Whistle

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ThaWhistle, more commonly known by his friends and family as "Whistle," or "Fatkid" (a name which has lead to the deaths of dozens) emerged onto the scene as a simple gamer and avid forum contributor. He was first truly recognized for his potention at www.totalbf2.com wherein he was able to flame, outwit and crush the insubordinate and foolish inhabitants. Perhaps his most brilliant masterpiece of flaming art was "The Massacre of Xaritix" (done with witty insults on a medium of pale emo face). In this masterful work, he manages not only to banish the fool and embarrass him in front of the entire community, but was able to stay the horrid emo beast for a time.

1 Whistle's Philosophies
- 1.1 An Incomplete Study of the Emo/Goth Psyche by ThaWhistle
2 Whistle at Liesure
3 Note

[edit] Whistle's Philosophies

Whistle was the first to establish that the Nazi culture and the current "emo" or "emotional" culture of contemporary American society are closely related. He states that:

--University of Emo Studies. "Emo Culture and It's Correlation to Nazi Germany" 4-credit course instructed by Mr. Whistle himself.

Where Hitler is the tyrannous and truly evil (but all around nice guy) dictator of Nazi germany, and n1 is a given sample of Nazi characteristics. This formula shows that the entire emo culture can be simply summed up in its direct relation to hitler and his antics. (see Hitler's Sexy Parties).

Perhaps the most famous of Whistle's philosopies, however is his revolutionary, analytical paper on the manneurisms and style of emos with direct references to and supportive commentary and quotes from Xaritix himself. Below is an exact, unedited copy of his first work, recovered from the archives of the Vatican by a rogue gang of pirates.

[edit] An Incomplete Study of the Emo/Goth Psyche by ThaWhistle

The Following is a simplified transcript. The Original had different fonts and colors for different speakers.

This is the thread the study originally started in [1]

Summary of edits:
1.01 - added quote.
1.02 - added introduction(current build)
1.03 - added quote, new section added
1.04 -added quote, updated traits section

“lol, dude you set yourself up for stuff and it keeps building up.”-Jewish Mafia

And it did! It turned into this…

The Mind of an Emo

Introduction

Contribution from: Psycho.Killa
Of Xaritix

Xaritix, introduced first in the TotalBF2 Off-Topic community in May of 2006, made his first popular thread in June or 2006. Titled "No, This Can't Be!!", his thread quickly became famous because of its radical context. Sticking to his far fetched beliefs, Xaritix refused to admit his obsessive love for Paris Hilton as "irregular", going off the topic when people would try to offer help. It would seem as though he meant to get the attention. Instead of admiting his wrong, he came up with more and more radical ideas. In June of 2006, he introduced a new topic in his radical series; his sister. Many beliefs erupted from this introduction. Some believed he really had a lesbian sister. Others believed it was a cry for attention. Another common belief is that his sister was created as a shield to deflect personal attacks against him, coming from behind his shield to express his love, and retreating back again, posing as his sister when things got hot.

His series of radical ideas are as follows:

June 2006: Paris Hilton obsession with Sims 2 self portraits
[http://forums.fevergaming.com/showthread.php?t=71304]

June 2006: Lesbian sister who comes onto his account (Brikin118)
[http://forums.fevergaming.com/showthread.php?t=73725]

July 2006: Admited to being goth/emo
[http://forums.fevergaming.com/showthread.php?t=86272]

July 2006: Got/emo girlfriend
[http://forums.fevergaming.com/showthread.php?t=86272]
Many believe that most, if not all of his claims are fictional.

