Worst 100 Nonexistent Words of All Time

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100. April Fools Jokes
99. Bands
98. Cars
97. Celebrity Endorsements
96. Children's Books
95. Colours
94. Computer Games
93. Cryptic Crossword Clues
92. Direct-to-Video Movies
91. Diseases Your Ex-Wife Could Have
90. Firefox extensions
89. Food
88. Football variants
87. Inventions
86. Lists
85. Locations
84. Look alikes
83. Make Out Songs
82. Money Making Schemes
81. Movies
80. Nonexistent Words
79. Numbers
78. Nutty Conspiracy Theories
77. Overused Star Trek Episode Plots
76. Pick-up lines
75. Pokemon Cash-Ins
74. Porn Movies
73. Porn Stars
72. Quick Detections that an Uncyclopedia page sucks
71. Reasons to become a Christian
70. Reflections on 2005
69. Reflections on 2006
68. Reflections on 2007
67. Reflections on 2008
66. Remakes
65. Restaurants
64. Ringtones
63. Self Help Books
62. Sequels
61. Sexual Perversions
60. Short Poems
59. Sitcom Catchphrases
58. Songs
57. Songs about Seagulling
56. Songs Referencing Paedophilia
55. Songs To Have Sex To
54. Spinoffs
53. Suicide Ideas
52. Superheroes
51. Things
50. Things to do during Christmas
49. Things to Put In An IV
48. Things to say on a First Date
47. Things to Stick your Dick in
46. Toys
45. TV Programs
44. Uncyclopedia In-Jokes
43. Video Game Movies
42. Video Game Systems
41. Ways to be Circumcized
40. Ways to Deliver Bad News
39. Ways to Die (Best)
38. Ways to Die (Worst)
37. Ways to Start a Novel
36. Ways to Win an Argument
35. Wonders of the World


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Contents

[edit] 107. Marshmelloea (marsh-mellow-eeee-ah!)

  • (v.) The act of adding a marshmellow into tea absorbing all the tea.

[edit] 106. Nuclear (nook-ya-ler)

  • (adj.) A weapon used to fuck up those Japanese sons-of-a-bitches.

[edit] 105. Questrillanium (kwez-trill-gork-oot)

  • (n.) A Journey with no point at all.

[edit] 104. Fantasmal (fan-taz-mal)

  • (adj.) Describe something that's so great, it's bad, if that makes any sense.

[edit] 103. Whalin (wale-in)

  • (v.) To crawl inside of a whale.

[edit] 102. Youga (yoo-ga)

  • (n.) Bendable cheese.

[edit] 101. Dwachz (duh-wah-chiz)

  • (n.) 1. An Asian person who works at a tollbooth and gives you the incorrect amount of change. 
     2. Any Asian person.

[edit] 100. Martinated (mar·tin·at·ed)

  • (n.) Getting owned by someone named Martin.

[edit] 99. abdicake (b'd-kk)

  • (v.) To give up the last piece of cake to someone else.

Example: Is anyone going to eat the last piece of cake? I was but I'll abdicake in your favour.


[edit] 98. adminisphere (d-mn's-fîr')

  • (n.) The levels of management where big, impractical, and counterproductive decisions are made.

Example: The administration thought it'd be a good idea to replace all 700 of our servers with three mainframes as a way of speeding things up. I'm telling you their brains don't get enough air in that adminisphere.

[edit] 97. bafoon (b-fn')

  • (n.) One who is foolish and distinctly resembles a baboon.


[edit] 96. banectomy (b-nek't-m)

  • (n.) The removal of bruises and other discrepancies on a banana.


[edit] 95. wafro (w -fr )

  • (n.) A white person with tight curly hair, like Bert Convy


[edit] 94. winvelope (wn'v-lp)

  • (n.) Any fancy envelope with an address window cutout. Any dual-pane envelopes that include a return address window.


[edit] 93. JABUPS (jä-bps)

  • (acro.) Jargon Articulated By Unintelligible Public Servants.


[edit] 92. gangloot (gan'glt)

  • (n.) A person who leaves all their ski passes on their jacket just to impress people.


[edit] 91. ebanatic (-b-nt'k)

  • (n.) An online bidder who bids relentlessly on an item until he wins without regard to the actual cost - Almost always bidding more than retail.


[edit] 90. oralgasmic (ôr'l-gz'mk)

  • (adj.) A taste that is so great that it puts you on the verge of an orgasm.

Example: The cake girl in The Matrix: Reloaded.


[edit] 89. rebootilence (r-bt-'lns)

  • (n.) An uncomfortable amount of time one has to wait while rebooting their computer.


