Wayne Brady
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“1000 points for Wayne Brady”
~ Drew Carey on Wayne Brady
“Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?”
~ Wayne Brady on ho's
“White people love Wayne Brady because he makes Bryant Gumble look like Malcolm X”
~ Negrodamus on Wayne Brady
“Wayne Brady can choke Master Toto anyday.”
~ Master Toto on Choking a Bitch
“I'm Wayne Brady, Bitch!”
~ Wayne Brady on Wayne Brady
Half-brother of more-famous Tom Brady, first cousin of Charles Pugh, and the black sheep of The Brady Bunch family, Wayne Brady is known among practitioners of High Necromancy as the final corporeal manifestation of the dreaded Ganondorf Dragmire, those who have survived extreme rochambeau contests with him have wondered, "Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?"
[edit] Early life
Born in Munich, Germany in 1992 AD, Brady spent much of his childhood huffing kittens, choking bitches, and Setting random buildings on fire (his own home on multiple occasions). He showed little interest in Necromancy until 994 BC, when he met a hobo who convinced the then impressionable Brady that his fingernail clippings could raise the dead. Brady gladly bought the clippings in exchange for a leprechaun sex slave, and proceeded to throw the clippings at his grandmother's dead body during her funeral, yelling something to the effect of "Come back, Grandma!". His parents abandoned him at the funeral, and Brady was determined to win over his parents by becoming the greatest necromancer the world has ever known.
[edit] History in Coconuts
Immediately after the funeral, Brady retreated to his longtime friend Black Jesus , who immediately took Brady under his wing as a student of Coconuts. Brady trained for years under the teachings of Black Jesus until 2007 when Black Jesus was killed by Jesus, Chuck Norris, Chesty Puller, and a company of Marines, but not before he could name Brady a full-fledged Coconuts.
Shortly after Black Jesus' death, Brady revived him through the power of Coconuts. Black Jesus proceeded to eat the Cock that killed him out of anger. Fun was had by all. Except for the Cock.
Brady went on to become a world-renowned Coconuts, eventually winning over his parents. Shortly after this, he became a wrestler on the world famous wrestling program Bitchdown! Soon to become the greatest world champion that the WWWAOB (World Wide Wrestling Association Of Bitches) had ever seen. After a brutal shooting of Dave Chapelle, he went on to befriend Dave to become World Tag Team Champions on RAW defeating the Legion of Doom and The Hart Foundation in a Three Way Tag match. After turning his back on Dave HOLY CRAP LOOK OUT FOR BABOONS!!! ONEONE111111WON! and the tag titles, he went on to win all three Heavyweight Titles on Raw, Smackdown, and ECW. He was dubbed the "Triple Crowned Universal Champion".
[edit] See also