Contribution from: Whistle

Xaritix’ sister might be real, they spell many of the same words wrong though among other mannerisms and such. His outlandish posting gets a response from the community which can only be described as “lolomgwtf?” Lately, nothing has been seen from his sister(atleast at Fever Gaming). The reaction from the community is mixed, some older members (cheesews and ZemonerZ) seem to have stopped caring about anything he posts at all and anything related to him. Others have seem to be befriending him by supporting him. One thing is clear about Xaritix, he is an Emo. Let us dive into the Wonderful World of Emo, and explore the mind of the Emo/Goth

Overview of the Reticulated Internet Emo
OMG... I just came to a realization Emos (Homo Sapien Sapien Emous) are actually genetic offshoots of Hitler, as can be seen based on the hair patterns and love the higher usage of drugs among the more radical emos often called goths or colloquially "fucking faggots". Name one Jewish Emo... DO IT!!! Find me one! How about a black emo? They are all either central European in origin (for the most part, basing out of Germanic tribes from long ago, the soon to be emo people spread throughout Europe when their tribes spread out) or Asian. Much like the original axis powers of WW2.

Therefore Emo=Nazis. Therefore Emos are anti-Semitic and have technology years ahead of everyone except the English, Americans and Russians. We must take a portion of those Emus captive and study their behavior and intellectual patterns; much could be learned from these people... (Edit) Obviously not their fashion sense... which is atrocious... or their taste in music... also suckass. Perhaps a test of ballistic penetration against the Emu would serve a proper entry level test
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Contribution from Keel: “I think the Emo's true power actually eminates from their hair. The more outrageous the hair, the stronger the power.

I think the Emo plague is spreading not just from human to human, but from human to beast. Hard proof of this theory is shown below:

This leads me to believe the virus is either airborn, or sexually transmitted. That latter making more sense, as we all know Emo's are capable of some fucked up shit.”

Further Contribution from Keel

“Quote:
Originally Posted by JEWISHMAFIA
Edit: LOL! dont ruin a song like that please!

I didn't have to. I think Queen foresaw the Rise of Emo...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen
Mama,just killed a man,
Put a gun against his head,
Pulled my trigger,now hes dead,
Mama,life had just begun,
But now Ive gone and thrown it all away-
Mama ooo,
Didnt mean to make you cry-
If Im not back again this time tomorrow-
Carry on,carry on,as if nothing really matters

All the signs are there.”

Other:
Quote:
Originally Posted by AviationOrdnance
OMG you know emo girls don't have ass or tits.

”why do you think theyre emo? ”-shock_troop42

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The “I have a girlfriend Thread” Analysis.

-This thread displayed many of xaritix’ traits which could be called “emo”.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rantings of an “Emo”
Quoth the Xaritix
Commentary By Whistle
Quote # 1“I wanted to let you all know that I officially have a girlfriend! she is some goth girl who calls herself Raven, I don't know her real name, but we went to the mall and stuff today and saw "Lady in the Water", and it turns out I am not hopeless! I now am a normal 16 year old emo kid!

Afterwards I hanged out with her and her goth friends, who, once you get to know them, are real nice, just misunderstood

I just thought I would let you know”

Let it be noted that nowhere does he show proof of them actually going out. They merely hung out for a while. See Below.

Quote # 2“No, we went to the mall and stuff, we knew eachother for a whial, we've been going to school together for like 5 years now, but after we went to the mall and stuff I hung out with her and her goth creepy friends, she said she likes me, whoooooo! Lol”

“And she has shoulder length blackish red hair, she has a black clothing, and pale skin

The funny thing is that her friend "Orphius" looked at me funny when I asked what his real hair color was, he had black hair, and is pretty much the steriotype of a goth, he says he lost his virginity in a graveyard with his goth girlfriend, wierd, lol”

Quote #3“Yea well if Paris Hilton walked up to my door and asked to borrow my phone, I would dump Raven like aftermath of eating mexican food, lol”

It would appear the emo lacks certain people skills, such as commitment and a fear of STDs

The following is a response to the “HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” from the community.
Quote #4 “She is not the kind of goth girl that writes poems about cutting themselves, she looks kinda like Amy Lee”
As you can see, the emo/goth culture has varying castes of hardcore “SuperEmos” which can be seen at the bottom of Quote #9

Quote #5 “She is the only girl at school that talks to me, all the other girls hate me, but the goth kids are my friends”
Xaritix, a self described “emo/goth”(see the following quote), seems to imply the other emos are too good for him and only the Goths hang out with him, however it may be the other way around. There may be a leveling of Goths>Emos or Emos>Goths, there is not yet enough evidence to determine this.

