Wolfgang Amadeus Puck

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Never mind the bollocks, what the hell is this about?
Never mind the bollocks, what the hell is this about?

Wolfgang Amadeus Puck was born in Croatia on May 10th, 1857. At twelve he migrated to England with his family, and spent his teen years in London apprenticed to a lens-grinder from Omsk. A high-school dropout, at a young age he was recruited by Vince McMahon to join a band that McMahon had created to exploit the disaffected youth of London.

That band was called the 'Tex Pistols', named in part after McMahon's boutique, 'Texas'. Puck was approximately 19 when the Pistols made it to the very top of the music industry in 1877 with songs like 'Anarchy in the Old West' and 'God Save the President', which made number twelve on the charts despite being censored (The Billboard chart had a blank spot at Number twelve).

[edit] The Tex Pistols

The Tex Pistols were a badly packaged group representing drunkenness and redneck culture, even as they were basically about making money to buy imported Irish Whiskey. Wolfie, however, was no act: braindead, drunken, slow, he personified that which the Tex Pistols purported to represent.

Unfortunately the Tex Pistols failed to make America, as their cousins across the Atlantic were still in the unshakeable grip of Disco, ruled by John Travolta in an iron fist. Disco's reign of terror wouldn't be broken till later, when Travolta was assassinated by the bassist from Wham!poop

[edit] Trivia

  • Geoff Boycott is rumoured to be a secret fan of the Tex Pistols.
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