, 5 February 2006 (UTC)

I award you

Hiya...

• Feel free to delete my stubs as I'm just venting, mostly. However, Urban Dictionary does suck and the world must know. Danny Lilithborne 10:13, 5 February 2006 (UTC)

It does suck, please expand the article! expose the suckitude. --Splaka 10:16, 5 February 2006 (UTC)

NRV Tagging

Can you delete NRV Tagging at page Propagandalaw. I make it into finished. ----DudeMan 12:42:20 (UTC)

I've removed it for you, but the page needs somebody to go through and fix the English. --Sir Volte KUN Talk (+S NS CM Bur. VFP VFH) 13:27, 5 February 2006 (UTC)

Whopper 1

Ime sorry... 68.254.156.63 18:39, 8 February 2006 (UTC)

Holy crap...

So I just looked at recentchanges and see about a thousand Talk pages getting restored by you. Did some admin go delete-crazy or something? What the crap happened? --[[User:Nintendorulez|Nintendorulez | talk]] 22:46, 8 February 2006 (UTC)

• I believe Dawg deleted them all. However, that's all I know.   t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 22:49, 8 February 2006 (UTC)

Nin, sore subject. Let it be. (Admin fight!) --KATIE!! 22:53, 8 February 2006 (UTC)

Reality Check

Hey, I started a page making fun of this anti-smoking group Reality Check NY, and someone from the group keeps editing it to put their mission statement there. I'm new to the Uncyclopedia, does that count as vandalism here? Secondwhiteline 03:39, 11 February 2006 (UTC)

Apology and hopefully a new beginning

Dear Splaka- I'm going to try the waters again and once more want to extend my apologies for being a total nut case before my self imposed exhile. I've dealt with my mania, reread the error of my ways, done charity work for the poor and danced at my stepdaughter's wedding with her husband's grabby-grabby father. I promise to be good. I hope you will consider my apology and see sincerity in it. Prettiestpretty 01:57, 12 February 2006 (UTC)

Ask codeine, I am just his sockpuppet ^_^.

...

But seriously, all is forgiven, mostly because I have a short memory. Welcome back. --Splaka 03:03, 12 February 2006 (UTC)

More CSS magic

Please add this to Babel:Gbs.css to better spoof Wookieepedia (margin-right is there to reserve the place for Google ads):

body { background: white }
#content { margin-right: 125px; border-right: 1px solid #aaa }
#projects { visibility: hidden; }
#custom-advert { visibility: hidden; }
#siteSub { display: inline; color: white; font-size: 90%; font-weight: normal; font-style: italic; }
#siteSub:before { color: black; content: "From Ewokpedia, the IE-free Edit Wars encyclopedia (you don't use IE. Don't ask how we know.)" }

The method used to substitute the sitenotice text only works in Firefox and Opera 7.5+, IE users will see nothing. Also made Template:Navbox to substitute the contents of the navbox, see Talk:AAAAAAAAA!. - Sir Sikon [formerly known as Guest] 16:41, 14 February 2006 (UTC)

CSS added. --Splaka 04:11, 15 February 2006 (UTC)

Actually, we can't block the custom-advert box by default, sorry. We don't want to annoy our host. Actually, shame on you for asking! Bad Guest, no oxygen. --Splaka 04:18, 15 February 2006 (UTC)

Cookie

I never thanked you for adding that NRV tag thing, did I? Well consider this my thanks. :) --officer designate Lugiatm MUN NS CM ZM WH 14:02, 15 February 2006 (UTC)

Lugiatm has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Pretty Please, with Sugar on it?

Splaka, can I please, please, please have my Won't you help template back. I know that there are many of that type but none of them play on people's guilt/emotion. Pretty, pretty please? If no one uses it in a month I promise that you could zap it. Pretty, pretty, Pretty, please???? Dame GUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 02:24, 19 February 2006 (UTC)

Bah! Fine. But it'll be on your head. Rar! *Menacing glare*. --Splaka 06:37, 19 February 2006 (UTC)

Just so long as it doesn't get on my face. XOXOX Dame GUN WotM PotM VFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 18:14, 19 February 2006 (UTC)

Prettiestpretty has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic.