[edit] 87. zampeachie (zm-p'ch)

  • (n.) A person who consumes a number of peaches while being threatened by a green flamingo.


[edit] 86. quotimer (kw-t-m'r)

  • (n.) One who insists on quoting from other instant messenger conversations to make a joke in another.


[edit] 85. lamien (lm-'n)

  • (n.) A person who is purported to be evil and frightening, but is in fact just lame. Origins: From "Damien", antagonist from "The Omen" films.

Example: "Freddy Krueger may have been scary at one time, now he's just a lamien."


[edit] 84. negatile (ng'-tl)

  • (n.) An area of the bathroom floor where, somehow, the scale registers one to be five pounds lighter.


[edit] 83. deadvertise (dd'vr-tz')

  • (v.tr.) To advertise and promote political causes by death. Origins: The combination of dead and advertise.

Example: Terrorism is nothing but the art of deadvertising.

  • 2 To de-advertise something (advertise against). Such as in a political campaign.

[edit] 82. paddywaggle (pd'-wg-l)

  • (v.) To screw around.

Example: Hey, Patrick, if you paddywaggle on your way home, you'll get run over!


[edit] 81. Jesufied (g-z-fd)

  • (v.in.) To be martyred. To take the wrap for something knowing they will get in the least amount of trouble. Also: Jesuficated - To be Jesufied while everyone else gets off scott free.

Example: Knowing his friends would get in more trouble than he, Ray Jesufied himself and told the police officer all the booze was his.


[edit] 80. fantanation (fn'tn'shn)

  • (n.) To have a very creative mystical immagination. As in: "You have a great fantanation."


[edit] 79. geekening (g'kn-ng)

  • (v.) The process of becoming a geek. See also: geekify.


[edit] 78. ack (k)

  • (interj.) An exclamation used when one is angry or upset.

Example: "Ack! I got an F on this test... My parents are gonna kill me."


[edit] 77. caffeinatic (k'f'nt'k)

  • (n.) Someone who is a fanatic regarding their caffeine consumption.


[edit] 75. vaseless (vs'ls)

  • (adj.) The state of lacking flower vases. Other forms include vaselessness.


[edit] 76. knick-knack-nack-kack (nk'nk')

  • (n.) Alternatively, A device whose creation and use was predetermined to be absolutely nothing; a useless contraption whose sole purpose is to annoy.

COCK!

[edit] 75. ID10T (-d-tn-t)

  • (adj.) Describes a computer "error," which is really user incompetence. Commonly used in computer circles. Origins: ID10T looks like idiot. The added 10 gives the word a binary feel.

Example: "Yeah, Ms. Wormwood made an ID10T mistake."


[edit] 74. backspackle (bk-spk'l)

  • (n.) Markings on the back of one's shirt from riding a fenderless bicycle in mud.


[edit] 73. cacker-whacker (k-ah-ker-whah-ker)

  • (n.) A weed whacker designed specifically to chop off large peckers.


[edit] 72. framulous (fram-yoo-luss)

  • (adj.) Used by art gallery managers to describe something that is both fabulous and capable of being be framed as a wall-hanging, such as a life-sized oil painting of Cher. Also used by corrupt politicians.

Example: "That Warhol Jackie-O repro is absolutely framulous!"


[edit] 71. smurfectomy (ha-l'k hoh-gen)

  • (n.) A medical procedure designed to return natural colour tone to skin that has turned blue.


[edit] 70. Viagrophy (vi-ag-ra'-fee)

  • (n.) A class of biography or autobiography written in a highly creative and selective manner to make the subject (inevitably someone still living and within the public eye) appear harder and more sexually interesting than normal.


[edit] 69. Familmabihet (fä-mil-ma-bi-het)

  • (n.) 9 men and 9 women in an arrowhead formation.


[edit] 68. Rzcarchiszcski (Rzszstsartszžr-sžtždški)

  • The yellow colored red waterlemon. (Yup! Lemon.)

[edit] 67. Jilging (Džil-ging)

  • A state where a person thinks who he is when he wasn't when he hasn't been what he has been who he hasn't been at all.


[edit] 66. Shig (Šig)

  • Quantity that is bigger than 0 and smaller than -1 at the same time.


[edit] 65. Jewmama (g-U-mah-mah)

  • Your mother Heb-man.


[edit] 64. Farquartette (far-CWar-tette)

  • Four members of the Farquar family family when they sing.


[edit] 63. Ringtoniate (ring-TONE-e-ate)

  • (v.)The act of letting your phone ring so people will listen to your stupid ringtone that you think is really cool but is actually quite gay.