“so does this mean you are a emo/goth ? what a combo.....oh boy what happened to the old days.. (even though i was not alive but hey I heard stories)

PICS? SHENS? –Lt.Drop”
Xaritix’ response
Quote #6“Just emo, not entirely a goth wierdo, just an emo/goth”

“Guy:1 So, yea man i totally hooked up with this one chick and she totally digs me...

Guy 2:whats her name??

Guy 1:Uhhh i dunno?? Her nickname is Raven but shes tottally diggin me after the scary movie we saw, TOTALY connection man!

Guy2: BUT YOU DONT KNOW HER FRIGGEN NAME?

guy 1; So?

Guy 2: HOW CAN YOU BANG HER IF YOU CANT EVEN SAY HER NAME?? OR EVEN KNOW HER NAME?!?!?!”-JewishMafia
“She goes by the name Raven”
“yay you knew a chick for one day! welcome to middle school!”
“I am in high school”ß As it can be seen the Emo takes things more literally then they are meant to be, just after this post JewishMafia unleashed his common sense upon Xaritix.
“lol, no hes saying thats middle school level stuff....”

“I could never date an emo. They have really poor decision making skills, and have a habit of changing the subject all the time.

’Want to go out?’ – ‘Whatever, I don't care.’
’What would you like for Christmas?’ – ‘I don't like Christmas. I don't care.’
’Is it cold outside?" - "Fuck you, you trend whore.’
’Where is my razor?’ – ‘I haven't touched it. Honest. Could you ring for an ambulance, quickly?’ “ –Keel
It can be seen here the emos have varying mindsets as opposed to a single brain shared by all the Emos. However their decision making skills (as seen in their hairstyles) is either poor, or non-existent

Quote #7 “Jesus, you could of atleast be happy for me, Raven is very nice for a goth girl, and she is pretty cute”

“This great, i really dont understand howcome Xaritix is so damn prone to getting picked on. If yous top posting stupid topics and stupid replies maybe you'll gain some respect from us and a little less ridicule.” – JewishMafia

Despite this being told to Xaritix time and time again(mostly about his stalker-like addiction to Paris Hilton) he has not ceased his ludicrous posting habits, and therefore has brought laughter and joy to millions(dozens) of forum readers everywhere.(Originally at TotalBF2, then at FeverGaming, and was directed to PBnation under the guise of it being a place to help him)

Quote #8“I am german/polish/russian and am an emo, I used to be a member of the nerd (sapien nerdius) subculture at school, but most recently I have become an emo, but only by what the popular kids at school label me, and I have taken it up as a title of mine, and I was doing better since my Paris Hilton thread*, I have a girlfriend now, sheesh”

The above is a response to my initial hypothesis of Emo, he proves me possibly connection of Hitler and Emo with his posted ethnicity.
*note: “The Paris Hilton Thread” was non-stop hilarity and showed the obsession of Paris Hilton held by Xaritix.

Are you two officially boyfriend/girlfriend? Was there an exchange of "yes, we are going out"s? – PsychoKilla
This was clearified later, after many hours of not getting a response, see Quote #11

Quote #9 “I am not gay, and here are some things me and Raven have in common:

-We both like Evanescence
-We both like scary movies
-We both like the color black
-We both have an appearance that scares small children, lol