Chess board captions?

Multiple kings on Template:Chess are just fine -- an impossible position makes it all the funnier IMO. But why not include a caption -- (Black/White) to play and win in (-10..2000) moves? This could be the start to an entirely randomly-generated chess column at UnNews. Also, what if each square were to include, maybe one time out of 500, something that wasn't a chess piece at all? Seahen 02:02, 19 February 2006 (UTC)

I think captions would be use rarely enough that there wouldn't be a need for a template. Just put some <choose><option> codelets in the news item. Although this non-chess piece randomly does intrigue me... "Pawn, Rook, King, Knight, Pawn, Rook, Pawn, Pawn, Pennsylvania.... wtf". --Splaka 06:40, 19 February 2006 (UTC)

Riaan Cruywagen

Please undelete the Riaan Cruywagen page. He is not non-notable. He is the oldest South African newsreader, and has a high public profile in South Africa. He is very worthy of satire, as he has a creepy, strange look to him, and has not changed his appearence in decades. Every Afrikaans speaking person knows instantly who he is! --196.25.3.250 09:02, 20 February 2006 (UTC)

Can you show me some references? There are only 214 google matches for his name, and no en.wp article [1]. That seems highly unnotable. :/ --Splaka 09:08, 20 February 2006 (UTC)

Well, the fact that he didn't have a wikipedia article was a clear oversight :-). Actually, he's a uniquely South African icon, which explains the lack of internet coverage to a certain extent. He is unusually intelligent for a newsreader. His only two film appearances have been as himself. If that's not notability, what is? He is well liked, and actually a very interesting person, and as you can see in this interview and this one, his ever-youthful appearance always comes up in conversation. Because he has been involved in South African TV since the very start, he has an image of being indestructible and eternal in popular SA culture. His name is instantly recognizable as a byword for institutionalized media (see for example this blogger's use thereof; he didn't have to explain to his audience who Riaan was. When the SABC threatened to get rid of him, strikes were threatened.

So yes, not a notable person on the international scene, but definitely a notable South African. --Slashme 06:20, 21 February 2006 (UTC)

Ok, the notability factor is extremely low but you make a good case. However, the article's contents made it delete worthy. Chuck Norris/Vin Diesel 'list of facts' reworkd for someone else just aren't very funny. Please choose another approach. --Splaka 04:29, 22 February 2006 (UTC)

Oracle

I'm a new uncyclopedia user... my first edit and first article. I'm trying to find something funny between meshing the words Oracle (database) and Oracle (fortune teller) and the Oracle CEO Larry Ellison. Can you give me some ideas? (see article Oracle)

I don't know much about the database, but you might approach it in a manner like: The Oracle database system, much like TarotSQL, returns different results each time data is read from it. The information returned depends on the alignment of certain celestial bodies and constellations, as well as the mood and status of the person requesting the information. While most database systems might consider this a bug, Larry Ellison marketed it as a feature. ... or such --Splaka 04:29, 22 February 2006 (UTC)

Deleted Article

Well, you deleted my first article, on Tiger Woods, and I was wondering why? Was it just straight out horrible? Or was there some other reason such as a format problem? All it said in paranthesis was "This hurts my face". --UtopiasNemo 04:53, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

There was very little content and all the images were external. That hurts my face! Rar. If you recreate it at least upload the images and format them using the [[Image]] tag. Pretty please? --Splaka 04:56, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

Hwat do you mean "Not notable"???

