World Domination Plan

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"All your Internet searches are belong to us."

~ Google on Google's World Domination Plan

"I love ponies, bunnies, kittens, mittens, shmittens, sh*ttens and most of all, the f*cktard under the name Google."

~ George W. Bush on Google's World Domination Plan

"In Soviet Russia, Google dominates YOU!!!"

~ Russian reversal on Google's World Domination Plan

"Hehehe… We LOVE our plan! So far, so good… just like cream cheese."

~ United Nations on Google's World Domination Plan

"Oh, we think that we are NEXT!"

~ Starbucks on Google's World Domination Plan

"Your mom sucks balls."

~ Your dad on Google's World Domination Plan

Started in 2004 and will end on Infinite Years After, this plan was started by the evil fishmonger named Google (the new name of merger of Procter & Gamble, Microsoft, Disney, Wal-Mart, Google and Time Warner last 2004), now located at their Volcano Lair, found on an island somewhere.

Contents

[edit] Developments in the past

Google's predecessor, the Chinese, invented money. Its purpose was to hypnotize hookers to sell themselves. The Chinese proved money as effective mind-control device. Then, a newly-formed company in Beijing (then moved to Narnia) called Google acquired the whole China for $1. Google then diversified from a mind-control company to a slavery company. Google controlled the minds of those idiot conquerors thus creating the world a colony of Google.

[edit] Colonized vs. Google

Google felt that these people were tutored by monsters like your mom by saying AAAAAAAAA! to them, creating a new word "revolution." About 5 out of 7 people filed a case against Google at Google's courts, but by using common sense, they've failed and were killed by returning back to the 1200 BC or whatever you call it and starting the Grey Death thingy.

[edit] Google to United Nations

After the World (er, Google) Wars, Google renamed itself as United Nations and it created so-called "nations" to diminish Google's name in history. But still, there're wars as United Nations planned so like the f*ckingdamnbastard Korean War (or Corean War as those "Coreans" said to me when we were at Starbucks), Vietnam War (or Viet Nam War as those 'Viet Nam Ease" said to me when we were at Jollibee if you know that fastfood chain! LOL), Persian Gulf War (nevermind) and Google's former president and CEO (he got fired because ha can't even spell the word "Google" at the 2000 UN [or Google] Summit) George W. Bush's a.k.a. the childlike Dubya as the folks at Ponies and Bunnies called him (and also Betty Crocker and her customer Denzel Crocker) War on Terra (don't be confused from the War of Terra Cotta in 4000 AD and Terra Cotta vs. Flan vs. Pudding in 20 AD).

[edit] In association with Blizzard

Another one of Google's shifty schemes was to invest 38 cents in Blizzard and actually acquiring technology to let other player characters to literally "jump" out of the computer and kill the occupants of that country, so far unsuccessful due to the lack of countries on Earth and because these so called "guys who jump out of your computer whenever you play World of Warcraft and start attacking you" have an odd fetish to stickers that contain the phrase "1337" or "leet".

[edit] The new Google

The United Nations formed the new Google as the Internet company as the original Google knew that you can control the people's minds with just a click away. Google now knew that it is also easy to monopolize the whole economy by acquiring all companies existing. The UN banned Coca-Cola from selling their beverages worldwide because they are KKK. Google then acquired Coca-Cola for $8,500 in 2004. Google then merged with the companies listed above. Just scroll!!!

[edit] Other acquisitions

2004

2005

2006

[edit] See also

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