Example: "Why would anyone ringtoniate a frog?"


[edit] 62.Hollerfront (AH-aha-ahaha )

Derived from the Northern Territory (Aus). Created by Tim Bastian, the word suggests that you will "brb" and are asking someone to "wait"//"Hold the Front" until you return to MSN messenger which this word is commonly used in. Originally used as slang from asian rapper, JIN


[edit] 61.Aquasalinate (A-kwa-sal-in-eight)

  • (v.) The exercise in which one adds salt to water, just for the effect of annoyancy (check below)

Example. Hey wtf you aquasalinated my water wtf?? now im dehydrated.


[edit] 60.Annoyancy (A-noy-in-sea)

  • (n.) An effect in which one becomes annoyed.


[edit] 59.Guesstimate (Gess-ti-mate)

  • (v.) We've all heard this one... UPDATE: This word now appears in Webster's dictionary


[edit] 58. Scandalitude (Scan-dal-i-tude)

  • orig. George W. Bush: (n.) An action rife with illegitimacy. Almost always used in the form a lot of ____ or full of ____ e.x. "Al Gore's supposed recount is filled with scandalitude."


[edit] 57. Quelt (Kwelt)

  • (v.) The act of quelting. e.g. To quelt something.


[edit] 59.Hylkish (Hjülk-iš)

  • (a.) Something gray and big. (possibly elephant)


[edit] 58.Unughzanny (An-ugh-zan-ni)

  • (a.) Something white and small. (possibly paracetamol)


[edit] 57.Bozone (B'o-Zh0-n-e)

  • (n.) A layer of gases surrounding an unintelligent individual, shielding them from good ideas.


[edit] 56.Illiterate at football (Ihl-eit-eriathe @ fuht-bawl)

  • (a.) Insulting someone at their skill in football, only to look like an idiot.

e.x. "Kelsey Gentner."


[edit] 55.Clemen ( ©£33-(\/)€n) )


[edit] 54.Como (Omoc)

  • (n.) Fat, obnoxious, stupid, retarded person who calls everybody "gay"


[edit] 53.Genosity (Gee-noh-zih-tee)

  • (n.) The rate at which a gene genes.

Example: "Hey, look at them genes go! The genosity is almost off the scale!"


[edit] 52.Zloboscope (Zloah-boh-skoape)

  • (n.) Instrument to inspect, view and also measure Zorkian Large Objects (ZLOBs).

Example: "Could you please pass me the zloboscope, nurse, I think this patient has an exceptional ZLOB! Never seen one this colour before! And it is big!"


[edit] 51. Antiunderivitize (an-ti-un-der-iv-i-tize)

  • (v.) In calculus, the act of taking a derivative for the sole purpose of pissing off your calculus teacher. Antiunderivitize ≈ Antiintegralization. QED.


[edit] 50. Underbamboozled (an-der-bam-boo-zld)

  • (adj) Used for and from jabronis.


[edit] 49. Digilent (di-gi-lint)

  • (adj) Portmanteau of "diligence" and "vigilance" meaning "diligent at being vigilant". Years of dodgeball had made digilent for oncoming dodgeballs.

[edit] 48. Timecubic (TĬM-kuub-ik)

[edit] 47. XYZZY (ZIZ-zee)

  • (n.) The only non-directional noun that can also be used as a verb. Eg. "Open grate! Down! West! XYZZY!"


[edit] 46. Ballsmack (bawl smak)

  • (v., n.) When one's scrotum gains sufficient pendular momentum while going down the stairs to hit one's inner thigh, resulting in an embarrassing smacking noise which happens frequently. WARNING: Ballsmack continuation (i.e. repeated and alternating smacking) can result in painful and irksome testicular bruising! If you encounter a ballsmack situation, stop immediately until your balls stop swinging around.

[edit] 45. Wadge (Wadge)

  • (v., n., adj, adv.,tr.) The only true versatile word that can be applied to many, many, many situations. Common uses include: "My Wadge is hurting", "Look at that massive wadge!", "Bro, you have a wadge hanging from your nose".

[edit] 44. exsqueese (x-sqee-z-mi)

[edit] 43. TonyDanzaphobia (toe-nee-dan-za-fo-bee-a)

  • (n.) The excessive fear of Tony Danza. Example: "Shut off the TV! Tony Danza in on every channel! Bill has TonyDanzaphobia!" A person possessing TonyDanzaphobia will go into extreme convulsions, crying, or gas releasing when he/she/it spots Tony Danza.