As I see, you've deleted the article Thor Heimdall marking it "not notable". JFYI: the name was a clear pun of the famous marine biologist and antropologist Thor Heyerdahl. VFU!!!1!!!one!!111!eins!1factorial Grep 12:05, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

..."famous marine biologist"...lol!!! One of the funniest phrases I've heard in a loooong time. I'll bet he's even more famous than all those famous meterologists and geologists. I hear they have to have super-tight security to keep all the fangirl-stalkers away from them. Else they'd be buried in panties and shit. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 15:21, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

I'm amazed in what arse you've been last 50 years if you dinn't ever hear of Thor Heyerdahl? Grep 16:53, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

He is pretty famous. But that most certainly isnt a clear pun. ~Sir Rangeley GUN WotM UotM EGA +S (talk) 15:56, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

Okay, just undelete and rename properly... Grep 16:53, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

Done - short stub now located at Thor Heyerdahl. I was nice enough to include our precious NRV tag, which will give you a week's grace period to actually make it into an article. Once that happens, remove the NRV tag. If you don't make it into an article, in a week it will die a horrible death. Like last time.

To be clear, an article is several paragraphs of information, with headers and such. Not just one. Make it good, make it funny. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 17:09, 24 February 2006 (UTC)

Main Page

Before you continue tinkering with the Main Page, please copy Main Page/XHTML over it. - Sir Sikon [formerly known as Guest] 12:54, 26 February 2006 (UTC)

No, I've got a better idea. Why don't you hold off until we are done designing it. --Splaka 03:35, 27 February 2006 (UTC)

Help me, bitch

Aaargh. Now I can't even seem to get onto the cgi chat client at work! Curses, curses and thrice curses! However, with your massive irc brain, maybe you can proffer some kind of solution or workaround if there is one. When I trty to connect I get the following:

*** Welcome to CGI:IRC 0.5.6 (2005/02/09)
*** Looking up irc.freenode.net
*** Connecting to irc.freenode.net [216.165.191.52] port 6667
-irc.freenode.net- *** Looking up your hostname...
-irc.freenode.net- *** Checking ident
-irc.freenode.net- *** No identd (auth) response
-irc.freenode.net- *** Found your hostname
-brown.freenode.net- *** Banned:  Your computer may be infected with a trojan.  Please contact staff@freenode.net (f296b) 
*** Closing Link  127.0.0.1 (Banned)
*** Disconnected from IRC (type /reconnect to connect again)

I feel so... isolated. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 09:15, 28 February 2006 (UTC)

/me waves at Cody. And have a look at Uncyclopedia_talk:Chat#Slacker -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Hmmm. I've emailed the staff@freenode.net address, so we'll see. In the meanwhile, could you check the ban list on #uncyclopedia and make sure that it isn't just a rogue wildcard which is banning the whole @ross.wikia.com domain? Cheers. -- Sir Codeine K·H·P·B·M·N·C·U·Bu. · (Harangue) 09:44, 28 February 2006 (UTC)

Very odd. I don't think that has anything to do with #uncyclopedia, looks like a freenode server problemo. --Splaka 20:41, 28 February 2006 (UTC)

Nihilism

I was taking a look at Nihilism earlier and I noticed that the community section is showing up on the left. I checked the history and noticed that you've done a bunch of the work on it, so I thought I'd let you know so that you can fix it. --Sir gwax (talk) » Major KUN UotM FH++ F@H CM GD NS Bur. +S 17:12, 28 February 2006 (UTC)

Carlb's fault. When I made the css for that page, the community box didn't exist. Will look into. --Splaka 20:41, 28 February 2006 (UTC)

Appologies

I had sworn that Uncyclopedian of the Month had been on the front page before and although, admittedly, vanity got me off my lazy ass, I had intended to readd (improperly) it for a while. Thanks for checking me and sorry for making it necessary. --Sir gwax (talk) » Major KUN UotM FH++ F@H CM GD NS Bur. +S 04:18, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

Heh heh. I think Uncyclopedian of the Year was there for January, but that's it. Check the history though? --Splaka 04:20, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

Bass Offender Checklist

It looks great after your cleanup job! Muchas, muchas gracias amigo. ~ T. (talk) 06:33, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

