Red

[edit] Red People

Phillip is a typical red haired boy living with the curse of red hair in this modern society

"Better dead than red," says the American pig. "Better dead than dead," says the French idiot. Everybody's always criticizing us red folk. Though red is our color, some other bastards always try to steal it. Take the Nazis. They come to kill us AND steal our color. For more about us red folk, see Communism.

[edit] Red in modern society

Due to its relation with communism, (In Soviet Russia, red colors YOU!) Red is seen as a symbol of the Bush agenda. As it is also used at Disney for symbolizing evil corporations (closely related to Bush) it should be seen as bad. Also, as 1/3 of the flag of France is red, red can be associated with France (closely related to Bush, Commies, the French, and evil corporations). Therefore, red should be considered most unpleasant and should be avoided at all cost. Unless you're me. Or you're Cuban, Russian, etc. Then, you can have a ball celebrating your part in communism. You know why we're red? Because of the color of the certain liquid we spill (hint hint).

[edit] Rednecks

Unfortunately, the effect of country sun on skin is red discoloration on the neck. People infected with this are known as rednecks, and cannot survive in the city. There is no known cure. WARNING: Side effects include beer addiction, hunting addiction, need to live in mobile homes, and poverty. There are many more side effects, but we do not want to overload the Uncyclopedia server with (more) useless drivel.

[edit] Color Blindness

It is also widely accepted that colourblind people can only see in red and shades of red, such as yellow, blue, black and Chinese.

[edit] See Also

• Red light
• Red Link
• Red Page
• Red Scare
• Bright red paper
• Red China
• Herring
• Sgt. Joe Hartsock
• Red Vs Blue
• Red ink
• Republican Party
• Little Red Riding Hood
• Communism
• Elmo
• Murray the Red Wiggle
• Pages that don't fucking exist
• Red Wine
• Kool Aid Man
• Red Green
• Ice Ketchup
• Santa Claus
• Satan
• Fairies

[edit] External Links

• Applegeeks Issue 187 - A brave discussion of the true horror that is the Kool-Aid Man.
• Official Kool-Aid website - Pity the poor misguided sailors and wanton miscreants who continue on with the propaganda that Kool-Aid Man is merely a harmless mascot.
• RAD - Extensive intake of said "harmless liquid" may result in a need of RAD treatment.