Will Ferrell
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Did you mean Will Feral or Will Farel?
“Will, if you want the people to laugh, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Will Ferrell's humour
“Will Ferrell is a god walking among men.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Will Ferrell
“Wanking. I meant wanking among men.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Will Ferrell
Will Ferrell was an actor best known for his lack of humor and general ability to edit things on Uncyclopedia and other websites.(example: everything he's ever done). He also played the drums as his alter ego Chad Smith (and on certain occasions, cowbell) for the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Many believe the highlight of his career was his drum solo on the song Moby Dick from their best-selling album, Thriller. Despite the fact that every single last one of his movies has been terrible, a lot of people still saw Blades of Glory. These people are commonly known as idiots. Or The Sons of Glondor.
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Contents |
[edit] Will’s Rough Beginnings
Will Ferrell began his career as a Burger King employee in Africa. Accused of eating all of the food supplies in the stock rooms, Ferrell was constantly transferred to different managements of this popular chain restaurant. After eating all of Africa’s food supplies, Ferrell was finally placed on the Burger King black list to never be hired again. Unfortunately, Africa still struggles through life without Burger King today becoming the world’s leading country of starvation. It is also now known that in his earlier years Ferrell was a very strong communist/terrorist. It turns out that he was behind 9/11 and his heroes are Joseph Stalin and Osama BenLaden.
[edit] Gay Porn Stint
There was a short and little known time in Will's life where he was a supporting actor in a few gay porno movies. He acted under the stage name Bill "Peanut" Faryl. His rolls included a scene with Eric Estrada in the critically acclaimed "CHaPS" and also a starting roll with John Holmes in "12 and One Half Inches" (of course with JH being the 12 and Will making up the other half).
[edit] Stardom
Lorne Michaels discovered Ferrell on the streets and hired him to be the first strip teaser to appear on Saturday Night Live. Introducing stripping to the popular night comedy, Michaels hoped to reach ratings of at least three viewers, beyond which the show has ever seen.
Will Ferrell appeared on Saturday Night Live in a provocative male-thong hoping to achieve the sophistication Lorne was searching for. Although Ferrell’s physique of being a fat ass (not as fat as my mother's ass though) did not achieve this dream, it finally made audience members laugh, making it the first time this had ever happened in SNL history.
Fearful of creating mass confusion and World War III, however, the Bush administration banned the sketch from ever being aired again and begged Will to never take his shirt off in public again. Still Ferrell has made a common effort to take his clothes off in every one of his movies claiming to be "sticking it to the man."
[edit] Development of Becoming Not Funny
After Ferrell’s big break, Lorne Michaels eagerly strived to keep Ferrell from leaving the show, giving the actor both his house and children as payments making Ferrell the highest paid cast member in this history of Saturday Night Live. Unfortunately, Michaels’s attempts of making the show funnier failed after having hired illegal Mexican immigrants to write Ferrell's sketches.
[edit] The Sketches of Mental Retardation
[edit] Cheerleaders
One of his most notable early attempts at non-humor was as the cheerleader Greg, the counterpart of Dan Quayle's equally non-funny Bartholomew. This was only moderately successful; while the cheerleader sketches did not contain anything remotely funny, they were not unfunny enough for humor to be derived from the lack of humor. However, the sketches still continued to be featured on SNL for many years. No one knows why.
[edit] Jeopardy!!!!
A breakthrough came, however, with several parodies of the popular game show Jeopardy. Ferrell's impression of host Alex Trebek with a British accent was so bad that, combined with Sir Anthony Hopkins's portrayal of someone who sounded vaguely like John Jacob Jingelheimer Schmidt, the sketches were an immediate success. Viewers were collapsing with laughter at the thought of anyone seriously being amused by Ferrell.
[edit] Lipton
A British accent was also given to Ferrell's impression of the refined American TV show host James Lipton. Critics and viewers alike agreed that portraying someone no one had heard of before and doing it with an ineptness that could not be surpassed was just about the funniest thing ever. Lipton himself, however, was not pleased with the portrayal, reportedly shouting "I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU MOTHERFUCKER!" to Ferrell on several occasions.
[edit] Cowbell
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Another highlight in Ferrell's non-comedy on SNL on TV on Earth was the "Cowbell sketch". Ferrell was aided in his lack of humor by guest host Christopher Walken. The sketch was a supposed reenactment of Blue Oyster Cult playing "Don't Fear the Reaper". Basically, Ferrell strapped a cowbell to his penis and made animal sounds for several minutes. This happened multiple times. Audiences were amazed at the new highs Ferrell and Walken had reached in the area of not being funny. Today that sketch stands out above all others as the one people think of when they think "hilariously not funny".
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[edit] Inspiration
Still, Will pursued his career as a comedian, describing his inspiration to do so in an interview: "I was watching that Adam Sandler movie, Gone With the Cowbell, and I thought to myself, 'Wow! That's so not funny, it's almost funny!' Then I thought, 'Wow! What if someone's whole career was like that? Wouldn't that be hilarious?' So I did that. And now, I'm almost as talented as Adam Sandler." Will also said that Blue Cheese was a big source of inspiration.
[edit] Fighting Food
Unfortunately, life quickly got worse for Ferrell as he developed a severe case of obesity, or what some may describe as being a “fat lard". Concerned fans watched as he was carried out of his house by a tractor day by day.
His fellow brat-pack members said of Ferrell:
- "Ferrell was a porker." - Don Knotts
- "I swear, Will was like 680lbs." - Jackie Wilson
- "Will sweated all the time, mostly into his food." - Oscar de la Wilson
- "There was once a John Wilson, but Will tripped and crushed him." -Wilson Phillips
- "Will Ferrell was morbidly obese." - Woodrow Wilson
- "Who's Will ferrel? ." - Goku
[edit] Weight Change
One year later, Ferrell made a conscious attempt to eat something other then hot dogs and sausages, making Ferrell become less obese and more of just a huge fat ass.
[edit] Being Chad Smith
By night, Ferrell changes into Chad Smith by putting on a blue hat. When in Chad form he is able to eat the souls of many by rocking the shit out of a drum kit in the super smash hit band Red Hot Chili Peppers. Will also shifts his shape when he is in a career slump and needs money, thus Stadium Arcadium.
[edit] Trivia
- Will Ferrell has been a cameo appearance in Snakes On A Plane (also known as Motherfucking Snakes On A Motherfucking Plane) as one of the snakes in the cowbell bay.
- Will Ferrell is close friends with Flam Malf.
- Will Ferrell has the guiness world record for having sex with tomatoes.
- Ron Burgandy owns the world and all whom reside within it 8======D