Glad ya like it, was trying to make it look like a ticket or piece of legal paper. Any other suggestions? --Splaka 06:37, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

None. I'm extremely pleased with it. Speaking of which, I can't tell you how many times I've used that /pal page (at Ogopogo's, but it looks like your doing). It's enormously handy! Thanks! ~ T. (talk) 20:29, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

Holy crap!!! I had never noticed User:Ogopogo/pal before, but DAMN MAN!!! That's an impressive bit of work. And indeed, the checklist is pretty amusing. Tho I can't figure out where the fish are. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 23:29, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

<3 ... Maybe we should move it to Uncyclopedia:Palette or some such? --Splaka 00:52, 2 March 2006 (UTC)

Sounds good to me. I'd like to use PAL as the shortcut, except there's a lame stub there (though it could be moved to "Pal," which is free). ~ T. (talk) 02:22, 2 March 2006 (UTC)

Well, shortcuts to Uncyclopedia: namespace should be prefixed with UN (using en.wp style). UN:PAL would work. --Splaka 02:25, 2 March 2006 (UTC)

True, but many of those have dupe redirects without the prefix (WRITE, NUB, DUMB, etc.). Truth is, I'm basically a lazy person willing to bend rules in order to save 3 keystrokes (especially when one requires use of the shift key).  :) UN:PAL is fine, too. ~ T. (talk) 02:34, 2 March 2006 (UTC)

Telescum New Zealand

I'd appreciate you not just putting up articles for deletion just because you don't understand them. Yes it is aimed at a target audience, mainly New Zealanders (most of which have had a bad run in with Telecom, or Telescum as it were) but then so are most of the seemingly senseless articles on this site.

I'd appreciate you actually reading the NRV tag and NOT accusing me of putting your article up for deletion just because you don't understand it. It is not a nomination for deletion, but a stay of execution and a chance for the article to be expanded and formatted. I'd also appreciate you signing your comments. You don't always get what you want. --Splaka 07:04, 1 March 2006 (UTC)

Where's Abbie Hoffman? I don't know, I don't know

This is not Wikipedia. It is not your job to decide what is funny and what is not. I am amazed at the amount of reactionary facism that first Wiki, and now Uncyclopedia haves shown. If you don't appreciate something, that doesn't give you liscence to delete it. Apparently the entire philosophy behind these things has been forgotten. You are pissing on the whole point of the exercise.

Actually you're right....this site isn't Wikipedia. But it IS the jobs of Admins to decide what is funny and what is not. If we didn't have standards the site would be filled with utter shite..... Incidently what IS the point of the exercise? -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Speaking of excercise, maybe you should go outside and get some. Get away from all these wikis which disapoint you, and do something worthwhile with your life. Hey - here's an idea - why don't you take the FREE wiki software, and start a TOTALLY FREE WIKI of your own, where you can let people DO WHATEVER THEY WANT? How cool would that be? You could be a visionary, and fully realize the philosophy behind the wiki. And best of all, you could stop bitching about how we run our website, since you obviously don't know what the hell you are talking about.

And speaking of pissing on things, I'm quite good at pissing on things. I have pissed on a large number of things in my life. The top-ten things I am most proud of having pissed on are:

10) A cat.

9) Snow. While writing is hard, I can draw pictures.

8) Myself. It took a few tries before I could walk and piss at the same time.

7) Everybody's fun who comes here. Seriously, nothing like a good banning or delete-rampage to "rain" on someone's parade.

6) Flowers. Lots and lots of flowers.

5) The sidewalk at college, 1.5 minutes before security came by and discussed (loudly) that it looked like someone was walking and pissing at the same time.

4) Splaka's User talk page.

3) The entire philosophy behind the wiki way.

2) My ex-girlfriend's new boyfriend's new camero.

1) My high school, the night I graduated. God that felt good. Still brings a smile to my face.