And she is nice, unlike other goth kids, like her creepy friend who calls himself "Orphius", he dresses all in black, has "666" tatooed on his arm, and lost his virginity in a cemetary, creepy”
^Wow… just wow… I should write a research paper about the mind of the emo. Oh wait… I am!
As pointed out Following Quote #4, there may be varying levels of Emo and Goth, this “Orphius” may be of a more secluded Emo/Goth Nature. I must applaud his ability to scare young children, it is the sign of a real man, or in this case, an emo. This is the one manly trait that is diminished by emos, such as body hair with butches.
“Why do you keep misspelling orifice.”-Wreck
Quote #10“Orphius, I think it is like a greek god or something, but it is not oraphus(Xaritix corrected Orifice, thinking he meant Oraphus, which in actuality, appears to be nothing)”

Here it can be seen the Emo has knowledge of the ancients, possibly passed down by the generations knowing full well the Emos may have needed this information to display at a forum.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PsYcHo.KiLLa
So Xaritix...

Did you two exchange verbal agreement that you are boyfriend/girlfriend?

Quote #11 ”We never really said that, but we talked on the phone and agreed to go out next week, and even if we are just friends, then holy sh*t I have a friend who is a girl and she is the only girl that even talks to me”
It can be seen here once and for all, Xaritix is in fact NOT going out with this girl “Revan” as of 11:28PM EDT, July 23rd 2006.
“lol, she isn't a girl friend... weve confirmed that now...”-JewishMafia
The above is the first in-forum confirmation of our beliefs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by PsYcHo.KiLLa
http://xaritix.ytmnd.com/

Quote #12 “What the fuck was that? I said maby I could get a fake ID so I could legally "do it" with Paris Hilton, ass”
Here is proof that Emos not only possess horrendous spelling/grammar skills, but also have tempers that are easily unturned by YTMNDs. It is possible that YTMND is the Anti-Emo.

Update 1.01

In response to this entire article prior to the 1.01 update.
Xaritix posted the Following:
Quote #13
“Wow. All I can say is Wow, you are a strange person”
“Well, as they say, it takes one to know one. ”-IU2002
As said by the internet deity, IU2002, it is evident Xaritix is not only a strange person, but Whistle.*

*Whistle is way to cool to be xaritix, the above is merely sarcasam, it was part of a reactionary joke on the FeverGaming forums.

Quote #14 “WHAT THE FREAKING CRAP ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? Whistle?”
“dont mind me, im pulling an EA by releasing my patch too early.”

Quote #15 “Well Raven is not like super creepy, she is more emo than goth, just asociates herself with goths, she looks somewhat like Amy Lee, and you, lonewolf, should be ashamed of yourself for causing that girl to kill herself, and I am not like some sort of like sex maniac like other guys, because I am planning to lose my virginity to well, guess who (One can only guess this particular emo specimen still retains his unexplainable attraction to the hotel bedsheet semen stain byproduct, Paris Rutherford Hilton.)

Her friend Orphius is another story, he wears all black, has a tatoo that says "666" on his hand, and has a satanic pentogram tatooed on his chest, and stuff

Speaking of which, this is my 666th post, and I will read a quote from one of Orphius's poems: Satan will eat your children!!!

lol, happy Xaritix's six-hundred sixty-sixth post everyone, lol

But seriously, Raven is a nice girl ”
Lonewolf is a legend among men…. He shall be rewarded when he gets to Paradise. You on the other hand are actually being drawn into the inner circle of Goths so you can be sacrificed to Satan… I can’t believe I didn’t see this before! It’s so simple. Don’t drink the juice…. BTW I’m guessing Orhpius is fucking flatter than a 10 year old. *scientific mode on* The Goth often has low muscle mass, as a result of poor diet, lack of exercise(cutting, albeit physical activity does not stimulate muscle growth) It can also be seen that the Emo may be pray to the Goth which may show a ranking structure. Emos are relatively independent docile creatures and only have 3 natural enemies; the razor blade, The Jew and the Cool kid. Goths were introduced to this land by the hand of God so good Christians could stone them and hang, draw and quarter them publicly. In their invasion it seems the Goths have enslaved many emos, using some as sacrifices to Satan, and David Hasselhauf.