[edit] 42. Humourectomy (Hyoo-mer-eck-tummy)

  • (n.) Process of having every last ounce of funny extracted from your brain. Use: "Before becoming an Uncyclopedia admin, you must first undergo a humourectomy."'

[edit] 41. Spangabolubijubi (span-ger-bol-ooh-bee-jew-bee)

  • (n.) The fourth tree that ever existed. Use: "Oh look, a Spangabolubijubi in full flower. How nice."'

[edit] 40. Perilcomboculate (Pe-ril-com-bok-you-late)

  • (v.) The act of dying. Death. Use: "You shall perilcomboculate in a pit of flames!"'

[edit] 39. JIBNEY!

  • (int.) A word used to denote randomness and inside jokes. Use: "JIBNEY! Your joke was sooo Jibnaicious.

[edit] 38. Toastpaint

  • (v.) The act of toasting paint, or painting toast. Use: Dennis toastpaints to sell toast to Uncyclopedians.

[edit] 37. Deathmongers

  • (n.) Mongers/Collecters/Controllers of death. Use: The deathmonger knew it was time for the poor sap to die, so he released a death for him. Another deathmonger picked up the death for reuse someplace else.

[edit] 36. Ugoogly (yu-GOOGLE-y)

  • Yes....you know....the thing the ugooglizer says at a funeral....oh come on people..... A UGOOGLY!

[edit] 35. Oncomingly

  • (adv.) Used to describe something that is currently happening but is also about to happen. Similar to "oncoming", but inexplicably used on present-tense verbs. See about to be. Use: I think this is a sign of me oncomingly falling asleep.

[edit] 34. Scalaphobia (scah-lah-foah-bjuh)

  • (n.) Fear of stairs.

[edit] 33. Metacop (May-tah-cop)

  • (n.) An inconcrete concept of copness. Sort of a description what a universal cop should be and behave like. Used in discussions between people all over the world who have had wildly varying experiences with members of their own local police force (and lived through it). Example usage (taken form an actual IRC conversation): "And then the metacop fined me 100 bath for having bad breath". "Wow! A mere 100 bath? I was sentenced to six lashes with the Cat-o-Nine for looking cross-eyed at the Cap'ns daughtir!"

[edit] 32. Wangsta (WAYNG-stuh)

[edit] 31. scroof (skrΏf

  • (n.) A sky roof. founded by Joel and Ronny

[edit] 30. Sedatious (sedayshuss)

  • (adj.)you are way too technologically deprived.

[edit] 29. Voat(V-te)

  • (v.)To vomit a bit at the back of your throat. All these politicians make me want to voat.

[edit] 28. Ignoranus (IG-nor-aanis)

  • (n.)A person who is both stupid and an asshole.

[edit] 27. Misunderestimate (Miss-under-est-er-mate)

  • (n.)A word used to fuck up a really important speach.

[edit] 26. Genocided [Gen-oh-side-ed]

  • (v.)A word which means to commit genocide against a group, idea, or opponent in a Counterstrike game. "HEADSHOT! Man, you just got genocided!"

[edit] 25. Instubstantial (in-stub-stan-chul)

  • (adj.) Being too short and content free to be considered funny or useful.

[edit] 24. Clandestination (kl-ande-stin-at-un)

  • (n) The place where someone or something must go secretly. As Mike arrived at the airport he knew the balloon of heroin in his ass neared it's clandestination in Miami.

[edit] 23. anvillicious (ann-vill-ish-us)

  • (adj.) That one word that no one really wants to know but is there.

[edit] 22. medicinematic (med-i-sin-e-mat-ic)

  • (adj.) Using medical jargon, obscure health conditions and CGI anatomy effects paired with dramatic music and melodrama in lieu of solid writing in a TV program.

See House M.D., Grey's Anatomy

[edit] 5. skipple (SKIP-pullll)

  • (v.) To skip over a bunch of numbers on a top 100 list.


[edit] 4. Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis (noo-MAH-no-ultra-shut-the-fuck-up)

  • (n.) The inhillation of silicon molecules from volcanic ash :)

[edit] 3. Wikipedia (wicky-tedium)

  • (n.) An "encyclopedia" based on "facts" (whatever those are). Usually 7/10 people believe everything on wikipedia is true! But it's not, as shown by the 30489829728617165 statistics made by professionals.

[edit] 2. Evilgasm (Eh-Ville-Gas-Him)

  • (n.) To feel great pleasure from performing an evil act.

[edit] 1. Biscoffuckup

  • (n.) The process by which one or more biscuits are accidentally disintegrated in coffee, thus making it undrinkable.

[edit] See Also

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