So there you have it - who ever said that wiki's weren't totally free and informative? They're overly imformative now! At least this one is. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 01:36, 3 March 2006 (UTC)

I'm not really quite sure someone who spends enough time on Uncyclopedia (not Wikipedia, which is arguably of some value to someone, but Uncylopedia) to get at least some semblance of an admin position can unironically tell me to go get some exercise.I know everyone finds flamewars incredibly enterntaining, and searching the internet for things you don't find funny must be both personally rewarding and easily accomplished, but it seems to me that such things, as well as say, making your own wikicity because someone doesnt like you, kinda suck.

Geez, you guys are so mean to the noobs. All he was doing was trying to claim all wikis as his forum for free speech. After all, the tagline "Anyone can edit" of course instantly equals "Anyone can do anything they want to, because it is a free country, free speech, and the First Amendment allows me to use and abuse a website that someone else pays for any way I see fit, and then whine like a little schoolgirl when they either a) don't instantly praise me for it, b) ban and revert my changes". </sarcasm>... Anywho: "This is not Wikipedia. It is not your job to decide what is funny and what is not." <-- what kind of argument is that? Does Wikipedia hire admin to decide what is funny and what is not? Because, as Mhaille said, Uncyc does that here, in fact most Admin are arbitrators and executors of the standards of funny here, because the main point of this wiki is to Be funny and not just stupid. --Splaka 02:06, 3 March 2006 (UTC)

In an argument, people sometimes use a technique called logical progression. This means that each consecutive point has some relation to the previous. There's also a technique whereby the speaker deviates from this, in fact breaking this chain. This may explain the understandable problems you had with the connection between those two statements, since they were not, as you astutely observed, connected! I offer my congratulations and the opportunity to learn more at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhetoric.

Actually, wikipedia pays me to decide what's funny and what's not. I just donate my time here by anonymously adding funny content I take off of that site. And I donate my timne there by taking the unfunny stuff off this site, and adding it to wikipedia. Because they aren't allowed to be funny, and we are. It's a win-win-win-win situitation. I'm what you'd call an "expert". If you were trying to call experts. Sir Famine, Gun ♣ Petition » 03:50, 3 March 2006 (UTC)

Wikipedia doesn't think I'm funny enough to bother paying me so I mark the hours as charitable contributions. Just don't tell the IRS that I'm scamming them out of tens of thousands of dollars in the form of "legal advice provided to a non-profit organization". --Sir gwax (talk) » Major KUN UotM FH++ F@H CM GD NS Bur. +S 05:21, 3 March 2006 (UTC)

VFH

Can you have a look at Template:VFH. Looks fine in FF, but I can't see whats causing the text to drop in IE. The actual template hasn't been edited for ages..... -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

What seems to be the symptom? --Splaka 02:04, 8 March 2006 (UTC)

The text appears about 30 pixels below the text box, in a layer over the footer of the page. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Appears to have been this edit. See if it is fixed now (algo reverted). --Splaka 09:07, 8 March 2006 (UTC)

Yep.....sorted. Hope the guilty party was flogged publicly. -- Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Slap me some skin

<ONX>hey, splaka, where can i find the redesigned uncyclopedia main pages (DOS, Oscar wilde day, etc)thanks.

See Wikipedia:Uncyclopedia#Main_Page_Holidays. --Splaka 23:42, 9 March 2006 (UTC)

Sig picture

Soo, why is your sig picture the WikiFur logo? Are you trying to tell us something? --Poofers 03:26, 14 March 2006 (UTC)

Not even close. Mine is an image I made for Dawg, who later made his own, so I used it to keep it from the orphanarium. Although I was made a systop on furry.wikicities.com by FORCE. *purrr* --Splaka 04:07, 14 March 2006 (UTC)

Mate?

“In Soviet Russia, Article randomly deletes YOU!!'”

~ Oscar Wilde on what you just did

Dude, WTF? You fricking deleted Haska. Why the ?@&# did you do that. Seriously, that was the best article I have written, and I tirelessly revised it, why the ramen noodles did you get rid of it. Nobody else seemed to have a problem and you walked up and went DIGGITYDIGGITYDELETED!!