Quote #16 “I would be emporor of Germany” In response to –“The causes of WWII were directly related to WWI. I wonder what the world would be like if the axis won?”-Psycho.Killa Here we can see that the Emos are infact Nazis and looking to restore the Third Reich. Note the poor spelling and grammar also. Here is further proof
Quote:
Originally Posted by Xaritix
The real war crime of World War II was when we dropped two nuklear bombs on Japan, killing hundreds of thousands of innocent civilian men, women, and children

I was watching a show on the History Channel where this guy survived the bombings as a child, and he told all the grusome sh*t that happened, like babies getting their heads blown off by the blast, its sick

”wow really? no holocaust? amazing...”-Whistle. It also seems that the Emos will commonly deny the Holocaust.

Update 1.03 & 1.04
Traits of the Emo and Goth
-Emos strive to be Hitler, they are anti-Semitic which is seen in their fashion (slanty hair, lots of dark clothing) Emos also deny the Holocaust on a regular basis(see Quote #16)

-the complete lack of decision making skills, as can be seen in both their hairstyles, taste in music and general behavior

-The Emo is typically thin, and wears tight pants, Goths while being similar, wear the opposite, often large baggy clothing with clunky metal attachments.

-the emo listens to music of the emo genre, Goths often listen to darker more moody music which resembles the call of a woman going through the throes of PMS.

-it would seem emos and Goths have differing levels of “coolness” in their world. It is undetermined which is above the other or if they are equal, but have internal sub-groupings.

-It has been successfully established the Goth reigns over the Emo, but allows the Emo to roam free for the most part, only enslaving them when they seek bondage partners or sacrificial material.

-YTMND sites seem to bother Emos more than normal people(as can be seen in Quote # 12

-while displaying knowledge of certain topics, it would appear the emo is rather incapable at making judgements.

A Further Look at the Mind of an Emo
“I heard on the News about a "Conservative family values" plan, which is an attempt to get congress to ban Gay Marriage, Abortion, and teaching evolution in school, I have compiled a "Conservative Agenda", in which as their power over congress grows, their oppression grows

Stage 1: Bans on gay marriage and abortion, and flag burning
Stage 2: Banning of teaching evolution in school
Stage 3: Homosexuality and Premaritial sex results in prison time
Stage 4: Stem Cell research on eliminating the homosexual gene
Stage 5: Nationwide ban on pornography and alcahol
Stage 6: Putting a cross on the US flag
Stage 7: Forced conversions to Christianity...

Well, not really, but things might get out of hand and end up like that, so what do you think on this?”
“you have no source for what ur saying. therefore we cannot tell what is real(or accurate) and what isn’t”-Whistle
“Xaritix, that is one of the most ignorant posts I have seen in my entire life. May a bus run you over.”-Forest
“Thats not funny at all. As I said in another thread, ROOTS was funnier than that.”-SackyNut
“Can someone lock this before some eydjut starts debating it.”-

Quote:
Originally Posted by 4thebeavers
I think you are fucking stupid

“Agreed...”-Gnomey

This should be relatively straightforward… The Emo undoubtably lacks any sort of rationalizing or common sense. This is possibly inherited from Hitler. Was there even an argument in his post? Or just incoherent Emobabble?

Bear in mind, ladies, gentlemen and gypsies, that the original means of conveyance for this masterpiece of literary art was the primitive invention known as "the forums" and any incoherence may be directly lended to improper resources available for this artist to conduct his work.

Once again, a clearer version(commentary distinguishable from actual text) can be found here. [2]

[edit] Whistle at Liesure

Few know that Whistle is quite the body builder and simply cannot go through his day without chugging and choking down his huge, gallon tub of Whey Protein (100% pure of course, anything else severely messes with the delicate balance of his innards), followed by a 1/2 tonne sack of creatine.