Websense
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“You can't touch this.”
~ MC Hammer on accessing an illegal webpage.
Contents |
[edit] Introduction and Rationale
It has been known that rogue states but also companies and universities put restrictions to Internet usage. These restrictions are so aggressive and perverse that the Internet experience of the end-user is completely compromised.
WebSense (IPAEng: ˈwɛbsɛnsɛsʌks) (a.k.a "Web'non'sense") comes to the rescue by providing stealth anonymity to the masses, allowing them to browse the Internet without restrictions. Due to this, WebSense is severely unpopular in specific non-secural countries; merely having WebSense software installed on your computer may land you in jail for two years.
[edit] Technical details
WebSense offers anonymous secure proxy servers that end-users can connect to. Once such a server is blocked, WebSense activates a new one and informs the users through encrypted e-mail to switch to it.
There is currently work carried out to integrate WebSense with the Onion Routing project in order to offer protection against traffic analysis.
WebSense is resilient to differential analysis attacks thanks to patented technologies being employed.
[edit] Websense categories
WebSense is used especially by these groups of people
- Activists
- Freedom fighters
- Retard Slut Whores
- The Chinese
- Students
- Nazis
If you belong to one of the categories above, you can apply for a free license to use WebSense. Please contact them mentioning this page.
[edit] Motto
The motto of WebSense is Putting the Sense back in the Web. As more content-filtering software packages are being sold and utilised in perimeter networks, the real message of the Internet got diluted. Therefore, in a wise move, WebSense adopted the motto of sensible Internet, and puts the sense back to where it belongs, the Internet itself. The other Websense motto is "De Heil Websense!".
[edit] Vandalism
This page has been vandalised twice already by the oppressors of freedom. Please help keep WebSense page up and running.
[edit] Preemptive actions
Thanks to donations from around the world, the WebSense international community raised US$20.000 to win the online auction and register the Internet domain WebsenseSucks.com so that no other people may use. Please join the new initiative to register WebsenseReallySucks.com and avoid corporate interference to the mission of Websense.
[edit] Parody
WebSense:Wikipedia makes fun of WebSense at the popular parody Website Wikipedia. In the sly humour of the Wikipedia hippies, WebSense is depicted as a content-filtering product aimed at restricting Internet access.
[edit] See also
WEBSENSE SUCKS!!! NO ONE EVER LIKES WEBSENSE!! IT LIMITS FREEDOM LIKE HITLER!! WEBSENSE IS LIKE HITLER KILLING AMERICA!! WHO IS WITH ME? (whoever is type your feelings about websense here