Flameviper12 17:31, 22 March 2006 (UTC)

Todd deleted it first (I just checked the version he deleted, it was a piece of crap). It was re-created in pretty much the same form (but more unreadable, white on white text) later, so I deleted it again. Ask Todd why he deleted it first, all I did was delete something WORSE than what he deleted. --Splaka 04:55, 23 March 2006 (UTC)

Erm, wait a minute, no. Um, no, that's not what I wrote. I wrote something completely unlike that, what Todd deleted was indeed crap, I admit that, and I had about 30 seconds to write it. But the later version, which j00 delet3z0r3d, was actually a fine, if you can call any part of Uncyclo fine, piece of work. I don't know what in the ramen noodles you're talking about with "white on white text" but that rings no bells, I never did that. Also, erm, it was a completely different form than the first form...although it kinda had the same point it had multiple sections, paragraphs, and a funny template, eh? Oh, by the way, when you deleted Template:Censor you said that it was only on one page and there it was subst'ed, but really it wasn't, and when you deleted that page and the template you forever destroyed it...I could have added it to later articles, but noo, can't we have any eventualism? God, no. Not to come off as scathing, or rude even, just intended to seem a tad impolite. Actually, scratch that, as you do seem the only one to be able to retrieve it now, I shouldn't be a big poopy meaniepants, but anyway, erm...I'm too lazy to use Backspace so I guess my rambling will be forever immortalized. OK, that didn't make sense, but WeLkUm To MaH wUrLd!!!!!!!

... What the hell are you rambling about? The version I deleted was exactly the same as the one Todd deleted, except the text was white instead of black. I just did a side by side comparison. You've just created it again I see. As for the template, it was ugly and unformatted (you just indented the lines to <pre> it eh?) and unneeded. Anywho. You now have it in your user space Please go away. Kthx. --Splaka 03:42, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Jebany Menel

Why deleted You my article 'Jebany Menel' Kondzio15 ^@

Article yours written in Spanish? Other language perhaps?   t o m p k i n s  blah. ﺞوﻦ וףה ՃՄ ண்ஸ ފއހ วอฏม +տ trade websites 00:27, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Because the total content was "Jebany Menel (pronouced: Yeah-bunny Mae-nelle) - Very famous man, the is come from Poland. He likes drink jabol's and he lives in Warsaw now." and it was about someone with no wikipedia article and 7 total google hits, which means they are unnotable. Read Uncyclopedia:Vanity Policies 03:44, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Multi-ban

Hi, Spalka. I need to ban a I.P range in the spanish uncy's sister. Can you explain me how it's done?--Rataube 02:55, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Try m:Range_blocks, and this calculator might help. Or just tell me the IPs and I'll tell you what to block. --Splaka 03:48, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Thank you, the first link told me averything I need to know for now.--Rataube 11:18, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

VFP fix

It was a </div> tag...I SOOOOO deserve a cookie for that!  – Mahroww a.k.a. Minister Art E. Hooey  06:48, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Actually, the div at the end that you removed is needed too. No cookie for you! Sucker ^_^. --Splaka 08:06, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

No kidding, and it was ultra lazy too...I did a "copy and paste" but evidently ended up doing a "cut and paste" instead. After I write "I will not copy and paste </div> or any other 6 character tag," on the chalboard 100 times can I get a pat on the back?  – Mahroww a.k.a. Sir Hymie Rae Tooten  20:59, 24 March 2006 (UTC)

Ok. --Splaka 04:50, 25 March 2006 (UTC)

Speling on Euphemism

Hi Splaka,

Looks to me that the 22 Jan edit by <IP> of http://www.uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Euphemism did try to fix speling but inadvertedly scrapped most of the page. Your reversal undid the intended fix.

Then again, perhaps 'tired' is part of the joke and I'm just too tried to get it. (Get it? :))

Well, their "contribution" was 99.9% vandalism. I am not going to revert to their version just to get the correct spelling. Fix the spelling yourself if you want. --Splaka 04:50, 25 March 2006 (UTC)

Midnight Cowmouse Question

Greetings, Splaka, I have edited the Midnight Cowmouse article...does it have RV now? If not, how could I improve it? Any comments are appreciated. SnoopY 01:56, 27 March 2006 (UTC)

Sure. --Splaka 03:59, 27 March 2006 (UTC)

Think, don't suck.

Right. I'd like you to be a little more clear about WHY YOU DELETED GAME:ZORK/KANJITIME. Why? What do you mean to many links to article space, getting huffed? You deleted a page in the middle of Zork 3, so you have officially fucked up teh entire game. Congratz. So I'd like you to OR give me a very good reason for deleting the page, OR restore the page. I hope you ever read this, I don't seem to be the only one having problems with you deleting pages. Love, User:PBz0r

I actually found out there was a page you deleted which was erronous. How good of you! What I'm wondering now is why you delete random pages out of Zork. Pages which do work. Have you noticed that 60% of all deletes the last month are yours? Don't you think you need a break of deleting? You're just addicted to it.

Yes, it's me again. And this will be my last message. I read the deletion policy and I (think I) understand what you meant: the page was basically links to other pages. But... isn't that obvious for a zork-page? You know what, I'll stop freaking you out, and wait for an answer first. Pier.

Excuse me, YOU fucked up the entire game. You (if it was you) were linking to and creating zork pages out in the main article space (not prefixed with Game:Zork/). They are not random pages out of zork, they are PAGES NOT EVEN PROPERLY IN THE GAME. I actually fixed several of the Game:Zork pages you made, but some were just not worth fixing and were deleted, and I also deleted all the ones outside of the Game: namespace (I've tried moving all incorrectly placed pages, but it is way too much work, and the clueless users never learn). So, you should take your own advice. Please THINK, and don't SUCK at creating Zork pages so much (But contratz on sucking so much and making pages that do the same). As for me deleting 60%, I can guarantee, around 99% of the stuff I delete would be deleted within a week anyway. Much if it is by request on QVFD (such as pages moved to sister projects, or broken redirects). --Splaka 04:06, 28 March 2006 (UTC)

PS: Read these by Keitei: Uncyclopedia:Uncyclopedia Is Not My Job and Uncyclopedia:Laziness FTW. --Splaka 04:16, 28 March 2006 (UTC)

Smoke da' Bong!

Oh kindest sir, I wish to formally, sincerely, and deeply thank you for your efforts in bringing an end to the Battle of the Bong, a Flamewar that had consumed much of my resources and time. My deepest appretiations go to you for assisting my cause and propelling my side to victory! If ever you feel I could be of service, I would be honored to serve your any purpose.

--His Royal Majesty, Simulacrum Caputosis the Great20:15, 29 March 2006 (UTC)

Wha? All I did was ban him for having slightly dumber revisions than you! Heh heh. You're welcome. --Splaka 03:38, 30 March 2006 (UTC)

Uncyc Hackers?

By the way, someone tried to hack into my uncyc account. I came back from a game, and found 12 "change of password" e-mails. Apparently started from IP 65.110.6.40. It was reccomended that I inform you of this. Thanks, man. --epynephrin 02:12, 31 March 2006 (UTC)

I'll ask jason. But they should be harmless, just ignore them. --Splaka 05:21, 31 March 2006 (UTC)

thanks. I just changed my password, and filed the e-mail away. Probably a handful of morons looking for "trouble", which I'm far, far too lazy to give them. --epynephrin 04:08, 1 April 2006 (UTC)

Don't even bother changing the password. The email doesn't change it, it just offers a temporary secondary one. Just delete the emails. --Splaka 05:50, 1 April 2006 (UTC)

Blockage

Sorry dude, saw the block on RC and thought you'd accidentally blocked yourself. What's the deal anyway, the username looks exactly the same...? -- Sir Codeine K·